Written by: Kristen Bilodeau, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Undeniably, the pandemic has impacted individuals on a cultural, societal, and individual level. For many, the experience of life turning upside down happened without warning and restructured their work, family, and living in ways they didn’t imagine. Working and living our lives from the confines of our home challenged many relationships- including our relationship with ourselves. Many have shifted careers out of necessity or found themselves out of work. Many started rethinking their career choices, evaluating relationships and lifestyle choices, while many faced many mental health challenges such as anxiety and depression.
As we emerge from this experience, we find ourselves on the doorstep of change. As a country and world, we are on the brink of many unknowns; but as individuals, we have a unique opportunity to undergo our own transformation, our own unique change. We can create a clean slate, new beginnings, a life on different terms. While many ponder what life was like pre-pandemic, there is a sense of what has passed as being just that - the past. We can shift from what was to what could be. For many women who maintained the role of mother, wife, professional, and homeschooling teacher during this pandemic, a season of change creates the opportunity to reemerge, as even more of the women they are. In a society that focuses on the “unveiling” of a bikini body, women can step out in a more powerful light by focusing on the reemergence of themselves with a narrative of their choice.
Generations of women who have suffered from the limited belief that change is something they need permission for, even though it has undeniably been what we must grant ourselves. We are now presented with the opportunity to shed old layers and feel freer than ever to grant that permission amidst all the changes that will inevitably take place in our world post-pandemic.
Evaluating Your Current Operating System
Change can feel like a fearful prospect; it is what sets us free from habits that don’t serve us and makes room for the growth that propels us forward. The first step to identifying areas of needed change come from evaluating the current operating system; what is the narrative script that has been running your life? What obligations, perceptions, or identities have you felt chained to or weighed down by? If you knew you had the power to change it, what would you change now? Without considering the “hows” or the obstacles you believe would block that change, what would lead to more lightness, less stress, and more freedom if they were to exist in your life?
Identifying the areas of change is about thinking in possibility, not in resistance. Resistance is what blocks change; letting go of the belief that the change can’t be is the first step in creating the change. We are in a time of letting go of the old. Embrace this with letting go of areas where you might have hesitated or resisted the change you intuitively feel is needed.
Pruning: Creating Space to Grow
In order for plants and flowers to be healthy and thrive, they need to be pruned to make space for new growth. If your external reality and inner self are cluttered with thoughts, feelings, and behaviors that are not serving you, you will find little time or energy to accomplish what you do want.
In order to declutter and create habits that lead you towards change, you need to get comfortable with change. You must see yourself as capable of changing your mind, body, thoughts, behaviors. Life moves in birth- death-life cycles; for birth to occur, death must occur, and that is natural, normal, and necessary for growth and evolution. Just as plants need pruning to remove what is dead or could lead to disease, we too need to remove the parts that prevent growth and life from reemerging.
The women who are not afraid to stand in their own light or are not limited by other people’s opinions or expectations are those who are admired for being the women they are, not of how they should be.
Rewriting the Script: Creation of the New Narrative
Despite what culture, society, or religion may lead women to believe, we have the power and intuition to create our life and identity. By choosing to build a life that leads to growth and expansion, we free ourselves from living by expectation, obligation, or the need to please or appease- we give ourselves room to expand and thrive.
As we are in a time when many are reevaluating life and how their behaviors, habits, and work choices impact their health and well-being, we have a lens in which we can now, more than ever, ask ourselves honest, truthful questions. What areas are lacking meaning and connection in our lives, in our personal relationships, and in our work-life? Where have we been judging ourselves or holding ourselves back? Where have we put off our goals or desires for “someday”? What self-perceptions have been inhibiting us from taking steps forward into new ways of thinking and choosing what is best for us?
At a time when we are faced with such cultural and societal change, we must see this time as an opportunity to embrace and work towards the possibility that what wasn’t working can be changed. For women to authentically emerge in their own glory to be and have what is rightfully theirs requires letting go of beliefs that don’t serve their spirit. To reemerge means to be seen again - and now, that permission is granted.
Kristen Bilodeau, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
As a Personal Development and Marriage Coach, Kristen Bilodeau leads women through their own personal journey of finding their voice, healing their marriage, and releasing their inner wild woman. As a woman who struggled in her own journey to self-awareness and truth in her life and marriage, Kristen uses the power of a woman’s story as the tool and catalyst for change, healing, and growth. She helps women uncover their truth through questioning and reflection so that they are able to be the creator of their experiences and thrive as the woman they were meant to be.
