Written by: Caroline Bellenger, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
As another year ends, it is common practice to review our past year and look at what we achieved, what we lost and what lessons we learnt. We faithfully set our New Year’s Resolutions from that journey of self-discovery.
And yet, despite the gusto and determination of our new year pledge, the reality is that only some people actually achieve these resolutions. By the end of January, most of us don't even remember what our intentions were. What I have learnt over the past few years of global chaos and unpredictability is that in 2023 I will have only ONE New Year Resolution, and that is “Believing In Myself”.
I always have been and will continue to be a proactive goal planner; however, life has taught me to be much more flexible with my goals and be prepared to alter them, delay them or delete them quickly when needed. So, my goals will ebb and flow throughout the year and not depend on a start date like 1st January.
And this is where my only New Year Resolution will have its most significant impact. Believing in ourselves is equally crucial to our determination to reach a goal and our ability to adapt when that goal no longer meets our needs. When we trust ourselves, we let go of all attachment to outcomes and allow the journey and the experiences to lead us in the most beneficial direction.
The truth about life is that not everyone is going to support you. And if we depend on that support or seek validation from that support, it can sometimes lead to disappointment. Expectation becomes resentment in credit! Yes, asking for help is essential; we need social connections and support as humans. However, when we believe in ourselves, we are less negatively impacted when that support doesn't materialise, or the praise never comes.
Believing in ourselves is simple but not always easy. Ultimately all you need to do is have an idea and believe you can do it. However, a combination of fears, limiting beliefs, trauma, environment and the primary human condition tend to conspire against us, creating this simple belief. These are my tips to help you start believing in yourself.
Understand that nothing in your past exists in your present.
Have gratitude for everything you have now, and don't focus energy on what you lack.
If one person can do something, then it is possible.
Whenever you have a negative thought about yourself, think of three positives.
Value your mind and body by making self-care a priority.
Break down goals into small achievable tasks.
Only control the controllable; let go of everything else.
Keep asking yourself why this is important.
You have made it this far in life, so you are already winning.
Laughter really is the best medicine.
You Are Enough.
If you can practice these and start believing in yourself, it will not matter what happens in 2023 because you will keep going and feel good about yourself. You will reach some goals; you will fail at others, and for some goals, you will start wondering why the hell you made them in the first place. Experiencing the challenging moments without doubting yourself allows you to stay focused on what is possible rather than seeing the situation as a failure.
So for 2023 and every year following, I plan on only ever making one New Year's Resolution, which will be to believe in myself. I hope you do the same!
Follow me on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, and visit my website for more info! Read more from Caroline!
Caroline Bellenger, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Caroline is an award-winning entrepreneur, mental health advocate, and wellness warrior. After experiencing childhood sexual abuse and over twenty years of addiction and mental health issues, Caroline enhanced her life by creating a toolbox of strategies that enabled her to improve her mindset, and self-esteem and create three successful businesses. As the founder of “Be The Impossible”, she has coached and inspired thousands of women to overcome their own life obstacles and create fulfillment and joy. She is the co-author of three books including Amazon's 1 Best Seller "Queens In Sand Castles". She has climbed to Everest Base Camp and competed in national sporting teams, including representing Australia in Triathlon at 50. Her transformation and achievements are a testament to her courage and determination to define her future regardless of age or past challenges. Caroline has dedicated her life to empowering other women through inspirational keynotes, books, coaching programs, and online education.
