Written by: Mindy Schrager, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
How often do you consider the consequences of your actions, in particular, the impact of your actions on other people?
Two recent experiences highlighted for me how the actions of others can have unintended consequences that the individuals involved may not be conscious of and/or care about.
During a recent round of mini golf, there was a noticeable slowdown of the groups in front of us. As I glanced ahead, I saw groups of three, four, five, and a rather large group of seven. The smaller groups (including ours) were consistently having to wait. Out of curiosity, I checked the scorecard rules, and it indicated that the group limit for each game was four people. How was it that a group of seven was allowed to play all together?
While I understood that a family group would prefer to play together, the unintended consequence was that the four groups following them all had to sit and wait for them to finish. I know it impacted my enjoyment of the game, and the young children in the group immediately ahead of us were fidgeting which would suggest it impacted them as well. How would the outcome have been different if the group of seven had considered the consequences and split into two smaller groups instead?
The second experience occurred during a recent trip to the dump that resulted in a frustrating but laughable moment. When I arrived, there was a line of cars waiting to enter the area with the various dumpsters. This happens occasionally when many cars show up at the same time; usually on weekends. However, it was not a weekend, and the line of cars was not especially long, it simply wasn’t moving, which led to the backup. The cause was a truck with a small trailer attached whose driver seemed insistent on parking in a specific space, even though he was unable to effectively park there. He eventually settled into his desired space, just as that particular section posted a closed sign. What would have been the outcome if the driver had chosen a different space in the first place, even if he had to walk a bit further?
While it is important to focus on our own needs, the law of cause and effect and the fact that there are others impacted by our actions would suggest we might benefit by doing a quick assessment of the consequences of our actions.
Questions to ask yourself could include:
Will my action Inconvenience others?
Might I be putting others at risk?
Could my action be perceived as disrespectful or inconsiderate?
Am I crossing a boundary?
Does my short-term action have long-term effects?
Am I misinterpreting the truth of the situation?
Am I taking an opportunity away from someone else?
Is this the only possible way?
Am I acting from a place of responding or being triggered?
Is someone else’s ability to choose impacted?
While you may question taking the time to review the unintended consequences of your actions on another person, preventing harm, avoiding negative consequences in the long-term, not having to waste time with a do-over, along with not doing something you’ll regret forever are all benefits of stepping back and taking a moment. If you find yourself reacting or acting in haste, consider Meeting the Shadow as an opportunity to shift those patterns.
© 2023, Systems of Change, LLC
Mindy Schrager, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Mindy Schrager is an ICF PCC credentialed coach, Systemic Facilitator, Aura-Soma practitioner and founder of Systems of Change, LLC. Mindy’s focus on and passion for transformational work is built on years of experience creating strong, well-balanced teams, combined with a powerful personal discovery journey. Her experience and training have been focused on creating positive change in life and business experiences working with individuals and groups. Mindy loves to shine a light on hidden patterns and the root cause of dysfunction and then help create new pathways to growth.
