Written by: Kasia Dabrow-Kielan, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
One month ago, I was returning from an overseas trip. As always on every flight, a standard message rings in your ears, the safety instructions about what to do in case of an emergency announced by a friendly flight attendant. So why do airlines tell you to put your oxygen mask on first? When you fly on an airplane, the crew instructs you that in the event of pressure loss you need to “put your oxygen mask on first” before helping others. Why is this an important rule? It’s simple, because if you run out of oxygen yourself, you can’t help anyone else with theirs. This rule if you like, can and should be applied to our daily life.
If you are one of those people who puts a mask on others first and then yourself, you’re putting yourself in danger. The same applies when you look after others first on a daily basis and yourself last. I see clients, mothers, fathers, and partners who constantly put others first and then wonder why they are exhausted and have no time for themselves. Why do they feel ill? Why is it that human beings have this need of putting themselves last or simply ignore what we need to do in order to keep going? For me this was a hard lesson to learn and this is how I see it:
People are very resistant to change. People are great at making excuses for not getting their priorities in order while seeing what others could do better. Then there are those people who put everyone else’s needs ahead of their own. Why is that? I don’t have the answer to it, but I am almost convinced that ignorance and avoidance are a cause of illness. People get some sort of self-satisfaction knowing something was done for someone else, that we have done them a favour. Which is great, I am all for helping others, but let me put this in simple terms. Imagine if you’re a parent (for those that aren’t) and now this is how your child or significant other sees you, when you are unwell. My mother, without knowing it (bless her soul), neglected her needs and therefore her health. Mum didn’t know better and to be fair we didn’t either. For years dad and I attended with her to her many doctors’ appointments and no doctor could tell her what was causing her discomfort which later led to pain and all sorts of different diagnosis as to her conditions. I used to drive mum to appointments while studying for exams, sitting on hospital floors, in waiting rooms and even writing assignments while waiting in the car. What I recall most from this experience is not the hours spend on studying and driving around but the hours I observed my mum in pain, being told by her many doctors that they don’t know what is wrong and even that she was imagining things. It broke my heart over and over. Mum, the person who used to hold me tight as a little girl and shelter me from the world, was looking at me for answers and I couldn’t even provide her with hope. This was shattering and an experience I will never forget.
Somewhere in between all that I moved to London – after graduating from my post grad degree as a Social Worker and lived it up. Honestly, I think this was my escape from it all, until I got a phone call from home, saying mum was diagnosed with cancer. Without thinking twice I packed up my life full of adventure, travels and freedom and returned home to support mum with her treatment and dad with mental and physical support. I was the extra pair of hands around the house. I moved back home and got myself a job four kilometers away so I could be nearby. My manager at the time was super flexible as my working days were often disrupted with me rushing out of work to accompany mum to another appointment, to another specialist consult, surgery and so on.
This story is a snippet of why I encourage my clients to look on the flip side, what if you got sick, what and how would your closest see you and feel? Dad and I observed mum in pain for years and felt hopeless. Imagine how the life of your closest one changes because of your illness? If you gamble with your own health, you are also gambling with emotional, possibly physical health of those around you. Not intentionally of course. When mum passed away at 56 my world crumbled and I couldn’t pick up the pieces for a long time. Dad was the same although he tried not to show it, but on the inside, he also struggled. Both of us were there for each other but it wasn’t easy.
Years after, I thank the experiences I had for leading me into a new way of living. I searched for answers for years after her passing. I knew that the traditional western medical world didn’t have all the answers so who did? I researched and read books on health topics which led me to study iridology in Bali and to help others to live healthier life. I have clients who see me and seek advice for many reasons. My Social Work background means that I love to assist others and I enjoy working with people. I love connecting with people and learn about their stories. My life experiences injected me with a passion for natural healing and health. I changed careers and left Social Work world behind. What I didn’t leave behind is the passion to work with people, helping them to regain strength and control over their lives, their health and their understanding of themselves. I’m also trying to consciously remember to put my own oxygen mask on first and breathe, so I am able to help them while remaining healthy myself.
This is how Consciously Healthy was born.
Follow me on my website for more info!
Kasia Dabrow-Kielan, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Kasia Dabrow-Kielan worked as a Social Worker for almost 15 years and completed her Bachelor of Psychology and Social Work. Kasia's passion is to work with others and she is equipped with skills to enhance the well-being of her clients. She worked in various fields of Social Work in Australia and the United Kingdom. Kasia's personal experiences and life challenges made Kasia change her lifestyle and now has dedicated her life to helping others do the same, outside of Social Work. Kasia has passionately created her own brand Consciously Healthy, which the name speaks for itself. Kasia has become a Health Coach and studied Iridology in Bali. She offers Iridology, Sclerology, health consulting, 1 on 1 Health Coaching, and detox online programs. Kasia's hunger for knowledge does not rest and is keen to pursue further studies.
