Written by: Kristen Bilodeau, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
We live in a society where we are inundated with information, options, choices, and responsibilities; a society where overachieving is valued alongside success. Many people feel overwhelmed by having so much to do. We find ourselves constantly juggling obligations while trying to find time to do what we enjoy, be with those we love, or to just be. The expression, “I’d love to, but I don’t have the time,” seems trite but, for many of us, a reality.
True, there are so many waking hours in a day. This prioritizes how we spend our waking hours more essential than ever to feel healthy, present, and fulfilled in our lives.
The experience of evaluating how we spend our days, weeks, and months can open our awareness to the agency we have to change and improve those choices. We have the power to decide where we direct our attention and how we choose to invest in the time we have each day. Time is a gift, and making space for who and what matters to us is a personal responsibility we owe it to ourselves to meet. Making mindful and deliberate choices is a deliberate process that involves truthfulness and reflection about what matters and how we are best serving ourselves and those who matter to us. Choosing with intention can pay off in dividends.
What does it mean to make space, and why is it important?
Being a victim to the demands of life earns you no admirable trophy. By taking ownership and agency over how you spend your time, you can consciously decide what is important in alignment with your values and purpose. For example, by choosing to spend 30 minutes checking email during your day so that you can make space to be with your partner or your children, go for a walk, or get in that workout because you know how great you’ll feel afterward.
Start by writing down who and what is important to you. Ask yourself how much time in a day or week you spend on that person, activity, or goal. Then, list how you spend each hour of your day. What tasks are trivial, tedious, or distracting rather than meaningful and purposeful, such as unimportant errands or phone calls or mindless scrolling on your phone. Where could you eliminate, reschedule, or delegate tasks like these to make time and space to be doing what feels good for you, what helps you rest and stay calm, or helps you feel more energized? Don’t underestimate the power of the simple decisions you make; ten minutes to meditate or take a walk can have profound results when done with consistency.
When you see people who feel happy and fulfilled in their lives, chances are they are consciously aware and deliberate about their choices of how they spend their time each day.
The importance of self-awareness and intuition
Making space to engage with what you desire or need requires understanding who you are and your unique needs and values. If you are an empathic person who feels deeply and gets overwhelmed by stress or overstimulation, taking time alone in silence, or to rest and unplug from daily demands, may be vital to calm your nervous system. Or if you are that person who is constantly doing for others but really makes space and time for yourself, you may be left feeling unappreciated because you are sacrificing your own needs.
Having self-awareness means you are listening to your body and mind, which can provide valuable insight, often in the form of warning signals that your body is sending to your mind. Much in the same way that when we walk into a room and instantly feel uncomfortable, our intuition and physical responses can be the first sign of misalignment.
When we are dictated entirely by our external demands while suppressing our own needs and desires, we can be left suffering from a myriad of negative outcomes; stress anxiety, depression, and burnout. Taking the time to know and be consciously aware of what is important to you and whether or not you are choosing to make space for those values in your life has an incredible impact on your happiness.
How to proactively make space in your life:
1. Assess: Be truthful and honest with yourself. How are you spending your time? Write down, hour by hour or even minute by minute, what you do during your day. Do not judge or defend. Just let the list be what it is.
Next, list what values or goals you have. What is important to you and why? How much time daily, weekly or monthly are you dedicating to these goals and values? Again, be truthful.
2. Reflect: Look at your list; what patterns do you see? Do you see important people or activities missing in this list (including time for you)?
What feelings and emotions are connected or associated with your lists from number one? How does being or doing these activities make you feel, or how do they contribute to your happiness and well-being?
3. Evaluate: What activities and behaviors are necessary or unnecessary? Where can you prune or eliminate time spent on what is unnecessary and what could be delegated? Evaluate the role these activities and decisions play in your life in relation to your values and goals. Be realistic about what you can and should accomplish in your day. Also, remember that life includes both work, play, and rest.
4. Create: Be the designer of your time where can you create time blocks, even in 10 to 15-minute increments, to engage and be available for the activities that align with your needs, values, and happiness. Small steps done consistently turn into habits over time. Habits create your reality and experience.
There will always be obligations and distractions in our lives; that is inevitable. We must not underestimate the power and agency we have over how we choose to do with our time. We are often overscheduled with “to do” list items that we forget we were put on this earth to live our lives. Start making choices that allow you to live that life with meaning.
Follow me on Facebook, Instagram, and visit my website for more info! Read more from Kristen!
Kristen Bilodeau, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine As a Personal Development and Marriage Coach, Kristen Bilodeau leads women through their own personal journey of finding their voice, healing their marriage, and releasing their inner wild woman. As a woman who struggled in her own journey to self-awareness and truth in her life and marriage, Kristen uses the power of a woman’s story as the tool and catalyst for change, healing, and growth. She helps women uncover their truth through questioning and reflection so that they can be the creator of their experiences and thrive as the woman they were meant to be.
