Written by: Sam Mishra, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Given that sexualized violence against women is a brutal reality for women worldwide, it is reasonable to adopt an inclusive viewpoint on women's sexuality that emphasises pleasure.
I have a keen interest in the application of internal pelvic floor treatment to vaginal wall trigger points, having previously worked as a midwife and gynaecological nurse. Since I'm a therapist and am constantly learning about new massage techniques, a few years ago, when I was offered a therapy exchange, I took the opportunity to research yoni massage in an attempt to address some personal concerns.
Unresolved emotions have the ability to accumulate in the body and lead to physical problems, including yoni problems. As a result of trauma, sexual encounters, childbirth, social conditioning, belief systems, and cellular memories, unpleasant emotions can build up and cause physical imbalances and health problems like endometriosis, urticaria, sensitivity, and pain. This was definitely the case for me as well, as I believed that my low libido and sexual dysfunction were caused by the continuous pain from endometriosis. Emotional problems and conditioning from my upbringing undoubtedly influenced my unconscious decisions to enter an abusive relationship. In actuality, the emotional weights that had been placed on me over a long period of time were more to blame for my problems. What I found out is that yoni massage helps women not only let go of these pent-up emotions but also heal the resulting bodily imbalances.
A lack of sensitivity and responsiveness often occurs in the yoni when there has been trauma, and this will negatively impact on how the woman experiences pleasure after penetration. Usually, the trauma will be of a sexual nature, but not always, and there are various other contributing factors to the yoni shutting down. Whatever the reason, yoni therapy is a progressive healing journey which will see increased capacity for feeling pleasure as the woman becomes more awakened and self aware, with reduced release of trauma at each session.
Awakening the yoni and supporting the client in discovering who she is, mean that as the release lessens, the movement towards a capacity for increased pleasure, becomes greater.
The key to the effectiveness of a yoni massage is realising something that is often overlooked in Western medical education, particularly in the UK and many other nations: trauma and unresolved issues carry energy that finds a home in your body. Unresolved emotional problems are stored in the body, but yoni massage helps uncover these buried energies and, in turn, helps us locate the location of the traumas themselves. Since trauma can be stored all over the body, the massage sessions involve work on the whole body, gradually becoming more intimate and ending with a yoni massage (with the recipient's full agreement). The goal of the combined external and internal massage is to heal past scars and relieve physical and emotional tension that are keeping women from reaching their full potential and realising their inner selves.
Many mistakenly think that yoni massage is a sexual practice. Yoni massage is a direct, respectful experience that allows women to allow themselves to enjoy pleasure without any expectation or end goal. It tackles a woman's well-being in a completely holistic manner and can also be performed as a self-massage.
Women's experiences of vaginal trauma and sex
Many women experience chronic pain during their sexual lives. This pain can be caused by a variety of factors, including vaginal problems (such as vaginitis, atrophy during menopause, or scarring), medical conditions (such as endometriosis, pelvic inflammatory disease, or a retroverted uterus), physiological problems (such as infection, pelvic floor weakness, perineal scarring, or a small vaginal introitus), or other problems (such as sexual assault, female genital mutilation, etc.
Undoubtedly, in my twenties, when I was experiencing severe pain from endometriosis and living in an abusive marriage, I believed that sex was meant to feel that way and didn't enjoy it. However, when I reached my thirties, I found that, with a few adjustments, I actually loved it, and discovered a new level of self and sexual confidence. However, women frequently express that they wait for the pain to stop because they are afraid of failing their partner despite the fact that they are in so much pain. Cystitis, vaginitis, yeast infections, and chronic inflammation and pain can result from this. For some reason, our bodies simply won't let us enjoy having sex, and a lot of the time, medical testing yields negative results. We begin to wonder if maybe our partner's uncircumcised penis turns us off, if their penis is too large, or if there is simply no physical attraction at all. However, as we become older and learn more about ourselves, we frequently come to the realisation that there's a chance the reason we've had so many problems is that we've gone through trauma. This doesn't always have to be sexual trauma; emotional trauma can also occur from being made to feel unworthy or from being repeatedly cheated on in relationships.
