Written by: Aida Dryjanski, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
"You're always with yourself, so you might as well enjoy the company." —Diane Von Furstenberg.
When I found this quote, it got me thinking about the significance of our self-esteem and self-worth. Such wise words made me contemplate the meaning of our own value and appreciation of ourselves as human beings. Moreover, considering how numerous individuals with low self-worth see the quality of their lives affected, they can now appreciate the significance of improving their emotions.
Let me ask you.
Have you ever thought about how much do you like your own company?
Do you enjoy your own company?
Do you recognize your own value?
Do you love yourself?
Do you practice self-care?
Do you compliment yourself?
What do you really think about yourself?
Let us begin by explaining what self-esteem and self-worth are since we may get confused between the similarities they share, and even though they are not the same, they do complement each other.
Like Dr. Christina Hibbert explains: Self-esteem is what we think and feel and believe about ourselves. Self-worth is recognizing ‘I am greater than all of those things.’ It is a deep knowing that I am of value, that I am loveable, necessary to this life, and of incomprehensible worth.” (2013).
In other words, self-esteem relies on external factors such as accomplishments and achievements and how your thoughts, beliefs, and feelings about yourself affect your self-esteem. On the other hand, self-worth relies on internal factors like acknowledging your own worth and having your own internal awareness radar indicating how much you accept your value as a human being.
At one time or another, all of us have struggled with our own feelings of worthiness. And yes, it is particularly important to recognize your own strengths and attributes. What is more, you must appreciate and empathize with yourself those times when you make mistakes, when you fail, or when things are not working out as you had expected. During these times, you should nurture yourself by providing self-care and having compassionate behaviors towards yourself.
Nowadays -more than ever-, you should understand the importance of improving your self-worth to avoid the consequences of seeing the quality of your life affected and diminished.
What are some qualities of someone with low self-worth? Those individuals are exceedingly critical of themselves; they tend to ignore their positive qualities, use negative words to describe themselves, do not believe in compliments, think they are inferior, try to be perfectionists, and are usually sad, angry, or depressed.
What are some of the consequences of having low self-worth on the quality of a person’s life? Those persons usually experience relationship problems, are afraid of trying new things, do not take risks, are afraid of being judged, their resilience is low, they have a hard time coping with challenges, do not practice self-care, and they do not practice self-care may even harm themselves.
Moreover, it is important to realize that some of the things that do not determine your self-worth are your bank account, looks, or popularity.
Let me be clear. Those factors do not define how valuable or worthy you are.
What truly matters is what kind of values, ideals, standards, and principles you uphold in your life.
Values and beliefs like kindness, respect, tolerance, compassion, empathy, thoughtfulness, authenticity, caring, and consideration for others.
There will be times when you will try to sabotage yourself when your inner voice starts firing up criticisms that remind you of your flaws. Every time that happens, every time you notice that your inner voice is criticizing and reminding you about your faults, every time you notice that your self-esteem needs a boost, that is the time when you need to challenge yourself and find what steps you may take to help improve your self-worth.
Keep in mind that no matter what, you are always a worthy and valuable human being.
Stop the negative self-talk.
Have you ever realized how much time you spend thinking about your flaws instead of appreciating your strengths? Tell me, how would you describe yourself? What are the labels you give yourself? Have you noticed that most of the time, the negatives outweigh the positives?
The downside is that by labeling yourself, you are changing your own perception and your self-esteem. From now on, pay attention to your self-talk. Be aware of how you talk to yourself and what words you are using.
Start by helping your inner critic support your self-esteem and self-worth. Watch your language and use positive and encouraging words. Challenge the way you think and the way you view yourself. Recognize your attributes and positive qualities. Start praising and clapping yourself more often.
Accept your flaws and focus on your strengths.
As human beings, we all have shortcomings that we would like to change. First, work toward being humble and acknowledge your flaws.
By accepting and recognizing your own limitations, you are saying, “my faults do not define me,” “I will not allow my faults to control my life.” And, by doing so, you are giving more power to your strengths and your attributes. You are finally empowering yourself.
I suggest you practice the following exercise to reinforce your qualities.
Write a list of all your personal strengths, your qualities, your talents, and abilities. Read your list and be joyful and grateful for all of them. Furthermore, rejoice and celebrate your accomplishments, your achievements, and your successes.
