Nadija is a multi-award-winning trauma and empowerment specialist with a double diploma in hypnotherapy, mind coaching, and online therapy. She is also a Reiki master and a grief educator, and she has been trained by an international grief specialist and best-selling author, David Kessler. Nadija is also an end-of-life doula.
As we enter the festive and holiday season, we see and meet numerous people who are very excited about this time of year. But what about us if this is a time we are experiencing grief? Navigating grief during the festive season can be deeply challenging, as the holidays often amplify feelings of loss and longing. The festive season, traditionally a time of joy and togetherness, can feel especially heavy for those who are grieving. In a world bustling with celebrations, lights, and gatherings, grief does not pause, nor does it adjust its intensity to align with any season or holiday. Instead, it quietly follows us, lingering even as festivities begin. The juxtaposition of grief and joy may seem impossible to reconcile. Yet, navigating the festive season while honouring your pain, your memories and your healing is possible and in time, it can even become a source of strength and comfort. Though this path may feel overwhelming, remember that grief doesn’t have to be carried alone.
This time of year, steeped in traditions and memories, may feel overwhelming when a loved one is no longer present to share in these moments. Acknowledging these emotions is essential; grief deserves its space, even amidst holiday cheer. Allowing yourself to feel the sadness, while also embracing self-care, can help create a balanced path through this season.
Grief has no calendar: Embracing our unique path
Grief has no schedule other than a schedule of its own; it does not subside because the calendar flips to a season of lights and festivities. Just as no two lives are the same, neither are two journeys through grief. Your experience is as unique as the relationship you have lost. Accepting this is vital to navigating this season in a way that serves you best. No rulebook or seasonal tradition should dictate how you feel, nor should societal expectations push you toward ‘getting on with it’ or ‘moving on.’ You might feel pressure to join the celebrations, to smile through the pain, or to meet others’ expectations of joy. However, your grieving process is yours, and it deserves respect, patience, and the space to breathe. Your grief deserves to be acknowledged whatever the season or time of year.
As you embrace this season in the way that feels right for you, consider this powerful and empowering quote: "Grief is not a sign of weakness, nor a lack of faith it is the price of love." Let these words remind you that your pain is a reflection of the love that still exists, even after a loss. This understanding can be the foundation upon which you build strength to find your way through the holidays, honouring both your grief and all the love that remains.
Tips for navigating the festive season while grieving
While the path may be challenging, there are ways to approach the season that can offer comfort, hope, and even moments of light. Here are some compassionate strategies to help you find balance between honouring your grief and participating in the world around you:
Set boundaries and honour your loss
It is very much okay to say no. If certain traditions or gatherings feel too painful, do not force yourself to participate. Boundaries are a form of self-respect and self-care. Decline invitations that feel overwhelming and surround yourself only with people who understand and respect your need for space.
Maybe you want a quieter holiday this year, or perhaps only certain traditions feel manageable. Recognize that honouring your boundaries is not a limitation—it is a choice that empowers you to move through this time on your own terms and your own way.
Create new rituals that reflect your feelings
One way to navigate the holidays is by creating new traditions that honour your loved one and your memories together. Light a candle in their honour, write a letter, or share stories with close family or friends. If you feel able, find ways to celebrate their life that bring comfort, whether that is cooking their favourite meal, listening to their favourite music, planting a tree in their memory, or donating in their name. These small gestures can feel healing and allow you to make space for the one you miss, keeping their spirit close in a way that aligns with your heart.
Seek comfort in moments of quiet reflection
In the busyness of the festive season, give yourself permission to withdraw for moments of solitude. Whether through meditation, journaling, or simply sitting in a quiet space, these moments can provide grounding when grief feels overwhelming. You can also imagine a quiet and peaceful place that you associate with relaxation and other pleasant feelings. Transport yourself to your tranquil place mentally. Visualise enjoying your surroundings and savouring everything that makes this place truly especial to you. Moreover, observe how your body gradually relaxes and makes you feel more serene and tranquil as the connections with the image deepens. Reflection allows you to reconnect with yourself and acknowledge your emotions without distraction. Remember, grief often demands stillness a sacred pause that honours both your pain and your resilience.
