Written by Janie Terrazas, The Mindfulness Coach
Janie Terrazas is a Mindfulness Coach and creator of PazMesa, a self-mastery guide to help you access inner peace, joy, vitality, and prosperity through mindful living and unconditional loving.
In a culture that often equates busyness with productivity and success, the concept of play can seem frivolous, especially to those who are highly driven. However, emerging research highlights that incorporating play into our lives is not just beneficial; it's essential for creativity, health, and maintaining strong relationships.
The health benefits of play
Play isn't just for children. For adults, engaging in playful activities can significantly reduce stress levels and increase overall well-being. A study published by the American Journal of Play found that play can lower cortisol levels, the hormone associated with stress, and improve brain function. This relaxation and stimulation of the brain are crucial for maintaining mental health and cognitive sharpness.
Additionally, play has been linked to improved immune system responses. A playful lifestyle can boost the body's production of white blood cells, which helps fight off diseases. This link between play and health suggests that taking time to relax and enjoy yourself can actually be seen as a preventive measure.
Boosting creativity through play
Play is also a powerful catalyst for creativity. Driven human beings often find themselves in a rut, facing mental blocks that stifle innovation. Playful activities stimulate the brain, encouraging new ways of thinking and problem-solving. According to research from the National Institute for Play, play engages the prefrontal cortex, responsible for our highest-level cognitive functions. This engagement can lead to unexpected insights and innovative solutions, vital for both personal and professional development.
Enhancing relationships with play
On a relational level, play fosters deeper, more authentic connections with others. Playful communication and activities build trust and empathy, important components of healthy relationships. Whether with family, friends, or coworkers, shared playful moments create bonds that are both emotionally satisfying and supportive. These bonds are particularly vital for those who may otherwise prioritize work over personal interactions.
Overcoming the barriers to play
Despite the well-documented benefits of play, many adults struggle to incorporate playful activities into their daily routines. This resistance often stems from a mindset formed in childhood, viewing play as unproductive. Societal pressures to constantly achieve can further compound this, making it difficult to justify time spent on seemingly unfruitful activities. Overcoming this barrier requires a fundamental shift in perspective: recognizing play as a vital component of a well-rounded, healthy life.
Childhood conditioning and play
From a young age, children naturally engage in imaginative play, which is important for their development. Unfortunately, this curiosity and wonder are often misunderstood or undervalued by adults. Messages that it is frivolous or a distraction from more serious pursuits like academics or chores can evolve into ingrained beliefs that label play as detrimental. When adults witness children lost in imaginative or wild pretend play, their own discomfort or unresolved issues may surface. This discomfort can lead to reactions that shame, condemn, or ridicule these expressions of creativity. Such moments impart lasting impressions on children, teaching them that their natural inclination towards curiosity and play is somehow inappropriate or unwelcome.
The lasting impressions of early messages
As these children grow into adults, early experiences manifest as a deep-seated hesitation towards or discomfort with play. Adverse thoughts and feelings of anxiousness, guilt, or shame are commonly connected to this uneasiness. This is something many of my clients can relate to. Activities once seen as joyful become perceived as silly, irresponsible and a “waste of time.” To overcome these barriers, it's necessary to address these childhood wounds and challenge our subconscious beliefs.
A mindfulness coach's insight: The struggle with play and rest
As a mindfulness coach, I often work with clients who are driven, go-getters, and high achievers. It's more common than not that they struggle with play and rest without guilt. I ask them, "What do you do for fun on the regular? When was the last time you played or truly rested without guilt or your mind racing? Can you recall the last time you were fully immersed in the now moment for an extended amount of time?” Sharing examples typically doesn’t come easy. This is why play and self-restoration are the first areas we assess and focus on. Awareness of these roadblocks is crucial to curating a more harmonious lifestyle.
Understanding parentification
I've also noticed a correlation between those who exude uptight, rigid, controlling personas and the resistance to making time for play and restoration. This is true for most workaholics as well. It also traces back to their upbringing. A significant factor is the phenomenon of being "parentified" as a child.
Parentification is a term in child psychology and family dynamics where a child takes on roles and responsibilities typically reserved for parents. This can happen in two forms: instrumental parentification, where the child is expected to handle physical tasks and responsibilities, and emotional parentification, where the child is expected to provide emotional support to parents or siblings.
When parentified children often miss out on their childhood experiences of play, exploration, and carefree joy. Instead, they grow up feeling the weight of adult responsibilities, leading to a heightened sense of duty and a diminished capacity for spontaneous playfulness. This dynamic shapes behavior and mindsets well into adulthood, often resulting in overly serious and structured people struggling to let go and savor moments of lightheartedness.
Reclaiming childlike wonder
Reclaiming a sense of childlike excitement, wonder, and awe can be particularly challenging. The ingrained belief that play is an unproductive “waste of time” needs to be consciously addressed and reprogrammed. By acknowledging the impact of their upbringing and the responsibilities they shouldered prematurely, individuals can begin to understand their current walls around play.
