Written by: Joan Cantu, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
As I reflect on my own experiences with trauma, I cannot help but wonder: What if our darkest moments hold the key to unlocking our greatest strengths? Could it be that the pain we endure has the potential to transform us in ways we never imagined? When I look back on the most challenging times in my life, I found myself asking: How did I find the courage to keep going when everything seems lost and myself was shattered into pieces? Was it the resilience, I did not know I had? or was it the unwavering belief that there was light at the end of the tunnel?
These profound questions shaped my journey
More than a decade ago, I hit rock bottom in my life.
Stranded in a foreign land, Isolated and alone, Weighed down by the burden of loneliness, Consumed by shame, Struggling to recognize my own value, Suffering in silence, Battling with insecurity, Nursing deep emotional wounds, Feeling inadequate and unworthy, Lost in a sea of confusion, Shattered and fragmented, Scarred and broken
Attracting toxic relationships where manipulation and abuse thrived. Then, I reached a pivotal moment where I had no choice but to rise from the ashes and rebuild myself. While I could barely put myself together, I often found solace in the simple act of self-care and self-compassion. I began to ask myself:
What if I treated myself with the same kindness and understanding that I offer to others? Could this be the key to healing the wounds of the past and nurturing a sense of inner peace? And as I dive in deeper into my own trauma, I started to see the world through a different lens. I began to ask:
What if our shared experiences of pain and suffering connect us in ways we never realized? Could it be that our ability to empathize with others stems from our own journey of healing and personal awakening?
I have come to understand that the path to self-betterment is not linear or easy. It requires courage, vulnerability, to challenge my beliefs about myself and a willingness to confront my deepest fears, my most painful wounds, my scars, my own shadows.
My story is not unique. Like many others, I have been scarred by trauma. In times of deep despair, it is natural to feel as though our struggles are isolated, unique to us alone. What if we were to look beyond our individual pain and recognize the universal thread of suffering that connects us all?
Could it be that our shared experiences of trauma serve as a reminder of our common humanity, our shared vulnerabilities, and our ability for resilience? In the aftermath of my trauma, it was too easy to get lost in the shadows of my pain and suffering. However, instead of allowing myself to be defined by my trauma, I chose a different approach. “I often believe it’s part of life and it’s going to past.”
What if I were to see my experiences not as limitations, rather an opportunity for growth and empowerment? What if the decision to keep moving forward, despite the weight of my past, is an act of profound courage and resilience? Could it be that my ability to rise above my circumstances and strive for a better future is a testament to the strength of the human spirit?
What if the true measure of my healing lies not in my ability to overcome my past, rather it's my ability to extend that healing to others? Could it be that my transformation from survivor to thriver is not just a personal triumph, rather a GIFT I can share with those around me? As I am embracing my role as a thriver, I have come to see that healing is not just an individual pursuit.
It is a collective journey towards wholeness and well-being.
Could it be that in opening ourselves up to the guidance and wisdom of others, we can find solace, validation, and a sense of belonging on our path towards healing? Participating in support groups was a transformative experience that led me to reflect: What if the power of community lies not just in shared suffering, rather in shared strength and resilience? Could it be that by connecting with others who have walked a similar path, we can find comfort, understanding, and a sense of solidarity in our journey towards healing and wholeness? Life never stops; it keeps going, and we must, too. And we must move forward with grace, we owe that to ourselves.
Practicing mindfulness and meditation became a cornerstone of my self-care routine, prompting me to ponder: What if the key to healing lies not just in our external actions, rather in our internal state of being? Could it be that by cultivating a sense of presence, awareness, and compassion towards ourselves, we can create a foundation of inner strength and resilience that sustains us through the challenges of healing? Focus on here and now, today is the most important day in your life. Live with a positive mindset and approach each day as if you are already where you want to be.
