Written by: Silvana Avram, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
It is at times like these, when the world is in turmoil, when we are faced with existential questions, that we must have the courage to formulate our answers, to acknowledge our fears, and to assume our choices.
“In the truest sense, freedom cannot be bestowed; it must be achieved.” ‒ Franklin D. Roosevelt
Addressing the British parliament, on the 13th day of the Russian attack on Ukraine, Volodymyr Zelensky, the Ukrainian president who has become a symbol of resilience and bravery around the world, asked a fundamental question and gave a definite answer. “The question for us now is to be or not to be,” Zelensky said, evoking Shakespeare. “I can give you a definitive answer: It’s definitely to be.”
Right now, for the Ukrainian people, and for so many around the world, freedom means preserving their identity, as individuals, as a nation, as a country.
But what about the rest of us?
What about you? What does freedom mean to you, personally?
Freedom is one of those concepts we all feel we understand, intuitively, as the Greek philosophers suggested, 2000 years ago.
“Is freedom anything else than the right to live as we wish? Nothing else.” – Epictetus
The story of humanity is a story of striving for freedom. Throughout the ages, people have always seen freedom as one of the most important ideals – worthy of sacrificing one’s life for it.
Our shared stories of courage and heroism are intrinsically related to the fight for freedom.
Despite huge advances in recent decades, liberation from all forms of oppression continues to be a major challenge for many communities around the world, highlighted in recent years by various social movements, or by dramatic events unfolding in Syria, Hong Kong, Afghanistan, or, even as I write, in Ukraine.
And new developments in science and technology have brought new challenges. In a world of information overwhelm, are we free to make our decisions? To what extent are we influenced by our cultural perspective, or manipulated by the sources we use? What does freedom mean in the post-truth era? Does it mean that we can choose our “alternative reality”?
And what does freedom mean for each one of us, individually?
From breaking free from the shackles of slavery, to liberating oneself from attachments and achieving enlightenment, freedom has always been a leading factor on the journey towards personal emancipation.
I speak from experience. In my Coaching Conversations, freedom is one of the values that come up most frequently.
We all want to be free. Yet, despite being a universal value, freedom means different things to different people, not surprisingly.
It is, therefore, up to each one of us to decide what we understand freedom to be and how important freedom is to us. And it is crucial that we do so.
Our understanding of freedom will define the choices we make and the way we live our life. It will impact our community. It will determine the future of humanity.
What is more important to us, freedom, or safety?
How do we balance individual freedom with the constraints of living in a community?
Does freedom include responsibility ‒ towards others, towards the environment, towards our planet?
To what extent are we influenced by genetics, social background, upbringing, and education, and how do we exercise our free will?
How can we reconcile freedom from attachment with the human condition?
Can we be happy without being free?
These questions have been around since the beginning of human existence. They have helped us forge our view of the world and they continue to push us to find answers.
But there are also new questions arising, specific to our times.
What does freedom mean in a post-truth era, where widespread access to information goes hand in hand with manipulation?
Are our choices really ours? Are we free to choose who we want to be?
At a time when we are confronted again with existential threats as individuals, and as humanity, it is perhaps more important than ever to revisit these questions and to find our own, honest answers.
Whilst, unavoidably, we share a certain perspective on freedom with other members of our society, ultimately, each one of us must find our own definition of what it truly means to be free.
To help you further explore these questions and formulate your own answers, here are three different perspectives to understanding freedom, which can also be seen as steps or stages in personal emancipation.
3 Steps to personal freedom
1. Freedom as liberation – “I am free from external limitations. I take my power back.”
“From every mountainside, let freedom ring.” ‒ Martin Luther King, Jr
The first step on our journey to personal freedom is freedom from external limitations.
The fight for freedom has been the dominant trigger for independence wars, mass movements and national revolutions. Throughout history, people have been fighting for freedom from oppression, freedom from slavery, freedom from colonialism, freedom from economic domination, freedom from discrimination, freedom from social injustice. And the fight goes on.
At a personal level, this is a crucial step too. As we mature, we gradually learn to become independent. For those of us lucky enough to live in democratic societies, the fight for independence takes the shape of following our dreams and aspirations as we strive to be free: psychologically, financially, intellectually.
Yet, there are still many forms of slavery present in our modern world. Too many people, women especially, continue to live in fear and are trapped in abusive relationships. The lack of physical freedom is aggravated by psychological dependency.
Others are forced to stay in an unhappy relationship or an unhappy job because they are materially and psychologically dependent on them.
Addiction is a typical example of external dependency that leads to us losing our freedom. Anything that makes us dependent on someone, or something is a form of giving our freedom away.