They can also begin to break free from the constant cycle of achievement and external validations, so they can rediscover a sense of inner wholeness, peace, presence, creativity, and richer relationships.
Steps toward healing
Healing from the effects of parentification involves several steps:
Acknowledgment: Recognize and validate the responsibilities you carried as a child and how they have shaped your adult behaviors and attitudes toward play.
Self-compassion: Practice self-compassion by understanding that your discomfort with play and relaxation are a result of your upbringing, not a personal failing.
Permission to play: Give yourself explicit permission to engage in play. Understand that these activities are not only beneficial but necessary for your overall well-being.
Mindful exploration: Engage in activities that bring you joy and allow you to experience a sense of wonder and excitement. This could be anything from exploring nature to engaging in creative arts or trying something totally new.
Therapeutic support: Consider seeking support from a therapist or coach who can help you navigate the process of healing and reclaiming your right to play and relax.
How to start incorporating play and rest into your life
Identify playful activities that resonate with you and lifts your spirit: Whether it's painting, dancing, exploring nature, playing a musical instrument, or engaging in sports, find what feels like play to you.
Identify restorative activities that help you reset your energy and mood levels: Reading, listening to a guided meditation, getting a massage, doing yoga, grounding, or being still. Find what calms and balances you internally.
Schedule time for playing and resting: Just as you would a meeting, scheduling play or rest, even for just 15 minutes, ensures that it gets the attention it deserves.
Mindful tidbit
Keeping a journal of how you feel after offering yourself time for play or rest is a useful way to gain subconscious insights about yourself. If you choose to make notes, be honest with what comes up, especially any inner critical thoughts or feelings you may experience. Notice what you feel in your body and witness the sensations. When you commit to these self-care practices, you eventually rewire a different mindset and reshape your brain's neural pathways, allowing you to be immersed in the joy and peace that come from getting lost in play or relaxation. The goal is to dive into them minus any anxiousness, guilt, or shame.
Transforming perspectives
Relearning how to play, and let loose is a transformative process that enhances both personal and professional aspects of life. Embracing play as a positive and indispensable act requires a conscious effort to shift perspective. By viewing play not as a distraction but as a necessary component for mental, emotional, spiritual and physical well-being, one can unlock their full potential in all areas of life.
I double dog dare you to practice play regularly and watch as it becomes a powerhouse for accessing your PazMesa (Translation: Peace Within).
9 Simple ways to hack play into your day
1. Mini breaks
Take short breaks throughout the day to engage in a fun activity. This could be doodling, solving a quick puzzle, or watching something that makes you laugh.
2. Gamify tasks
Turn mundane tasks into a game. Set a timer and see how much you can accomplish before it goes off, or compete with a colleague to see who can finish first.
3. Walking meetings
Hold meetings while walking outside. This change of environment can make the meeting feel more relaxed and enjoyable.
4. Desk toys
Keep small toys like stress balls, fidget spinners, yo-yos, molding clay, or desk puzzles at your workspace. Playing with these can provide a quick mental break.
5. Creative outlets
Incorporate creative activities like drawing, writing, or playing a musical instrument into your day. These activities can be done in short bursts and provide a mental refresh. I have a harmonica. They’re fun to play and easy to carry.
6. Social play
Engage with colleagues or friends in fun activities. This could be a quick round of a trivia game, trash can basketball, or a light-hearted challenge.
7. Exercise playfully
Choose fun forms of exercise like dancing, hula hooping, playing a sport, or doing a quick workout that feels more like play than work.
8. Nature breaks
Spend time outdoors, even if it’s just a few minutes in a nearby park. Nature has a way of invigorating and refreshing the mind.
9. Playful learning
Engage in learning activities that are enjoyable. This could be listening to a fun podcast, watching an educational yet entertaining video, or reading an interesting book.
Incorporating these playful elements into your daily routine can help make your day more enjoyable and productive, even with a busy schedule.
Visit my site to be part of my mindfulness community and subscribe to my YouTube channel for more insights on mindful living and unconditional loving.
Read more from Janie Terrazas
Janie Terrazas, The Mindfulness Coach
Janie Terrazas, known as The Mindfulness Coach, transformed her media career into a life coaching and wellness advocacy mission after a spiritual awakening in 2011. As the creator of the PazMesa Self Mastery Program and the force behind Rise Above TV, she fosters balance and mindfulness in others. Her triumphs and trials deeply shape her coaching, as she helps clients address stress, trauma, and safe relationship building. Janie combines spiritual depth with actionable strategies to guide individuals toward a joyful, vital life. Her coaching transcends conventional methods, empowering clients to find peace and purpose within. Janie's empathetic and innovative approaches offer a safe self-discovery roadmap to authentic living and loving.
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