Vaginal injury
An estimated 50% of women have gone through some form of sexual trauma, which is retained in the vagina. This trauma can range from difficult virginity loss or being penetrated when not lubricated enough. Early exposure to the violent nature of sex can cause the muscles to harden and cause the vagina to seal off, causing years of pain during sexual activity. Trauma is essentially defined as anything that occurs too quickly or too soon for your body to process. This can cause numbness in the breasts or vagina, make it difficult to get an orgasm, make it difficult to connect with your partner during sex, make you not want to have sex, or make you feel as though something is wrong but no diagnosis is made.
What proof exists for Yoni massage's healing properties, and will it displace conventional therapies?
When it comes to yoni massage as a trauma healing therapy, we are treading very carefully because while it might be appropriate for a past trauma that isn't severely impairing daily functioning, it is not appropriate for women who are actively experiencing trauma (for example, finding it difficult to function, feeling uneasy all the time, or having a major impact from the trauma on your everyday life). Furthermore, a lot of professionals list trauma services even when they genuinely know very little about trauma. Certain therapists who claim to be trauma-aware actually have very little training; therefore, they won't know how to manage a session to limit the likelihood of trauma reactions occurring or what to do if a client exhibits a trauma response during it. They might also be ignorant of the need to reject a new client who is experiencing severe trauma.
Women who have experienced sexual assault have been taken advantage of, mistreated, molested, and raped without their consent, and made to feel unworthy of respect. They require a therapist who will walk them into their pelvic region without having any preconceived notions and whose only goal is to assist them as they discover their own bodies, inquire about their inner lives, and respectfully and curiously explore.
Yoni therapy takes a gentle, respectful, and nurturing approach to the vagina, bringing our attention towards what feels good and peaceful, with full embodied consent, being touched with absolute honour and reverence. This approach may be supportive for women who have experienced trauma related to their sexuality in the past. Rewiring the relationship between the pelvic area and sexual self can be profoundly healing when the pelvic zone receives thorough care and nurturing attention for the entire body following uncaring experiences.
Many women have found it to be more successful than typical counselling, but it isn't for everyone. While yoni massage is not a cure-all for sexual trauma, it can be quite beneficial when combined with other forms of therapy.
However, it is not possible to measure the effectiveness of yoni massage through qualitative double-blind research studies since women cannot receive a yoni massage in a false manner, akin to a study doctor administering a placebo without knowing if it is the genuine thing. Therefore, in order to determine the relative worth of yoni massage in comparison to other therapies, we quantify its efficacy by comparing the outcomes of women with generally similar conditions who attempted different treatments. When women say that they see a substantial shift as a result of the bodywork, on top of the fact that many of them have attempted talking therapies and failed to find a solution to their problems, it is clear that something is lacking in conventional medicine.
It would make sense that competent talking therapy would be successful in addressing emotional trauma if it was stored at the mental level. I have nothing against talking therapies; in fact, several of them specifically seek to reach deeper levels of the mind. These specific strategies can also be quite effective, but they don't, in my opinion, address the issue at its most pertinent level. Emotional trauma is, in my opinion, unresolved energy that is caught in a locked cycle; it needs to move but is unable to do so since it is stuck, thus it becomes a knot that is buried deep within our bodies. Because yoni massage tackles suppressed emotions at the exact level at which they have been stored in the body, it can be incredibly effective. Although emotional traumas may have cerebral expressions, they are not cerebral events, so it is best to work at a somatic energetic level for them to move and discharge.
Deeply ingrained traumas can be found and brought to the surface, where they can be processed and closed down, bringing profound awareness. Yoni massage facilitates this process. From this angle, counselling may be more beneficial after yoni massage once the issue has been identified and a significant degree of discharge has taken place.
How can I benefit from Yoni massage therapy?
