Written by: Gina Lokken, ICF PCC, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
When I was single, life felt a lot simpler. Since I was only responsible for myself, it seemed possible to set up a regular and organized schedule. If I just worked hard and was intentional with my time, then surely, I could have it all: run a successful business, get more education, spend time with my friends, eat healthier, work out every day, see my parents, and have an Instagram-worthy home.
I couldn't shake this romantic idea that a perfectly balanced life was available to me. I was always chasing after that goal, trying to live up to the expectations of others and copy what worked for them.
And year after year, that unicorn life seemed further and further out of reach. Especially after I married and became a mother!
What am I doing wrong? I would think while cleaning up a sink full of dishes while my toddler screamed in the background. What secret am I missing?
And that's what this blog series is all about, friend. It's the secret sauce, the key to success.
Are you ready?
The secret is: there is no such thing as a perfectly balanced life. And the sooner you recognize that your life will be messy, out of balance, beautiful, and unlike anyone else's life, the sooner you can embrace your own personal rhythm.
Because when we chase after someone else's idea of a perfectly balanced life, we are chasing after an illusion. When we take on or adopt their beliefs, values, and expectations, we lose who God created us to be: someone utterly one of a kind.
So, hear me when I say that the number one limiting belief that we, as mom entrepreneurs, hold that keeps us stuck chasing after a perfectly balanced life is comparison.
Limiting Belief 1: Comparison
"Look how balanced and perfect their life and business look compared to mine."
The world has conditioned us to buy into the lie that what we see is what we get. Someone's Instagram feed is an accurate depiction of their daily life. Their business success translates into a successful marriage. Their curated home means they have a curated life. If they look like they have it all figured out, they must be sailing through the week on a cloud of perfection.
Comparison can play out strongly in our lives, especially as women. It's so easy to focus on what we don't have instead of what we do have, comparing our lives to those who "look like" they have it all together. But when we compare our life story to someone else's, we will never feel like we've "made it" in our life or business. Instead, we will spend countless hours and a vast number of resources trying to live a life that wasn't ours to live in the first place.
Going through the process of life coaching helped me to stop holding my life up to other women's lives. It allowed me to discover and value the parts of myself that make me and my story unique.
As you head into this week, lean away from the limiting belief of comparison and into this newly expanded belief:
"I am exactly where I need to be, and I am becoming the person God already knows me to be."
I wholeheartedly believe that your life will have beautifully balanced moments, but they won’t come from chasing after what was meant for someone else. So, stop looking in your neighbor’s yard and start celebrating things on your own. In any case, the journey is far more rewarding and impactful than the destination. Never stop improving, learning, and growing.
Gina Lokken, ICF PCC, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Gina is passionate about helping female entrepreneurs, business professionals, and leaders infuse God into their everyday personal and professional lives so that they can become the person He designed them to be. She firmly believes business and faith do not have to be separate, and business does not have to be boring. Gina specializes in strengths-based leadership and team building, creating cultures of joy through neuroscience practices, leadership and communication training, and creative coaching methodologies that propel her client's past what they originally thought was possible!