For some, the addiction is so powerful, that they feel compelled to steal, or even kill, so they can continue to buy drugs or alcohol. Some can’t stop gambling or shopping. Others spend hours watching TV or playing games on their computer. Some of us eat too much, some of us work too much. And then, of course, there are those of us, many, who cannot imagine living without their mobile phone. Think of how dependent we all have become on the internet. On social media and online platforms. Dependency can be obvious or subtle. But it always takes our freedom away.
Whilst we must all evolve with the times and make the most of new advances in science and of new discoveries, we must also remain vigilant and continue to evaluate benefits against downsides. Are our pleasures or habits making us happy? Are they liberating us, allowing us to be who we want to be? Or are they enslaving us, making us more dependent and difficult to please, unhappy? At times, it looks like in our modern world, when many of us have the privilege to live in free and open societies, we have traded a significant part of our freedom for fleeting pleasure and temporary comfort.
Is that true of you?
Do you feel you are still free? Free to make informed decisions, free to put an end to any dependency?
Any dependency ‒ from the extreme of being physically controlled by others to being psychologically enslaved to our own inner demons, often without realising it, is a form of slavery. Sometimes we choose these dependencies – or we think we do. It is extremely important to ask ourselves, from time to time: is this helping or hindering me?
Does this dependency make me weaker or stronger?
What about you? Is there an area where you feel you have given too much of your freedom away?
Does that bother you? Is freedom in that area important to you?
If so, what small step could you take today, to re-establish a healthy balance?
Spend some time thinking about this, in a calm and measured way. Be patient and kind with yourself. Consider the circumstances that led you to some of your past choices. Look at the pros and cons of continuing with some of your habits.
Then, make a decision.
Try not to attach any blame or guilt to this process. You are simply ready to take some of that freedom back. If you need help, do reach out. Asking for help is a form of exercising your freedom!
When we become aware of what freedom means to us, and how much of our freedom we give away, we feel empowered to make better choices.
“No one outside ourselves can rule us inwardly. When we know this, we become free.” ‒ The Buddha
2. Freedom as emancipation – “I am free from inner limitations – I am free to be me.”
“Freedom is not worth having if it does not include the freedom to make mistakes.” ‒ Mahatma Gandhi
“I know but one freedom and that is the freedom of the mind.” ‒ Antoine de Saint-Exupery
“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” ‒ Stasi Eldredge
Whilst it may seem relatively easy to at least identify (if not get rid of) external limitations and dependencies that result in us giving our freedom away, it is much more difficult to spot some of the inner blockages we all develop. In Coaching terms these are often called limiting beliefs, and they refer to judgements about ourselves, that we believe to be true.
We are all familiar with these beliefs about ourselves, but we do not always realise the extent to which they restrict us and affect our freedom.
They vary from apparently innocent statements like “I am rubbish at maths!”, “I can’t cook!”, “I am a terrible dancer!” to “I am clumsy!”, “I am useless!” and the more insidious: “I am not good enough!”, “I am a failure!”, “I am not worthy of love and appreciation!”.
I hope these statements sound harsh to you as you read them because they are. Yet, we all carry these beliefs and, tragically, more often than not, they remain unchallenged.
How do they impact our freedom?
Well, let me ask you, if you believe that you are a failure, or an impostor, or simply not good enough, not experienced enough, will you have the courage to try something new? Will you be able to dream big and follow your dreams?
Our limiting beliefs restrict our freedom because they keep us trapped, they convince us that we cannot be better, do better ‒ that we are powerless.
And unless we change our beliefs, we will not be able to change our reality.
Often, we need help from others to identify these limiting beliefs and replace them with new, empowering ones. That’s where Coaching can guide you and support you.
But you can start working on your limiting beliefs today, with these simple steps:
Identify your limiting beliefs by paying more attention to the things you tell yourself, sometimes out loud, most of the time in your head. Keep a journal for this. Write down these thoughts every time you spot them. This will get easier once you get into the habit of doing it. Notice the frequency and intensity of these thoughts. Are there any specific circumstances that trigger them?
Confront your limiting beliefs by questioning their accuracy. Find counter-examples demonstrating their shallowness. Are these beliefs reflecting your current reality? Often, we carry these beliefs from our childhood. It is important to reassess them and to notice that we have evolved, that things are not as bad as we once believed, or that they are not as defining as we had imagined. Who cares whether you are a good dancer, as long as you are having fun? What if “clumsy” is, in fact, a sign of creativity? As for “I am not good enough” – let me tell you this: it is blatantly untrue. Each one of us is unique, and your only job is to be you. No one else can be you and you should not try to be anyone else. You are enough by being you. Period. Anything else is useless and cruel self-punishment. Choose to stop that today. Right now.