Changing the way women select and perceive people who have entered their personal space may be the therapy's main goal. From painful or traumatic sexual encounters to the frequently numbing atmosphere of visiting a gynaecologist, we can hold any tension in our pelvic region, which impairs our ability to experience pleasure. By employing an internal mapping technique that establishes a framework for the pelvic areas that require treatment, internal yoni massage locates and releases the root of bad habits and sexual setbacks that conceal themselves as knots and tightness in the muscles. It's about giving women the tools to completely understand their own vaginas, improving the health of their pelvic floor, and helping them develop good body images.
The treatment room transforms into a quiet, safe space where women can indulge in happy emotions guilt-free, assisting in the correction of imbalances and the development of healthy behaviours. These women may have unfavourable views about the look of their yoni, but the massage permits a positive relationship with it. Alternatively, these women may have stored tension and unpleasant sentiments in their yoni, such as guilt and repression, owing to social conditioning. However, the massage can release these emotions. The massage can therefore aid in resolving trust issues, reducing pain and numbness, relieving stress and anxiety, and increasing orgasmic potential by releasing hidden emotions. As a result of this empowerment, women may find it easier to connect with themselves on a deeper level, develop genuine sensual relationships with others, and feel more sexually energetic and intimate.
Many other problems might contribute to yoni tension and the consequent risk of sexual dysfunction, even though trauma—either unpleasant sexual encounters or abuse—accounts for a significant portion of women harbouring tension and emotions in their yoni. Unfaithful partners, an inability to communicate feelings and sexual desires (possibly as a result of upbringing), hurtful remarks about appearance, childbirth, surgery, or medical conditions like endometriosis are a few examples. When women suppress these negative emotions, they build up in the yoni and cause dysfunctional cycles. The woman experiences discomfort from the tension, which is followed by numbness from the decreased blood and energy flow that tries to ease the pain and a sense of disconnection from that area of her body. The woman consequently finds it challenging to enjoy herself. Sexual energy can flow freely after these blocks are removed, resulting in an improved awareness of one's own sexual wellbeing and orgasmic potential. Improved intimacy and self-esteem will follow from this. However, before this knowledge and connection can occur, the woman must be in charge of establishing the boundaries and feel comfortable enough to really open up. Yoni massage is therefore always tailored to the needs of the individual and does not follow a predetermined schedule. The woman gets a full body massage beforehand to help her unwind and become sensitive to pleasure, but the ultimate goal is for her to feel sexually aroused and unconditionally loved.
Is receiving a yoni massage a sexual act?
There are a lot of misconceptions around Yoni massage, and while the concept of a light pelvic healing massage and internal vaginal massage may sound very enticing or repulsive, it isn't intended to be a sexual encounter. It is a therapeutic procedure that goes much beyond just enjoyment. Although orgasms can occur when certain techniques are employed for foreplay, this is not the goal of therapy. Yoni massage is not painful, unlike, say, a gynaecological examination, and it has been demonstrated that the enhanced circulation of yoni benefits both the body and the mind.
If not bodily arousal, then what is the purpose of this kind of massage? In order to release the physical, emotional, and spiritual obstacles that lead to stress and irritation, as well as to rejuvenate, heal, and enhance overall well-being, the goal is to awaken underactive or underused nerve endings in the yoni to become functional. Women can release stress and negative emotions through orgasm and possibly ejaculation by opening up and reconnecting with their sexual organs to allow positive sexual energy to flow. After a variety of traumas, belief systems, etc., this release can lead to less discomfort, better pleasure, and the chance for orgasm. It can also cause laughing, crying, and other emotional reactions.
Women might also learn more about their anatomy during these sessions, such as where the G-spot is located. If and when they feel ready, women will attain a climax; even if they are uncomfortable moving the session farther, they can still receive mental and physical healing.