Journaling my thoughts and feelings was a practice that allowed me to delve deeper into my inner world, prompting me to ask: What if the act of articulating and processing our emotions through writing is not just a therapeutic tool, but a pathway to self-realization and freedom? Journaling your thoughts and emotions is a powerful practice that allows you to have a meaningful conversation with yourself, releasing negativity and filling your soul with joy. Could it be that by honouring our thoughts and feelings on paper, we can gain clarity, insight, and a sense of agency over our own narrative of healing and transformation? As I embarked on the journey of replacing self-criticism with self-compassion, I realized that my inner dialogue had a profound impact on my well-being. I began to get curious:
What if the key to healing lies not just in our external actions, rather in the way we speak to ourselves internally? Could it be that by cultivating a sense of kindness and understanding towards ourselves, we can create a more nurturing and supportive inner environment that fosters healing and growth? Replacing self-doubt with self-confidence was a transformative practice that led me to reflect: What if the power of belief in ourselves lies not just in our external accomplishments, but in our internal sense of worth and potential?
Could it be that by shifting our mindset from one of doubt and fear to one of confidence and self-assurance, we can unlock our innate strength and resilience in the face of trauma and adversity? Replacing self-neglect with self-care became a cornerstone of my healing journey, prompting me to ask: What if the act of prioritizing my own well-being is not just a luxury, but a necessity for healing and growth? Could it be that by tending to our physical, emotional, and spiritual needs with compassion and intention, we can create a foundation of self-love and resilience that sustains us through the challenges of healing?
Learning to forgive myself for my perceived failures and celebrate my achievements, no matter how small, was a practice that taught me the power of self-acceptance and grace. I began to wonder: What if the key to healing lies not just in our external successes, but in our internal ability for self-forgiveness and self-celebration? Could it be that by embracing our imperfections and honouring our strengths, we can cultivate a sense of wholeness and authenticity that empowers us on our path towards healing and transformation?
This shift in perspective towards self-love and self-acceptance was a challenging process that needed constant effort and vigilance. With each act of self-compassion, each moment of self-confidence, and each gesture of self-care, I felt myself growing stronger and more resilient in the face of my trauma. Every act of self-love became a victory over my past wounds, a testament to my ability for healing and growth, and a reminder that I am worthy of love, acceptance, happiness and success…
Through my journey of self-improvement and self-compassion, I came to a profound understanding: Everyone is waging their own battles, whether they are clear or hidden. My past trauma heightened my awareness of the struggles others face and sparked a profound empathy within me. This newfound empathy cultivated patience, understanding, and compassion in my interactions with others. I shifted my perspective from one focused solely on my own pain to one that embraced the common thread of the human experience, connecting us all in our shared journey of triumphs and tribulations.
In my interactions with others, I endeavoured to embody the support and understanding I craved during my darkest moments. I prioritized listening over speaking, comforting over advising, and showing kindness even in the absence of reciprocity. This transformation in my approach to relationships was not a calculated tactic, rather a genuine reflection of the growth and compassion I had cultivated through my personal journey of self-improvement and self-love.
Trauma is a profoundly individual and isolating ordeal, yet its ability for transformation is universally significant. It has the power to propel us toward self-improvement, self-compassion, and empathy. It can shift our identity from that of a victim to a survivor, and from a survivor to a thriver. By sharing my story, my intention is to forge connections with those navigating similar paths. I aim to convey the message that they are not alone in their struggles, that their suffering is legitimate, and that their trauma has the potential to ignite powerful change.
Ultimately, it is not the adversity we have faced that defines us, rather the way we opt to confront and grow from it. Remember, you are defined by your resilience, your ability for love and empathy, and your relentless pursuit of self-betterment. You are not a victim of your past; you are a creator of your future.
Your trauma is a part of your story, it is not the whole story
You are so much more!
It has not only made me stronger but also kinder. It has deepened my understanding of myself and others. It has taught me to love myself unconditionally and to extend that love to those around me.
Now, let us embrace our traumas, confront them, learn from them, and transform them. It is how we rise from ashes. I have also found a sense of purpose in helping others navigate their own journeys of healing. Our experiences, good or bad, are all opportunities for us to learn, to grow, and to transform. Life is a beautiful, chaotic, and sometimes painful journey, it is through these trials and tribulations that we find our true selves. Now, here is to our journeys, our transformations, and our relentless pursuit of growth. Here is to turn our traumas into stepping stones, our pain into purpose, and our experiences into lessons. Here to us embracing our past, celebrating our present, and looking forward to a future where we are not just surviving, but thriving.
