Written by: Dr. Dunni Atalabi, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Feeling broken down and distraught by the events that had happened lately I found myself crumbling to the floor like a pack of cards. This was followed by my drooping shoulders and sobs. Initially, they could barely be heard but soon became louder. I could feel my face assume an unflattering look. What I would call an ugly cry. With tears in my eyes, I asked the worst question I could ask myself at the time… WHY?
Have you ever felt this way? Have you felt distraught, perhaps overwhelmed, unable to focus on what is happening around you? Those are signs that you need to recharge very desperately. Overwhelm is real and so is burnout and they happen more frequently than we could potentially comprehend. it comes from a place of unreasonable expectation.
The expectations we place on ourselves and the ones that have been placed on us by others contribute to this overwhelm and burnout. It serves as a cause of blame, shame and guilt.
Mums feel this guilt every day. This guilt can rend your heart into many pieces, distort your mind and dampen your spirit. Can you see how this can impact your wellbeing of body, mind, soul, and spirit causing ill health and disease?
The ability to recognise it promptly and correctly is imminent. Better still is the ability to prevent it from happening.
Using the ABC technique, you would be able to shift from the feeling of overwhelm to one where you feel calm and empowered. And the best part of this is you just need a few minutes to make that shift. Of course, you can stretch it out to a few hours and create a zen moment to cultivate your overall well being. But you get my point. This can be done even if you are super busy.
It all starts with increased self-awareness of where you are and what you feel. To help this process, you can go to a quiet room or a comfortable space with minimal distraction.
There are then the 3 things to cultivate to create that calm that would be important in ensuring the shift from overwhelm.
A- Attitude of gratitude
This is like exposing yourself to a ray of sunshine and cool showers. They connect you to hopefulness, abundance and growth. It fosters within you the hopefulness that comes with you knowing that you are seen, you are heard, and you are loved. It is also a way of affirming yourself and those for whom you are grateful.
B- Breathe
This is the air that is required for the flow of energy within you. This is the ability to breathe in deeply and out fully. It gets rid of the dead space in the lungs and gives vitality to the body organs. It also has the benefit of calming your nervous system by the activation of the vagus nerve which is a proponent of the parasympathetic nervous system.
C- Concentrate on now
When you focus on the past, there is a risk of depression. When you focus on the future, you open yourself to worry. However, when you focus on now, you eliminate both. The ability to concentrate on the present moment is a key step to solving problems. It eliminates the feeling of guilt, despair, blame, fear, anxiety and helps you to be more objective about what is in front of you and what you can control.
Taking the steps in the ABC technique, in any given moment would lead you from a state of overwhelm even if you have just a few minutes to spare.
Try it and share it with someone today.
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Dr. Dunni Atalabi, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Dr. ‘Dunni is a life & wellbeing coach, family doctor, international speaker, teacher, author, entrepreneur, and mum who empowers mums to eliminate the feeling of overwhelm and exhaustion by tapping into the super powers within while enhancing overall wellbeing so that they can live the life of calm and abundance they desire and deserve. This became her mission following the death of her father, her journey through grief, and her desire to promote wellbeing even when grieving.
She is passionate about mums not only because they deserve holistic wellbeing because of the myriad of roles they perform but because they are beacons showing their children and people around them how to enhance their overall wellbeing in mind, body, soul, and spirit.
She is proficient in using natural, scientific, and medical wellbeing concepts to explain in simple terms practical ways and strategies to avoid ill health and promote overall wellbeing. This is made available by provision of online courses, written content, books, coaching, and regular events such as challenges where practical self-care and wellbeing strategies and tactics are shared to enhance holistic wellbeing on a daily basis.
