Written by: Bruno Vanherberghen, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Do you feel shame and guilt about a certain addiction or habit in your life? Or maybe it is more of a repetitive nagging thought like ‘it would be good to quit this’ or ‘I should stop this’? Maybe you drink more alcohol than you would like? Or maybe it is caffeine, nicotine, marijuana, drugs, watching porn or something else that seems to have crept in, taking over much more space than we really want it to? Do you think about stopping but keep pushing it into the future because there is a lot going on in your life, or don’t have the motivation, or this or that?
Well, in our minds there is never a good time to stop. Ever. It is not uncommon that we try to find the ‘right’ time to stop, when life maybe calms down a little bit, or when this thing changes or that happens. That perfect, magical unicorn situation where all our stressors disappear doesn’t appear, and if it does, we don’t seize it or only seize it temporarily. We have become masters at creating excuses to rationalize our habits. We have a huge arsenal of excuses, and we easily buy into them.
The best time to quit is right now.
Now is the best time to quit. Right in this moment. Nothing exists outside of the present moment. It comes down to a question of priority. We can always keep kicking the can down the road. Tomorrow will be different. Right? How many times do we need to tell ourselves that before we realize it doesn’t happen?
It might not seem like now is the right time to quit your addiction and I suggest you pay close attention to the reasons and excuses that you use in your head. To overcome and find freedom from compulsion, we must stop listening to and accepting our own excuses.
Rationalizations.
What do we tell ourselves? The number of rationalizations is endless. We compare ourselves to others, tell ourselves it is not so bad. We tell ourselves we deserve it, after a long day, a stressful week, or maybe for a specific celebration. We minimize it even though we are cognizant of the full power that it holds over us. We have so many thoughts around it – the constant game we play of when we can have it, how we can have it and how much of it we can have. Time to stop buying into our own excuses. The day you do that is the day change comes.
You tried on your own, now get help with an addiction accountability coach.
Most people have tried to quit on their own. Most likely many times, possibly hundreds of times. If that has been successful, great, well done! However, if you have failed as many times as you have tried, then the habit remains in your life.
Through this repetitive try and fail process we lose all accountability towards ourselves in this specific part of our lives. We are probably rock-solid, trustable with a highly level of integrity in all other parts of our lives. Since we have lost accountability to ourselves, it helps to make a commitment to another person who will guide us, support us to drive change while keeping us accountable. Maybe that is an anonymous group such as a twelve step program, maybe that is therapy, or maybe it is an addiction accountability coach such as myself. Maybe it is all three.
Surround yourself with the people you need to help you overcome this habit and find newfound freedom. You can do it.
Bruno Vanherberghen, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Bruno is a life coach, specialized in helping people overcome their addictions and compulsive patterns. He knows how to step out of old patterns and emerge on the other side with a newfound freedom and drive for life. The ability to delay instant gratification to pursue longer term goals, follow and realize dreams and aspiration. We need to do things differently and Bruno is an expert at helping to manage personal change.
He suffered from heavy depression during his 20's at which point many of his compulsive behaviors spiraled out of control. Alcohol, drugs, porn, caffeine, sugar, gaming, food issues were some of his personal struggles. He can proudly say that the compulsion is a thing of the past.
He has coached over 700 individuals, has over 120 customer verified testimonials, an approval rating of 95% and more than 98% improve.
He has a deep personal understanding of addiction and is empathic, encouraging, caring with an occasional gentle firmness to help people realize the goals they set for themselves. His mission: to support people to realize their full potential.