And lastly, here is to all of us, for we are not the sum of our traumas, is the culmination of our resilience, our growth, and our transformation. And so, as I continue this path, I remind myself of the power of hope. Hope is not the denial of reality, is the belief in the possibility of a better future. It is the light that guides us through the darkness and the spark that ignites our will to keep going.
I have found that healing is not a destination, is a journey. It is not about "getting over" our trauma, rather it's about integrating it into our story in a way that empowers us. It is about acknowledging the pain, and not letting it have the final say.
Through my journey, I have learned that our greatest strength often lies hidden beneath our deepest wounds. Our traumas can shatter us, but they can also reshape us. They can break us down; however, they can also build us up. They can leave us feeling lost; however, they can also lead us to find ourselves. I have realized that it is okay to not be okay. It is okay to feel the pain, the fear, the anger. It is okay to stumble, to fall. What matters is that we get back up. What matters is that we keep going.
Here to us, turning our wounds into wisdom, our scars into stars, and our pain into power. Here is to us, for we are not just survivors, but thrivers. And most importantly, here is to hope, for it is the beacon that guides us through our darkest nights and leads us towards a brighter tomorrow.
My journey of change started with one choice: to focus on myself, grow and move on and give myself some grace. I owe that to myself. What if knowledge is not just a tool for understanding our pain, rather a pathway to empowerment and transformation?
Could it be that by educating ourselves about the intricacies of trauma and its impact on our lives, we can cultivate a deeper sense of self-awareness and resilience? Looking for coaching and therapy was another crucial step in my journey towards healing and self-discovery. I began to wonder. What if the act of seeking support and guidance is not a sign of weakness, rather a testament to our courage and commitment to our own well-being?
I read books and watched videos; I took classes, yoga and meditation.
I explored new things, I made self-love a part of my daily routine, taking care of my soul and mind.
With help from coaches and mentors, I set big goals and pushed myself, I focus on here and now. I changed my job, I am an author, a speaker, and a coach. I have a loving partner and go on adventures.
I embarked on a 20-day challenge cantered around forgiveness, self-acceptance, building connections, and practicing mindfulness.
Now, I stand as a confident and fulfilled individual, appreciating the beauty of life.
If you are ready to start on your own journey of change, I have something special for you...
Join the Healing Warriors, Rising Strong, move on with grace and unleash the ultimate power within you with the top 3 revolutionary secrets to dominate your 20-day challenge of forgiveness, self-acceptance, connections, and mindfulness.
This challenge involved:
Committing to daily forgiveness practices.
Embracing and accepting YOU each day.
Reaching out and strengthening connections with others.
Engaging in mindful activities and staying present in the moment.
Celebrating each day's progress, no matter how small.
Guided by this challenge, I cultivated a sense of peace and growth within myself.
One that helped me to heal my heart so I could feel passionate and driven!
Empowered me to conquer challenges and embody unwavering strength, warrior mindset.
One that helped me to create success in my business, create a life I love, and business I love, impact lives from all around the globe.
By integrating mindfulness into every aspect of your journey, you will amplify the effectiveness of your efforts and experience profound growth and evolution.
Are you ready to awaken your inner warrior? I invite you to embrace these groundbreaking secrets. With mindfulness as your guiding force, the possibilities are limitless.
Contact info: Joancantucoaching@gmail.com
Joan Cantu, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Joan Cantu has journeyed from a challenging past, transforming herself into a pillar of strength and positivity. She stands as a beacon of hope for those who have experienced abuse, dedicated to guiding them towards freedom and transformation. As an author and speaker, Joan Cantu uses her platform to inspire and uplift others. By sharing her own story of triumph over adversity, she spreads a potent, yet simple message of hope, resilience, and self-belief.
