Written by: Star Hayward, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Years ago, when I was learning how to develop an online coaching business, my coach at the time said something that stuck with me ever since:
"No one is going to find out about you if you're hiding out."
I thought this sounded like sage advice, and it made perfect sense to me. Being brand new to the online entrepreneurial industry at the time, however, I didn't have a point of reference to understand what she really meant until over the next couple of years where I found myself avoiding showing up publicly A LOT.
Speaking live on social media? Pitching to podcasts, summits, and editorials? All the while putting my stamp on everything that I did, said, posted... Yikes!! We were talking about another level of commitment here! Oh yes, I was up close and personal with the struggle of putting myself out there for the "world" to see as I was trying to wrap my mind around what it was going to take to truly succeed in the online game.
I'll never forget the moment when I realized that marketing myself online was like playing every role in the theatre: Actor, writer, director, costume designer, makeup artist, photographer, videographer, audio-visual technician, creative designer, ticket sales… am I leaving anything out??
Being a high achiever and tenacious, I took it all on by storm with my “yes I can” optimistic attitude. I wore all the hats (for probably too long) until I finally started hiring out, but what this phase of my business taught me was a set of skills that are invaluable to me today as a Business Coach- the most important one: how to look your fears in the face and show up anyway.
“The greatest myth about making yourself visible is that it's easy to do.”
If you've been at this a while, then you might also know that it isn't always easy. I don’t know an online entrepreneur who doesn’t feel imposter syndrome, comparison, fear of judgment, fear of rejection, or self-doubt.
Even if you’re a proficient Coach, content creator, copywriter, graphic designer, good with tech, comfortable on camera, and all the things, “emotional stuckness” can rear its ugly head more often than you'd like- especially when building momentum in your business is so crucial if you're going to truly elevate from start-up to business ownership.
Looking back to the beginning (when ignorance was such bliss) and what it took to get to where I am today, it’s quite remarkable to reflect on the sifting and sorting through my fears and doing the inner work to build the confidence I needed to create and expand my visibility as an Online Coach.
The months of procrastinating, hiding behind content creation, and hiding from exposing myself drove me (and my husband) crazy when finally, there came a day when I had enough of the madness. My desire for success became greater than my comfort zone that was holding me back. It was time to face the music and breakthrough once and for all.
We all have times when we feel frustrated, stuck, dissatisfied, agitated, high anxiety, or even depressed. Sometimes it can feel as though nothing’s working out that day, or that month for that matter.
When you're building a business, however, you can't afford to take entire days or weeks off (unless planned) while swirling down the toilet bowl of low vibration emotions that trigger self-sabotaging, self-minimizing behavior, which are the biggest killers to success. After all, no one will find out about you if you’re hiding out!
If this is resonating with you, here are a few steps to help you overcome these emotional traps:
1. Consider these moments as feedback, rather than using them to beat yourself up and feel even worse. What they’re telling you is that you’re feeling confused, disconnected from your inner power and that you're second-guessing yourself while getting pulled into not-enoughness beliefs and old patterns.
When negative emotions are present, it’s important to acknowledge them and take ownership of them, but not to wallow in them. It’s okay to be honest and simply say: I’m not feeling happy, clear, or inspired right now. Being honest about how you feel puts you that much closer to moving through.
2. Shift your state with simple actions such as drinking water, stretching, moving your body, taking a walk in nature, gratitude journaling, or listening to motivational audios… Anything that helps you feel good so that you can get back into a positive vibration quickly and reconnect with your primary intention, which is to show up and serve.
When you're in a positive state, you have access to clarity, confidence, your inner power, and creative flow. Inspiration, intuition, intelligence, and motivation are all turned on when you’re feeling centered and good. This is the aligned energy you want to create from.
3. Once in a positive state, commit to taking one action that will move you towards your goal of increasing your visibility. It may be doing a live video, reaching out to a podcast host, applying for a speaker summit, or reaching out for referrals. As you take this one action to move forward, you may find that you now have the confidence to take another action and another. Go for it!
Challenges, fears, self-doubt, heartbreak, pain- all of it's inevitable, it's what makes us human, and it's part of the duality that we live in. It’s how you meet these challenges that determine your ability to grow and keep showing up so that you can succeed in your pursuit of happiness, fulfillment, and freedom as a heart-centered entrepreneur.
Star Hayward, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine Star Hayward is a Spiritual Business & Leadership Coach with over two decades of combined expertise in online entrepreneurship, spiritual development, personal growth, and transformation. She’s the founder of Ascending Heart Academy and the creator of the Ascending Heart Business Mastery program.
Star empowers women entrepreneurs to become successful and profitable in designing a life and a business on their own terms, and become confident, feminine leaders to create the change that the world needs now. For a complimentary consultation, visit www.starhayward.com/apply.
