Written by: Tricia Brouk, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
I’m a big believer in an apology. I’m happily married and we apologize to each other all the time. The ability to apologize effectively is an honorable and valuable quality.
However, you should NEVER apologize from the stage. EVER.
Whether you are in the rehearsal room, or stepping onto the stage for your talk, or standing up at the wedding of your best friend, do not apologize. If your script bursts into flames and you can’t remember one word you wrote, take a deep breath and put out the fire.
Apologizing is the surest way to lose our trust. And if you are always apologizing in rehearsal, it will happen on stage. I’ve worked with actors who apologize so often in rehearsal they’ve actually said “sorry” unconsciously during a show. They have trained themselves to apologize instead of wait. This is the trick you can rely on again and again. Wait.
If you forget a line, wait. Take a walk to the podium and look at your notes. If you stumble over a word, say it again. If your clicker stops working and the slide doesn’t come, find it funny. Laugh it off. We’ve all been there. It’s okay. We don’t mind, and we won’t judge you, unless you apologize.
If you forget a line, wait.
If you stumble over your word, simply say it again.
If you have a technical malfunction, laugh it off and then ask for help.
The audience is rooting for you. Believe that. When we go to the theater, we are excited and awed by the actors before the curtain even rises. It’s the same for your talk. We are there to be taken on a journey and we want to go with you. Apologizing for yourself creates worry, anxiety and distance from the audience. We lose our ability to trust you and it’s really hard to get that back. When you stand fully present in your truth and speak from a place of authenticity and vulnerability, without apologizing for anything, you will win us over from the moment you step onto the stage. And that’s when you’ll have the impact you desire to have.
Tricia Brouk, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Tricia Brouk is an international award-winning director. She has worked in theater, film, and television for three decades. Tricia founded The Big Talk Academy where she certifies speakers in the art of public speaking. She was the executive producer of Speakers Who Dare and TEDxLincolnSquare and now The Big Talk Live. She is currently being featured in a new documentary called Big Stages, which highlights the transformation of her speakers. Tricia’s commitment and devotion to inclusion is a priority as all of her shows, events, and communities are diverse. She curates and hosts the Speaker Salon in NYC, The Big Talk, an award-winning podcast on iTunes and YouTube. The Influential Voice: Saying What You Mean for Lasting Legacy was a 1 New Release on Amazon in December 2020. She was awarded Top Director of 2019 by the International Association of Top Professionals and Top Ten Speaker Coaches in Yahoo Finance in 2021. Her documentaries have received critical acclaim—winning Best Documentary Short at The Olympus Film Festival and Los Angeles Movie Awards. Tricia has spoken at Forbes, Pride Global, New York Public Library, I Heart My Life Live and The National Organization for Rare Disorders.
