Written by: Cathy Spaas, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Receive million-dollar guidance from Kelly Rutherford, who ended up coaching the coach.
Kelly Rutherford is one of the strongest people I – Cathy Spaas – have met in the entertainment industry. Of course, interviewing a star like Kelly is a privilege on its own, but sharing her message of overcoming personal struggles, like being separated from your children with an ocean between you and finding yourself through these challenges, feels humbling and inspiring.
There are several conversations between Kelly and me on my YouTube show Spotlight Stress and my Instagram, so I’ll let you discover her story, wisdom and spotlight strategies in her own words by checking those out. In addition, I would love for you to discover something else we discussed behind the scenes.
An off-topic conversation
After a private session, we had an off-topic conversation about the pregnancy of my second child, a baby girl. I already had a son of a year and a half, and I was nervous about welcoming a girl into our little bubble. For some reason, the idea of a girl scared me, even though I was excited to have her be part of our family and couldn’t wait to meet her. It feels like I connected with her energy and could feel her force to be reckoned with. Since our son is a very sensitive soul, I think the overwhelm scared me a bit for him. 😊
So when I expressed that concern to Kelly, she gave me the most beautiful reply I could have wished for. Up until this day, where my daughter is a year and a half herself now and the absolute whirlwind we expected her to be, I keep reminiscing about Kelly’s words:
‘Tell your son that his baby sister is joining him in your family because she wants to be with him.’
Reframing the situation
This simple sentence changed the entire perspective of the situation from ‘us having another baby’ to ‘his little sister who was coming especially for him’. Changing perspective is one of my ground rules when working with high-ticket coaching clients. It’s one of the first strategies I would teach them to make their own.
Isn’t it interesting how you can live by certain teachings, and then when something unknown is about to happen, your brain will trigger you towards concern anyway? That’s what I call: new level, new devil.
Spotlight Stress
Every time you enter a new playfield, it will feel uncomfortable, may worry you, and maybe even generate anxiety. Living life in the spotlight amplifies that even more due to the extra pressure it brings. The number 1 strategy for situations like these is acknowledging that it is supposed to make you feel this way, accepting the discomfort, and doing it anyway.
There is no: when I’m better; when I feel more confident; when the moon aligns in a better freaking way with the stars or whatever bullshit you like to tell yourself while holding yourself back. You only feel less insecure and more capable by doing it and by allowing yourself to grow along the journey, just like everyone else in the entire world who wants to become skilled and confident in anything.
So here is my loving guidance to you whenever you feel doubt overcome you:
Reframe your perspective.
You had a vision or a desire in the first place. Bring that back to your attention, and imagine how you want to feel while “being there”. Then, pivot the situation until you find a point of view that serves your higher vision. Finding your win can be the insight you need for the road ahead. Now go, enjoy life with all its beauty and disasters. Permit yourself to shine. And if you feel you need practical, hands-on guidance with that, or a speaker on the topic to inspire your community; I’ve got you. I’m opening up my calendar for limited spots (after selection) for an exclusive inspiration call. Apply for your spot here.
Follow me on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, Twitter, Pinterest, and Youtube, or visit my website for more info!
Cathy Spaas, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Cathy Spaas is a world-class expert and speaker, who advocates the superpowers that come along with being an HSP (highly sensitive person). She started competing with horses at a young age, and due to over-demand and high pressure, she wasn’t able to perform for a long time. Cathy developed her ‘Claim-your-Shine’-modality to shift from suffering and surviving to thriving. She created the term ‘Spotlight Stress’, and has been guiding artists and performers to their inner sparkle ever since.
