Written by: Belynder Walia, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Are you living with a narcissist and don't even know it? If you're not sure, then this article is for you. It will help you identify the NINE signs that you may be living with a narcissist. Once you know what to look for, it will be easier to make the necessary changes in your life. Once you know you are in a relationship with a narcissist, it will help you manage your expectations in the relationship or help you manage the responses you get from your partner so you can start living your life the way you want to. If the connection is toxic, it is time to take back control of your life and stop letting a narcissist run roughshod over you.
What is a narcissist?
The Mayo Clinic defines narcissism as a 'mental disorder in which people have an inflated sense of their importance and a deep need for admiration.' They say that 'narcissists often have an exaggerated sense of self-importance, are easily angered, and lack empathy for others.'
If you are currently in a relationship with a narcissist, you ought to know what to look for. Here are the NINE signs that you may be living with a narcissist:
1. They are always right
A narcissist never admits that they are wrong, no matter what. Instead, they have the uncanny ability to find a way to twist the facts and make themselves look like the victim.
2. They are always in control
A narcissist likes to control every situation. Therefore, they will never let you have the upper hand or treat you like an equal.
3. They are always charming
A narcissist wants to be the 'life of the party' or the centre of attention, and they will try to charm even manipulate people into doing their bidding.
4. They have a sense of entitlement
A narcissist believes they are entitled to special treatment. Consequently, they expect people to cater to their needs and wants in their personal and professional lives.
5. They are always looking for compliments
Narcissist love compliments, and they will do whatever it takes to receive them.
6. They are on the lookout for enemies
A narcissist is always suspicious of people and believes everyone is out there to hurt them. Their intentions are usually a projection of themselves.
7. They have a high opinion of themselves
A narcissist thinks they are the best thing since sliced bread. They hold a high view of themselves and believe they can do no wrong.
8. They will target their partner
Narcissists will constantly pick on their partner about trivial things and not easily let things subside. As a result, past disagreements are always brought up in current arguments.
9. They are always demanding
A narcissist is always demanding, and they often try to push other people's boundaries by gaslighting situations, intruding in on your space and being unapologetic.
How to deal with a narcissistic partner
1. Set boundaries
It is crucial to set boundaries with a narcissist. Lines of not respecting the boundaries of others They will constantly push your buttons and test your limits, so it is essential to be firm with them and make yourself clear about what is acceptable and what is not.
2. Limit attention
Narcissists love attention, so don't give in to their demands and what they crave. If you ignore them, they will eventually disappear and seek it from elsewhere.
3. Allow yourself to remain in control
A narcissist likes to be in control of every situation, but only because people often give in to them demanding that control. So it's essential to stand up for yourself and don't let them walk all over you.
4. Get professional help
If you struggle to deal with a narcissistic partner, you should seek professional help. There are therapists out there with expertise in helping people deal with narcissists.
5. Leave the relationship
If you can't handle being in a relationship with a narcissist, then it is best to leave before the relationship becomes toxic. It is not healthy to be in a relationship with someone who constantly puts themselves first, puts you down and makes you feel bad about yourself.
Final Thoughts
If you are in a relationship with a narcissist, it is vital to identify the signs so you can take steps to protect yourself. If your partner or loved one exhibits any of these behaviours, in extreme cases, when you can identify the bullying tendencies, control or even the abuse, they may have a narcissistic personality disorder. It is not always easy to leave a relationship with a narcissist, but it is essential to remember that you deserve better. Your well-being is critical, and it is necessary to know that it is best to walk away if there is no change or adaptation from the other person. Seek help from friends, family, or professionals if you need support deciding to leave. Know you are not alone.
Belynder Walia, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Belynder Walia is a leading Psychotherapist, helping people who need a swift, effective solution to a current problem that negatively impacts their lives. She's worked with a wide variety of people, from stay-at-home carers to experts and celebrities in the public eye. Having suffered from Perinatal Anxiety, she focuses on enabling others to learn, heal and grow from pain. Belynder is the founder of Serene Lifestyles, an online and on-set psychotherapy practice at www.serenelifestyles.com. Her ground-breaking methods include a combination of Psychotherapy and Neuroplasticity to help align the THREE Brains (the head, heart, and gut). She's in many publications, including Forbes, Cosmopolitan, Harpers Bazaar, The Moment, Planet Mindful, and Thrive Global. She’s featured on the front cover of Passion Vista as one of the women to look up to 2022. Belynder is also writing her first non-fiction book, to help people radically change their minds to change their lives.
