Heidi Albritton is a dynamic Coach & Trainer, with over 20 years of experience in operational excellence and transformative coaching. Notably, she pioneered Mindfulness coaching at a global non-profit, contributing to the creation and facilitation of an organization-wide Mindfulness & Resilience program.
As leaders, our ability to inspire, guide, and empower others hinges not only on strategy and decision-making but also on emotional intelligence. Emotions, whether consciously recognized or not, influence every decision we make, every conversation we have, and every goal we pursue. Yet, many leaders overlook the profound impact of managing emotions—not just in others but within themselves.
The concept of "noticing the spark before the flame," rooted in the work of psychologist Paul Ekman, offers leaders a practical and transformative way to enhance their emotional awareness. This approach helps leaders recognize emotions as they arise, creating the space to respond thoughtfully rather than react impulsively. By mastering this skill, leaders can foster stronger relationships, make more strategic decisions, and improve their overall impact.
The leadership case for emotional awareness
Success as a leader demands high emotional resilience. From navigating complex interpersonal dynamics to making decisions under pressure, emotions can either serve as powerful allies or undermine effectiveness.
Why emotional awareness matters in leadership
1. Improves decision-making
Emotions, when unchecked, can distort our perception of reality. For instance, fear of failure might lead to overly cautious decisions, while frustration can push leaders into unnecessary risks. Recognizing emotions early helps leaders approach decisions with clarity.
2. Builds trust and connection
Emotional outbursts or lack of empathy can erode trust among teams. Conversely, leaders who manage their emotions effectively can foster environments of psychological safety where team members feel respected and understood.
3. Strengthens resilience
Leadership inevitably involves setbacks and challenges. Emotional awareness helps leaders process adversity constructively, maintaining their focus on long-term goals.
4. Enhances influence
Leaders set the emotional tone for their teams. By modeling emotional intelligence, leaders inspire similar behavior in their teams, creating a ripple effect that benefits the entire organization.
The science behind emotional awareness
Paul Ekman’s research on emotions and facial expressions has shown that emotions arise quickly in response to stimuli, often before we’re fully aware of them. These emotions are adaptive, helping us respond to threats or opportunities. However, in modern workplaces, the same emotional triggers that helped our ancestors survive can lead to unintended consequences, such as conflict, stress, or poor decision-making.
Studies in neuroscience support this idea. The prefrontal cortex, responsible for rational thinking, often lags behind the amygdala, the brain’s emotional center. This lag creates a brief moment where emotions take the driver’s seat before logic kicks in. Recognizing this moment—the "spark"—is key to managing emotional responses effectively.
Noticing the spark: Practical steps for leaders
Here’s how leaders can develop the skill of noticing the spark before it becomes a flame, channeling emotions into constructive actions:
1. Label the emotion
Ekman’s research highlights the power of naming emotions. When leaders feel an emotional response arising, they should pause and identify it: frustration, anxiety, excitement, etc. Studies show that labeling emotions activates the brain’s logical regions, reducing the intensity of the emotion.
Action step:
Practice emotional labeling by keeping a journal. Reflect on the day’s emotional moments, noting the triggers, emotions, and outcomes.
2. Pause before reacting
Emotional reactions often feel urgent, but a brief pause can prevent impulsive decisions. This pause creates a buffer, allowing leaders to assess whether their initial reaction aligns with their values and goals.
Action step:
Use the STOP technique:
Stop.
Take a breath.
Observe your feelings and situation.
Proceed thoughtfully.
3. Reflect on triggers
Understanding what triggers emotional responses can help leaders anticipate and manage them. For example, a leader who becomes defensive during criticism might reflect on why this reaction occurs and develop strategies to stay open and receptive.
Action step:
Keep a log of emotional triggers and patterns. Reflect on how these triggers impact decision-making and interactions.
4. Reconnect with goals
Emotions often hijack our focus, pushing us toward short-term relief at the expense of long-term goals. Leaders should ask themselves: “Is this response helping or hindering my objectives?”
Action step:
During emotionally charged moments, revisit your key goals or values. Let these guide your response rather than the emotion itself.
5. Cultivate empathy and compassion
Understanding emotions in yourself is the first step to understanding them in others. Empathetic leaders are better equipped to navigate team dynamics, resolve conflicts, and inspire collaboration.
Action step:
During interactions, practice active listening. Reflect on the emotions behind others’ words and actions to build deeper connections.
Journaling is a powerful tool for growth
To help leaders develop emotional awareness, I always encourage them to try journaling and documenting situations that have elicited an emotional response. This is a great way to learn from our mistakes, to identify patterns in our behavior, and to ensure we are better prepared to deal with future ‘triggering’ events. Here are a few simple prompts to guide you through this journaling process:
Describe emotional episodes, including the triggers and emotions experienced.
Note physical sensations associated with the emotion, fostering mindfulness.
Record thoughts and behavioral tendencies.
Reflect on how the episode influenced their actions and goals.
Identify lessons learned and strategies for future growth.
Using this journaling exercise regularly helps leaders uncover patterns in their emotional responses and equips them with insights to make intentional, values-driven choices.
Building emotionally intelligent organizations
Leadership is a human endeavor, and emotions are inseparable from that experience. By noticing the spark before the flame, leaders can harness the power of emotions to drive positive change rather than letting emotions dictate their actions.
Imagine a workplace where leaders pause to consider the emotional tone of their decisions, where teams feel valued and supported, and where challenges are met with resilience and clarity. Developing emotional awareness isn’t just a personal journey—it’s a commitment to leading with authenticity, empathy, and impact.
As Daniel Goleman, a thought leader in emotional intelligence, says, “Great leadership works through emotions.” By embracing the practice of noticing the spark, today’s leaders can rise to new heights of effectiveness, creating workplaces where both people and businesses thrive.
Ready to lead with awareness?
For leaders ready to enhance their emotional intelligence, the journey begins with awareness. Start by reflecting on your own emotional patterns using the strategies outlined here. Practice naming your emotions, pausing before reacting, and aligning your responses with your goals.
Noticing the spark before the flame isn’t about suppressing emotions—it’s about understanding and channeling them constructively. By doing so, you’ll not only strengthen your leadership but also create a lasting, positive impact on your team and organization.
Heidi Albritton, Mindfulness & High Performance Coach
Heidi Albritton is a dynamic Coach & Trainer, with over 20 years of experience in operational excellence and transformative coaching. Notably, she pioneered Mindfulness coaching at a global non-profit, contributing to the creation and facilitation of an organization-wide Mindfulness & Resilience program. A certified expert in Corporate-based Mindfulness, Advanced Enneagram Dynamics and High Performance Coaching, she's dedicated to helping individuals uncover their potential, manage their emotions, and lead a life of impact. Heidi's personal journey, marked by resilience in the face of Lyme's disease and cancer, fuels her passion for mindfulness and authenticity. Her mantra, "Change your mind, change your life,"