Ground yourself
Sit on a chair with a straight back, relaxed shoulders and both bare feet in parallel touching the floor. Start focusing your attention on your breathing. You do not have to force anything. Then, gradually, start changing the focus to the soles of your feet. Notice the bodily sensations that bring them to your awareness, as well as the sensations between your bare feet and the floor. This exercise helps you feel centred and back in the present, where you belong. Through grieving our losses with our whole self, body, and mind, we not only process and overcome them healthily but also develop emotional well-being and maturity, unconditional self-esteem, and post-traumatic growth.
Embrace support systems: You do not have to do this alone
Grief can be isolating, and during the holidays, that feeling can be even more intense. But you do not have to walk this path alone. Reach out to friends, family, grief therapists and specialists or support groups who understand your grief or who simply offer a listening ear. Many people feel helpless around grieving individuals, unsure how to provide support, but often, they are eager to help when asked. If speaking with loved ones feels too difficult, consider joining a grief support group where others who have experienced loss share understanding and companionship. Remember that professional support counselling, therapy and grief education and support is also available and can provide invaluable tools and guidance for coping during this season.
Give yourself permission to feel joy, even if briefly
Allow yourself small moments of joy without guilt. Often, those grieving feel as though happiness or laughter dishonours the person they have lost, but joy and grief can coexist.
Moments of peace or happiness are not betrayals; rather, they are reminders that healing and love are powerful allies. Embrace the moments, however brief, that bring light into your heart, whether it is a warm drink on a chilly night, the comfort of a cozy blanket, or a walk surrounded by winter’s quiet beauty. These glimmers of joy serve as reminders of your resilience and of the love that endures.
Let’s see the festive season as a milestone in healing
The festive season can be a challenging milestone in your journey, but it can also be a time of growth. Grieving through this period can be an opportunity for your pain to evolve, to celebrate love in new forms, and to recognize the strength you hold. When grief feels consuming, remember that your journey is not static. Each day, each memory, and each new tradition carries you forward, one step at a time. The festive season can help you reach a new understanding of your loss, perhaps even shedding light on the ways your loved one continues to inspire you.
In these moments, it is essential to honour the love that is still present, to trust that your grief, though difficult, will not always weigh you down with the same intensity. As you move through this season, know that every step, whether slow, hesitant, or peaceful, is a part of your healing. You are not alone, and support is always available to you.
Reach out for help and embrace your journey
Grief is unique and personal, often a solitary road, but it does not have to be a lonely one. Whether from a friend, family member, support group, or grief professional, help is there when you need it. Lean into this support, allowing others to share in your journey. Just as you embrace your own unique path, remember the countless others who understand, who support you, and who walk beside you, even from afar.
Final words
As you move forward, let this season serve as a reminder that love endures, that healing is not linear, and that you have the strength within you to honour both the sadness and the joy that coexist. Each moment you choose to honour your grief on your own terms is a moment of courage, a testament to the love you hold. And that love, unwavering and powerful, will carry you through.
While the holidays and festive season will be different without your loved one, they also hold the potential to open new doors and inspire fresh traditions. Leaning into this openness can be an empowering way to begin to reshape the season, one step at a time. In honouring both the joy of the season and the love that remains, this time can gently evolve into a season that feels true to your journey, holding space for both remembrance and renewal.
Nadija Bajrami, Strategic Hypnotherapist, Mind Coach
French by birth, Nadija lived in Scotland for 7 years and travelled the world. After recovering from some serious health issues, Nadija had a wake-up call and came to Ireland to find her path. She has been living in Dublin since 2017. Nadija is working mostly online worldwide and shares her time between Ireland, France, and Switzerland.
Nadija is a multi-award-winning trauma and empowerment specialist with a double diploma in hypnotherapy, mind coaching, and online therapy. She is also a Reiki master and a grief educator, and she has been trained by an international grief specialist and best-selling author, David Kessler. Nadija is also an end of life doula.
She is dedicated to helping her clients get empowered, supercharge their confidence and self-esteem, overcome their limiting beliefs as well as manage anxiety, and trauma responses. She also helps people on their grief and healing journey through her therapy, coaching, grief education and support programmes and spiritual work.
