Written by: Vasundhra Gupta, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
When I was starting as a new life coach, one of the first tools I learned was to help myself and my clients discover our Core Values. This tool is a beautiful and challenging self-discovery process that invites us to narrow down our top 3-5 values from a long (and sometimes daunting) list of meaningful words. Today, I want to share what happens when you keep revisiting this exercise periodically and rediscovering your core values.
First things first – Why is it essential to discover our core values?
I’d like to emphasize the importance of this exercise by sharing the story of a client who made some huge (and I mean really huge) life decisions the moment she recognized what her core values were. So, this is a highly career-driven woman who worked 60+ hours on any given week. She was passionate about her work but her health began to tank. It became harder and harder for her to keep up with the expectations that would have led her to a big promotion. In one of our sessions, we sat down and assessed her core values. It turned out, she was not living out of even one of them! This is what transpired: she resigned from her job, started booking multiple appointments to cater to her health, and consciously started setting relationship boundaries. Through this journey, she realized that as much as she was driven by her career and the money it made her, it wasn’t fulfilling enough. It was also not enough for her to come back at the end of the day feeling tired, with no room for herself in her own life because she had been so busy looking after everyone else’s needs, including her job. If you look closely enough at this scenario, you can tell that my client’s core values were health, freedom, and connection. But she had been pursuing something along the lines of responsibility, security, reputation, etc. In other words, she could now see clearly that these were “good to have” values, but not her core ones. And she set out to change that. A year later, as we continue working together, her ability to stand up for her needs (physical, mental, and emotional) has significantly improved. She has more time and is more intentional on how she uses it. And there are zero regrets for letting go of a decade-long career to create something more sustainable. Now that you understand why core value assessment is important, let’s explore what the long-term impact of this assessment is.
Now, let’s talk about rediscovering our core values & why that’s important
To this date, I cherish revisiting the values list to see where I stand with it. And something interesting transpired this year: my core values changed.
They used to be purpose, connection, and growth.
They have now evolved to health, authenticity, and growth.
How has this change come to be?
The more I healed my deep-rooted wound of people-pleasing tendencies, I realized that to feel connected to someone, I need to feel like I’m allowed to be in the relationship just being myself. So, connection became a subpart of a larger goal for authenticity.
Similarly, my relationship with the word purpose had become outward. I was constantly measuring my impact on the world and would notice my heart sinking when the numbers didn’t match or cross the month before. I would also judge myself for not living a life of purpose if I wasn’t writing articles and coaching my clients.
So I now consider the word growth to be a better reframe for myself. Personally, it feels more encompassing in what I see for myself and others. And it’s no longer limited to just my professional impact. Growth can be seen and explored across every aspect of life! Nested within are other values such as purpose and healing.
Also, I noticed that I developed workaholic tendencies that would drain my mind and body. As I healed through these tendencies, it became clear that for me to do anything or be anyone, my health would have precedence.
Similarly, you might notice that if you once pursued happiness, today joy feels more all-encompassing. Or the word achievement might be replaced with meaningful work. There’s no right or wrong choice- they are all simply an indication of the growth and transformation we undergo.
Concluding thoughts
As we continue to focus on self-development work, it is natural for our core values to change. This is because some of our values come from our limiting beliefs, traumas, and what we “think” is right for us. As we further introspect and live a life of alignment, these values might shift or change altogether. And we need to be able to recognize what we now stand for, as we evolve.
I’m excited for you to see the transformation that happens not only when you discover your core values, but when you keep rediscovering them!
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Vasundhra Gupta, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Vasundhra Gupta is the founder of My Spiritual Shenanigans, a unique resource for mental, emotional, and spiritual growth. Her work as a writer & life coach has touched over half a million lives worldwide. This journey began when Vasundhra saw 11:11 on the clock and mysterious things started happening to her. Ever since, she is on a mission to help herself and others create a life full of purpose, connection, and growth.
