Written by: Dr. Ann Moir-Bussy, Senior Level Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
So, you've arrived at your fifties or almost mid-life with the tremendous unknown horizon before you. Are you going to embrace this new phase, or do you long to go back to where it was safe and secure – or do you think it was safe because it was known to you? Mid-life is a beautiful time, for as you transition through menopause, you are being given an invitation to open up to life – it's a calling. As David Whyte, the poet, once said in a talk, "Life is no passing memory of what has been but the remaining pages of a great book waiting to be read" It's a time to open our eyes and embrace the fabulous fifties and more.
So many women reach this stage and feel powerless, blocked, or limited. They sense that something big is possible but either fear the shift from where they are or feel unable to shift because of the power structure surrounding them. Many women I work with don't even own or recognise the enormous achievements they have made, but they do feel a call to something more significant and more fulfilling – they are looking for a new system, a new way of being in this world. Here are some tips on engaging in this great adventure into the unknown.
1. Shed your old skin and move to self-compassion and owning your achievements.
When Moses stood before God, he was told to take off his shoes, for he was standing on holy ground. The Hasidic work for taking off your shoes is the same word used for an animal shedding its skin. In mid-life, you must let go of your old self to make room for the new emerging. When a swan wants to move from its awkwardness to its beauty and freedom, it must move to the element it belongs – it must go into the water.
At these crossroads, it's time to realise that you are the universe in microcosm and that the universe is within you – open yourself to this phenomenal gift and the powers that come with it. Don't be stuck in disbelief, in yourself, caught in an endless cycle of the same old and not letting go.
2. Listen to your soul – become a reverent listener.
Mid-life is a transition, and you are on the threshold, in a liminal space. A liminal space is a space between crises and action, dilemma, fear and choice, opportunity and action. It includes being on the edge of evolutionary growth, between the here and now and the unknown place calling us.
It is a time to listen reverently to the voice within you and be responsible for healing those things that no longer serve you. It is a time to question assumptions and become a co-creator of your world. The universe is holding its breath, waiting for you to take that place you can only fill.
3. Move from isolation to connection. So often, women reach mid-life and feel alone when it comes to recognising and owning the deep inner wisdom, intuition, and creativity they have and want to manifest. The key is to connect with women around you who also have so many resources to share. Together, women are a powerhouse of profound wisdom and knowing; together, they can ride the winds of change with new flexibility, courage and grace. Become a radiant beam to others because you share the light of the divine. See how powerful that light can be when you join together.
4. Be on the path and live with what you haven't figured yet. If you look carefully, you will see that you’ve created daily rituals that keep you imprisoned inside yourself. What are the things preventing you from engaging in your transformation? We must crack open our hearts a little and let the wind in.
I remember the decisive moment when I realised that I had to walk across this unknown sea and into my future. We cannot construct a life in which we are not vulnerable or immune to the difficulties and losses people have experienced over time. We will see the path, and sometimes it will disappear, but it will come back again if we stay on the journey.
We cannot choose not to choose.
I began with the title that this is an invitation to the rest of your life and that you are in your fabulous! Why Fabulous?
Let us learn from the Apache Indians, who have a beautiful saying:
“In order to understand spring, a person must know summer and winter. To understand menopause, we must understand fertility. We must learn to honour the changing woman – the proud giver of life”.
Just because menstruation has ended does not mean you stop giving birth. You may not give birth physically anymore, but you will give birth to new ways of being, the creativity and intuitive wisdom within you, and others' growth as well as your own.
It is a time to reclaim your deep feminine wisdom. Marion Woodman, Jungian Analyst, in her book The Pregnant Virgin (1985), reminds us that at this stage of life, a woman must be
Forever pregnant Forever giving birth Forever a virgin.
Forever pregnant with the possibilities within, the unsung song, the seeds waiting to be nourished and to grow.
Forever giving birth and sharing these gifts with the world that needs powerful feminine wisdom.
Forever a Virgin – she is one in herself and stands on the ground of her being.
Remember that we are the only part of creation that can refuse to live out or give birth to our gifts because we forget the essential nature of ourselves. You are a beautiful universe because you are one with the universe within you, so give that gift to the world.
We would love you to join my Fabulous 50s and more Facebook page, and you are invited to be among the first to join the Fab at Fifty Women's Circle Closed Facebook group, where you can build that powerful support on the journey.
If you would like individual support, check out this free webinar here.
Or sign up for a Free discovery call here.
“When you find the courage to change at mid-life", Angeles Arrien teaches, "a miracle happens". Your character is opened, deepened, strengthened, and softened. You return to your soul's highest values. You are now prepared to create your legacy: an imprint of your dream for our world – a dream that can fully come true in the Second half of life (2005)
Dr. Ann Moir-Bussy, Senior Level Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
The rich life experience of Dr. Ann Moir-Bussy spans decades of missionary work, teaching, counseling, transformative life coaching, consulting, and becoming a best-selling author.
She taught in schools across Australia and, in Indigenous schools in the Northern Territory and also trained Chinese students in Hong Kong in counseling and psychology. The founder and editor of the Asia Pacific Journal of Counselling and Psychotherapy for ten years, Ann, is now editor of the Australian Counselling Research Journal.
During a life of transitions and transformations to now conscious aging, Ann brings her dedication and zest to guide women in mid-life to discover renewed clarity, purpose, and direction as they embrace their powerful feminine wisdom and intuition in their afternoon of life. Through her programs, podcasts, coaching, and writing, Ann enables women to develop a strong spiritual leadership that brings transformation in their life, work, and world.
Ann is featured in Unified Brainz Who’s Who of the World 2022 – Coffee Table Book Quintessential Limited Edition