From now on, accept your flaws but always, emphasize your strengths!
Do things you enjoy and spend time with people that make you happy.
Once again, write a list of the things you like to do, and every day try to do at least one thing on your list.
Ask yourself, What brings you joy? What makes you smile? And make sure you carry out those things.
Likewise, do not waste your precious time with people that do not respect you or treat you like you deserve.
Life is short, spend your time doing things you enjoy and be with people you like and who appreciate and truly care about you. At the end of the day, you will feel more motivated and inspired to follow your dreams.
Take care of yourself.
It is never too late to start practicing self-care. By giving yourself some love and appreciation, you are telling the world: I am worthy!
Create a daily self-care routine. Engage in activities that promote your well-being. Exercise, read a book, nourish your body, meditate, grab a cup of coffee, get enough sleep.
Self-care means focusing on your needs. By practicing self-care, you will feel better about yourself, and you will reflect that feeling in your work, at home, and in your relationships.
Accept and encourage yourself; remember, nobody is perfect.
Give yourself a break. We all have times when we are feeling down and uneasy. Do not be hard on yourself. Nobody is perfect. Pay attention to your blessings. Cheer yourself.
The most important thing is to remember to be kind and compassionate with yourself.
Never allow being defined by people’s opinions or external circumstances. Focus on your faith and confidence.
By accepting yourself as you are -despite your flaws, weaknesses, and limitations-, you are acknowledging the real worth of who you are — right here, right now, at this present moment.
Never compare yourself with others.
You are walking your own path. Sometimes the reason you struggle with insecurity is that you compare yourself with everyone else. Forget what everyone else is doing. Your life is about yourself breaking your own limits to empower yourself.
"A healthy self-love means we have no compulsion to justify to ourselves or others why we take vacations, why we sleep late, why we buy new shoes, why we spoil ourselves from time to time. We feel comfortable doing things which add quality and beauty to life." —Andrew Matthews
As I mentioned before, low self-esteem and self-worth can negatively affect every area of your life, including your relationships, job, and health.
But keep in mind that every day you have a choice to change and challenge yourself.
It is important to believe, deep down, that you can change.
Change does not necessarily happen easily or quickly, but it will happen.
By creating a healthy sense of self-worth, you will benefit more from inner stability. You will become brighter, more positive, and more confident.
By feeling worthy, you will develop and expand your self-love, feel more deserving of good things in life, and feel more motivated and inspired to focus and achieve your goals.
Louise L. Hay was so right when she wrote:
"Remember, you have been criticizing yourself for years, and it hasn't worked. Try approving of yourself and see what happens." —Louise L. Hay
If you want to find out how high or low your “self-worth,” send me an email here and just request the Self-Worth Assessment.
If you are tired to hear that you are not enough.
If you are ready to believe in yourself.
If you are ready to design the life, you deserve.
If you are ready to reclaim your voice.
If you are ready to finally live with purpose.
If you are ready to experience change both professionally and personally,
And you are ready to get results…
If you are ready for guidance and support.’
For a 30-minute Free Consultation, Click Here.
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Aida Dryjanski, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Aida Dryjanski is a Business and Mindset Coach and Consultant. She holds a BA in Advertising and Communication. She began working for Advertising Companies and a Publishing House, as well as Affiliate Marketing. After her mother suffered 12 years of a debilitating and painful illness, Aida decided that her mission was helping others going through life-shattering events. She holds certifications in Mindfulness, Focusing, Psychosomatic Integration, Emotional Intelligence, and a Virtual Coach Graduate. Aida has her own coaching and consulting practice. However, there was a time when she struggled with her self-esteem and self-confidence. She felt lost and afraid. Until one day, she decided to change. And she did. Through lots of inner work, self-development programs, live workshops, and more. Now, she gives back. Her passion is helping women to renew, grow, and transform themselves, their businesses, and their income at any age. She does this through one-to-one sessions, group sessions, online courses, programs, and more. Aida not only helps her clients navigate and strengthen their mindset and emotions, but she gives them guidance, strategies, and whole-heartedly support. Her clients emerge renewed, transformed, and ready to achieve their next level in their personal and professional life. Aida knows and believes that there is greatness in every person.