Because of your fragility, the first yoni massage will be the most painful, but as negative emotions and blockages are released, it will get easier. These sessions often last three to seven hours, and although it seems logical that some women might be reluctant to undergo such a treatment—possibly due to embarrassment—the advantages are obvious.
What happens during a Yoni massage?
The most crucial aspect of any yoni massage sessions is consent, and each woman determines exactly how much of the massage she wants to get. In their initial session, some women choose not to receive any physical touch treatment; if they choose to, they are free to pause at any moment and talk with the therapist about challenging feelings. Many women are apprehensive when they touch someone for the first time, yet they come away fully convinced of its potency.
The woman's sexual experiences will be thoroughly discussed, along with any other issues that may aid in self-discovery and healing, either before the session or during the first hour of it. This helps the practitioner identify the physical places that require healing as well as any areas that might be more prone to eliciting a trauma response.
Typically, the massage begins with a complete body massage to promote relaxation. This is followed by a more sensual massage that targets parts of the body, like the buttocks and breasts, that aren't often handled during other massages. The intention is for the massage to grow increasingly intrusive over time. The massage then moves on to touching the external genitalia and interior work with the woman's permission. Even the internal work can vary widely; it might be as little as a small amount of G-spot work within or as intense as full body orgasms or even ejaculation. Thus, the entire pelvic region—including the vulva and the interior of the vagina—will be massaged; yet, this is not a gynaecologist visit.
Trauma responses during Yoni massage
It makes sense that when these areas are massaged, not only can physical tension be released but also any emotional energy or trauma that may have been stored there. This is because our tissues store trauma, emotions, and possibly memories, especially in the vagina of women. This implies that intense emotional reactions may be elicited, memories connected to the trauma or emotion stored in the body may surface, and an uncomfortable physical reaction may arise. These trauma-related reactions have the potential to overstimulate the neurological system, inducing the fight-flight-freeze response and making the woman behave in ways that are uncontrollable. Waves of lethargy or tiredness may pass through the lady, or she may freeze completely, or she may experience intense resistance or an overwhelming wish to stop. These could be memories that are upsetting, frightening, or triggering, or they could be terrible feelings of guilt, fear, or pure horror. It is also common for women to numb out so they are unable to feel their bodies, or to detach and check out entirely. They might separate and then re-unite without remembering the events that transpired beforehand or how they got there.
Because of this, it's critical to work with a therapist who understands trauma and has actual experience with both internal pelvic treatment and trauma. This therapist should be able to identify these trauma responses and respond correctly without overtaxing the woman emotionally.
Because the body has created these defence systems to protect them, it is also a natural trauma response for women to criticise themselves or feel embarrassed or ashamed about the incident afterwards.
My own personal yoni massage experience
Not knowing much about yoni massage at the time, I agreed to the therapy exchange and later understood that this could be far more helpful to me than I had thought. Regarding potential problems and my sexual interactions, I was questioned a lot. It was similar to seeing a counsellor, with the obvious difference being that this addressed both mental and physical issues. As a result, the massage began with a full-body treatment that included elements of Thai massage to induce relaxation. I recognised many factors that were influencing my difficulty in opening up emotionally to my sexual partners, sometimes affecting sexuality and intimacy, and I believe my ability to maintain relationships. After that, in order to get ready for the yoni massage, there was a gentler, more sensuous massage that gradually covered the more private parts. I had a lot of responses throughout the session, some of which were anticipated and others of which weren't. As a result of the negative energy turning into good energy, I anticipated experiencing intense pleasure and pain that would alternate occasionally, along with numbness. I knew that in order to relax, I would have to pay attention to my breathing. Because of the problems I was having, I didn't think that I could truly feel full body orgasmic waves, even though I knew that I could experience different forms of orgasmic energies based on the location being stimulated and that they may endure for twenty to sixty minutes.