Replace your limiting belief with a positive, empowering statement: “I am learning to cook and I am becoming better at it with every day.” “I cannot fail. Only I can be me.” “By giving myself the love and appreciation I deserve and desire, I become more lovable and more loving every day.”
Continue to stay alert and repeat these steps every time a new limiting belief arises. It is an ongoing process. And that’s the beauty of it. We all experience these beliefs, in various shapes and with different intensities. The better you become at identifying and questioning your beliefs, the more patient and understanding you will be towards yourself, and towards others.
Being human is striving to get better every day. There is so much beauty in this! Remind yourself that you are doing your best. Be proud of who you are and of what you are doing to free yourself of limitations and to help others too.
And remember to stay open.
The more we learn, the freer we become.
“Freedom, in any case, is only possible by constantly struggling for it.” Albert Einstein
3. Freedom as responsibility – “I am responsible for myself, for my actions, for my reality. With freedom comes responsibility.”
“Freedom is the will to be responsible to ourselves.” ‒ Friedrich Nietzsche
“May we think of freedom not as the right to do as we please, but as the opportunity to do what is right.” ‒ Peter Marshall
“For to be free is not merely to cast off one’s chains, but to live in a way that respects and enhances the freedom of others.” ‒ Nelson Mandela
When we are free from external limitations, and when we have seen through our most stifling limiting beliefs, we can taste the freedom that comes from being ourselves, from making our unique contribution to the world and to society, consciously.
We are free to take responsibility – for our life, for our legacy.
Nelson Mandela’s inspiring journey to freedom is a perfect example of enfranchisement from the three perspectives we mentioned. He had to fight for his people’s right to be free. He was imprisoned but did not allow imprisonment to stop him – on the contrary. He used these circumstances as motivation to set himself free from limiting beliefs, from victimhood and helplessness, from hatred and despair. When he came out of prison, he was ready to lead by example, to take responsibility for building a fairer society. He was able to teach others to be free.
Three steps to personal freedom:
Freedom as liberation ‒ physical freedom ‒ freedom from external limitations.
Freedom as emancipation ‒ psychological freedom ‒ freedom from inner blockages.
Freedom as responsibility ‒ the moral and ethical responsibility that comes from being free.
I believe that, as human beings, it is in our DNA to want to be free.
That is why the individual stories of our heroes, the collective stories of nations and communities, and the wider story of humanity have been defined by the constant fight for freedom, by our inextinguishable aspiration to be free.
As humans, we are programmed to want to be better, to aim higher.
Freedom is the fuel to all our dreams.
Freedom is the ultimate aspiration, the highest destiny for humanity.
Freedom is not just our right, but our duty.
“Freedom is nothing else but a chance to be better.” ‒ Albert Camus
“Freedom is the open window through which pours the sunlight of the human spirit and human dignity.” ‒ Herbert Hoover
I hope you enjoyed our brief exploration.
Now it’s your turn.
Take responsibility. Find your own answers to the big questions about freedom.
What does freedom mean to you?
What does it mean for you, personally, to be free?
Take time to think about it, to explore. Be patient with yourself, be alert, be brave. Stay committed. The journey to freedom is, undoubtedly, an arduous journey. But it is so worth it!
Your answer will empower you to make the right choices. To be the best you can be.
It will deepen our shared understanding of ourselves – as humanity.
Being you – being free, is your ultimate contribution to our common story.
Silvana Avram, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Silvana Avram is a successful, Inspirational Life Coach, philosopher, author, teacher, and founder of Life Coaching with Silvana – whose mission is to empower us to embrace our uniqueness, fall in love with life, fulfil our potential and create a beautiful legacy.
Fascinated from a young age by the mystery of life and our place in the universe, Silvana has been on a quest to find her own answers to the big existential questions facing humanity. Now an acclaimed Coach and Author, she draws on her extensive study of Philosophy, Psychology, Meditation, Holistic Healing, and Spirituality to create a uniquely inspirational and empowering style of Coaching – also reflected in her Book “Being You and Loving You” in which she guides us through an unforgettable, transformative journey of self-discovery and self-love.
Convinced that we can overcome the prevalent paradigms of fear and division, Silvana has recently focussed her attention on developing a radically innovative approach, outlined in her upcoming book, “Living in Eternity” – and which has earned her an unexpected nickname: “Miss Eternity”! She argues passionately that, rather than chasing goal after goal and living for tomorrow, we should, instead, live every day, every moment, with the joy, awe, and serenity we experience when we see our lives from the perspective of Eternity. When we choose to live in Eternity, everything falls into place, everything we do takes on a different meaning, and we become aware that, as humanity, we are, in fact, constantly creating our common legacy.
Silvana’s ambition: to inspire us to write a better story for ourselves – and for humanity – in Eternity!
