Written by: Olga Kiendler, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
The “007” learnings to change in personal and professional life.
It was another beautiful Friday I woke up in my beloved desert city. While the mystical oil-lamp scents were spreading around my apartment mixing with the smell of the freshly roasted coffee, there I was, planning a beach day with someone I had just recently met. The thought of spending the day with this mysterious "still-stranger" made me happy. The intellectual proximity and interest in life we shared made me intrigued and excited to explore more.
"I'll just finish off this article and then I'll hit the road", I thought.
The much-debated topic of when is the right time to leave the corporate world seemed to have gained momentum over the last few months especially due to the pandemic. Moreover, it seemed to have turned into a pandemic itself. An update on this topic felt just right.
Being someone who left the corporate world at a for me back then, too early stage, I had to fight twice as hard. Reminiscing those days, I was struggling to put my emotions into words.
My thoughts were mixed in the exact same way as when I decided to step out.
While I mastered the more pragmatic part of the transition really well I found myself in an emotional roller-coaster that interfered with all the rationally supported pros and cons. I felt fear, disappointment, excitement, the desire for freedom and autonomy mixed with the burning desire to succeed, prove something to myself, to live, be around the people I truly cared about.
If you are feeling the same way, to gain clarity on your transition it is imperative to consider the following:
Know Yourself
Self-awareness comes as your superpower when deciding on your next step. How self-aware are you? Have you considered professional help in form of hybrid coaching? Some of the questions you can ask yourself: Are you a more risk-averse type or do you like to play it safe? Do you long for the sense of belonging and safety or are you driven by uncertainty, adrenaline kicks, and passion no matter what? When do you perform at best? Do you have a support system around you? Are you aware of the changes in front of you and how they will affect you? What are your coping mechanisms? What is your drive – will it make you or will it break you? A boot-strapping entrepreneur might be supported by the same emotion that could break a newcomer from the corporate world.
Know Your Why
What is the underlying reason and emotion for aspiring the change? Make sure you understand what drives you, why you want to do certain things. Money alone is never reason enough, remember that! Are you driven by emotion? (we always are). Identify it, understand it and manage it if needed. Get professional help. You need to see things clearly. Between ration and emotion, emotion always wins.
To discover the underlying emotion, check out these few questions: Do you feel appreciated in your current setting? Do you lack personal freedom and autonomy? Do you feel like you are missing out on life? Do you feel good enough? What is your why? Passion spurs things up. At the same time, passion can become an addiction and you may end up in a golden cage of your drives and emotions, forgetting why you stepped out at first.
Are you really ready to leave?
Be brutally honest with yourself. Depending on where you stand in life, do the circumstances allow you to venture into the unfamiliar, and what coping mechanisms do you have? Was your decision to leave triggered by an emotion? Which one? Don't let your ego or a personal disappointment drive you, ever. Be humble, be realistic. Weigh off your emotions.
Can you afford to leave?
Make sure you have sufficient funds to get you going for longer than you think. Depending on the stage of your life consider how possibly burning your savings will impact your emotional and mental stability. Consider having a passive income. Pave the road for the transition. No matter how much you own, the feeling of not performing on the same financial level will get you down. Make sure you don't associate your self-worth with material assets. It will tear you up. Work on yourself before you transition. You will be stronger, more resilient, and more successful.
Are you aware of what the change brings?
Consider how the change will affect your lifestyle, your thought process, and your mental wellbeing. Get ready to accept the unknown and unlearn the known. You won't be able to read about the unknowns in a book. Only experience will uncover them for you. Understand what meaning you are attaching to a certain situation and what emotion arises from it, as it will impact your decision-making processes. Build a coping mechanism to deal with the change and the unknowns through hybrid coaching.
Get used to unlearning what you already know and adopting a fresh approach.
Sunken in my thoughts, the city skyline started to disappear behind the increasingly hazed windows due to high humidity that made it impossible to spend the day at the beach. Instead, we decided to watch the new James Bond movie, "No time to die". Little did I know that I will end up crying next to this "still stranger" who was humming Louis Armstrong's words "We have all the time in the world" next to me.
I wished I had more time to get to know him better before we traveled. Just for this one song, just for this one moment that let me realize that we don't have all the time. "Or maybe we could postpone our trips… and make some time? But, what if he doesn't feel the same way. The little voice inside my head went on… "Oh well, I guess, time will tell" ...but will it really? I better figure out now? Right? Or maybe not…. the moment will pass. What if the time is now…I have more time, do I? Should I?"
Aren't these the questions you ask yourself most of the time? The "What ifs". While some may consider them as signs of indecisiveness I see them as a humble way of being human... Self-doubt, fears, insecurities we dwell upon while the time passes, the moment goes.
So, what then are we supposed to do?
Act now, do all the things you always wanted to do. Don't scare off from change. Step out of your comfort zone. Make the unfamiliar familiar and the other way around. The only thing that stops us from moving forward is fear. Leave that company, change your life, love that person. Or stay and find the way to freedom and fulfillment from within in everything you do.
We meet people and find ourselves in certain situations for a reason. The timing may be right or not, but there will never be all the time in the world. Open up, embrace… universe has your back…and all of the sudden, the time is on your side and you don't need to time. Synchronicities start appearing. You are in a flow.
And should you still be thinking of leaving that job, ask yourself… Do I really have enough time for life to unfold all the precious things it has in store? Define your precious things and go for them. Now! They might be just one step away and you may not even need to change that much… or do you?
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Olga Kiendler, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine Olga Kiendler is a Rapid Transformational Therapist and Executive Coach. She combines latest cutting-edge therapy and coaching techniques to fast track increase in Emotional Intelligence in individuals and teams by freeing them from unwanted emotional and behavioral patterns within a record time. She also holds an Executive MBA from the London Business School and has previously worked for years in the corporate world in managerial positions across the globe. In one of her recent interviews, Olga said: "The time has finally come for more holistic, empathic and empowering leadership. This starts from within. You can't just "Do" it, you have to "Be" it, and to "Be" you need to free yourself from unwanted, disturbing patterns in private and professional life."
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