In addition, there were moments when I experienced altered states of consciousness, reconnected with trauma from the past, shallow or held my breath, and rigid body sensations. In addition, I would experience episodes of hyperventilation, which caused my hands and arms to constrict uncontrollably. Naturally, I now understand that this tetany is a symptom of the healing process and letting go of the old trauma as a breathwork facilitator. Similar to the emotions I witness in my trauma release breathwork courses, the abrupt and unexpected waves of tears and fury are also a necessary part of the healing process.
For me, additional indications of the deep healing resulting from the yoni massage included headaches during and after the session because of blocked energy, heat in the spine, shivering, and intense fear during the massage (all indications of accumulated negative energy slowly leaving the body), and feeling extremely energised after the session.
The knowledge gained via case studies
I've learned how generational trauma and shame can affect all aspects of your life, and getting a yoni massage is one way that this is relevant after completing some inner child work recently. Our sexual awareness can be greatly influenced by how we are conceived and raised. During these therapy sessions, feelings that we suppressed or coping mechanisms that we adopted as children may come to light.
A woman can receive the gift of being pleasured without seeing an end in sight by deliberately avoiding initiating an orgasm and continuously expanding the body's capacity for embodied presence and pleasure in order to reveal any areas of contraction in the form of pain or numbness, resistance to receiving, or dissociation, which often reveal feelings of fear, sadness, or resentment.
During a yoni massage, it's possible that other body parts may experience discomfort. This is because certain emotions are stored in different parts of the body, so it makes sense that when we release an emotion, that area will experience it. We often store anger, for instance, in the head or chest, so if during the massage, a particular place is palpated that may be holding tension related to a past sexual assault, this anger may return and cause a headache or discomfort in the chest.
A yoni massage's primary objectives are to relieve pain and blockages, release trauma, and bring feeling back to numb areas. Repressed emotions, feelings, or disrupted physical, emotional, or energetic expressions that are still repressed and stored in the body's musculature and neurological system are examples of how trauma that has been retained in the body can be released by "discharging" these energies. The body and neurological system can expand and relax whenever such long-held tensions are eventually released.
Although the pleasure and release that comes with yoni massage can lead to increased expansiveness in many other areas of our lives, the shift in perspective that women can experience regarding their past, their bodies, and how their sexual experiences are their own, rather than something they gave away or attributed to others, may be the most beneficial area of expansion.
Sam Mishra, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Sam Mishra (The Medical Massage Lady), is a multi-award winning massage therapist, aromatherapist, accredited course tutor, oncology practitioner, trauma practitioner and breathwork facilitator. Her medical background as a nurse and a midwife, combined with her own experiences of childhood disability and abuse, have resulted in a diverse and specialised service. She is motivated by the adversity she has faced, using it as a driving force in her charity work and in offering the vulnerable a means of support. Her aim is to educate about medical conditions using easily understood language, to avoid inappropriate treatments being carried out and for health promotion purposes in the general public.
References:
Plancke, C. (2020). Yoni touch and talk: Sacralizing the female sex through tantra. Sexualities, 23(5-6), 834-848.
Kasthoory Lekshmy Muraleedharan, Cinu Mithra Nisa Sushilal, Parvathy Unnikrishnan, Anjaly Mraleedharn & Hemavathi Shivapura Krishnarajabhatt (2023) Ayurveda management of cystocele, uterine prolapse and weak pelvic floor strength-A case report. Journal of Ayurveda and Integrated Medical Sciences Vol.14 Issue 4 July – August.
Shravani P. & Savita S. Patil (2023) Sthanika Chikitsa in the geriatric women suffering from Dyspareunia – A Case Study. Journal of Ayurveda and Integrated Medical Sciences Vol.8 no.3 March.
Shroff, F. M (2007) The Joyous Yoni: An Exploration of Yogic Perspectives Toward Sexual Empowerment for Women. Journal of International Women’s Studies Vol.8 Issue 4
Ventegodt, S., Clausen, B & Merrick, J (2006) Clinical Holistic Medicine: Pilot Study on the Effect of Vaginal Acupressure (Hippocratic Pelvic Massage) The Scientific World Journal Vol.6 March
