Jodie, founder of Flourish Wellbeing, specialises in women's health and matrescence, offering global coaching to empower mothers through their transformative journey.
Motherhood is often portrayed as a beautiful and fulfilling experience, a dream come true for many women. But what’s less talked about is the profound identity shift that accompanies this life change. Becoming a mother isn’t just about welcoming a new life into the world. It’s about rediscovering, and sometimes completely redefining, who you are. This journey can be unexpected, challenging, and deeply transformative.
For many women, motherhood comes with certain expectations, a sense of what it will be like to care for a child and still maintain other aspects of their lives. However, the reality often presents a different picture. The demands of motherhood, from sleepless nights to endless tasks, can lead to a feeling of losing oneself. Suddenly, you’re not just ‘you’ anymore; you’re someone’s mum. And while this new identity is precious, it can also overshadow other parts of who you are.
The grief of losing your previous identity is real. You may find yourself longing for the freedom and spontaneity you once had, the career goals you were pursuing, or even the simple joys of uninterrupted time for yourself. Yet, this shift isn’t just about loss. It’s also about transformation. The values that once guided your life may no longer feel as important, and new values may emerge, rooted in the love and responsibility you now carry as a mother.
Values re-imagined in motherhood
Motherhood often prompts a deep reassessment of what truly matters. The career ambitions that once defined you might take a backseat to the desire to be present with your children. The social life you once prioritized may now seem less important as you focus on building a nurturing home environment. This shift in values isn’t something to resist; it’s a natural part of your growth as a person and as a mother.
Embracing these changes allows you to step into your new role with grace and authenticity. It’s about acknowledging that your priorities have shifted, and that’s okay. This is a time to redefine what success and happiness mean to you, not just as a mother but as a whole person.
Navigating the chaos and reconnecting with yourself
Amidst the chaos of motherhood, it’s easy to lose sight of your own needs and desires. However, self-care is not a luxury; it’s a necessity. Taking time to care for yourself is essential in helping you navigate this identity shift. It doesn’t have to be grand gestures. A few minutes of quiet reflection in the morning, a short walk, or even a moment to breathe deeply can make a difference.
Reclaiming joy and spontaneity is another crucial step. Motherhood doesn’t mean you have to give up the things that make you feel alive. Perhaps you loved dancing before you became a mother, why not bring that back into your life, even if it’s just in your living room? Maybe you miss the creativity of dressing up or the fun of spontaneous outings. Find ways to weave these pleasures back into your daily routine, no matter how small.
The role of the redefine you program in this journey
This journey of self-discovery and redefinition is at the heart of my Redefine You Program. It’s designed to help mothers navigate these identity shifts with intention and support. Through the program, we focus on redefining your values, incorporating self-care into your life, and finding a balance that honours both your role as a mother and your individuality.
The program provides practical tools, exercises and reflections to help you reconnect with who you are outside of motherhood. It’s a space where you can explore your strengths, rediscover your passions, and create a vision for your life that aligns with your new values.
Embracing the new you
Motherhood is not an endpoint; it’s a chapter in your ongoing journey of self-discovery. Yes, it changes you, but it doesn’t mean losing who you are. Instead, it offers an opportunity to become more—to expand your identity in ways you never imagined. You can be both a dedicated mother and a fulfilled, whole person.
To start this journey of redefining yourself, I encourage you to take a moment to reflect on your current values, strengths, and passions. Write them down. Then, consider how you can start aligning your daily actions with these values. Maybe it’s setting aside time each week for something that brings you joy, or perhaps it’s redefining your idea of success to include the small wins in your day-to-day life.
The journey through the identity shift in motherhood is both challenging and rewarding. Embracing this new phase of life requires patience, self-love, and, often, a helping hand. Remember, it’s okay to seek support as you navigate these changes. You’re not just becoming a mother—you’re becoming a more complete and fulfilled version of yourself.
Motherhood is a journey of redefining who you are, and it’s one that you don’t have to walk alone. With intention, support, and a little bit of grace, you can navigate this identity shift and emerge stronger, more vibrant, and ready to embrace the beautiful, multifaceted woman you are becoming.
Please check out my Redefine you program if you feel called to do so. I would be honoured to walk along side you in this journey of exciting self-discovery now that you are a mother.
Read more from Jodie Abraham
Jodie Abraham, Women's Health & Matrescence Coach
Jodie isn't just a Nutrition, Health, and Wellness Coach – she's a compassionate advocate for mothers. With certifications as a Mama Rising Facilitator, Motherhood Coach, and Women's Health and Hormone Coach, Jodie brings expertise and empathy to her practice. As a mother of two who has experienced postnatal depletion and depression herself, she intimately understands the challenges of motherhood, offering non-judgemental support and practical guidance to mothers on their transformative journeys. She deeply believes all mothers deserve to thrive and flourish in motherhood.
