Written by: Adriana Leigh, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Heated discussions in the case and verdict of Johnny Depp and Amber Heard have real-life impacts that will silence victims from speaking up. When speaking about this case with loved ones, on social media, or with colleagues, here are some crucial tips to keep in mind.
1. The number of reported cases of sexual violence and abuse is staggeringly low, as is the number of false allegations. For example, in Canada, despite being the most serious offense measured by the General Social Survey, only 5% of sexual assaults were brought to the attention of the police, Statistics Canada, 2014. The idea that men are punished due to false accusations is not supported by research. Figures from the United States Department of Justice suggest the number of sexual assaults which are never reported far outweighs the number of fake accusations, noting that one of the highest percentages of unreported crimes is rape or sexual assault (65%), see: The Truth about False Assault Accusations by Women, Katty Kay, BBC News.
2. Sexual violence and abuse myths are rampant. Countless social media users spent the better part of the past months dissecting Heard’s allegations and her character, often accusing her of being a liar. See The Decision In The Amber Heard And Johnny Depp Case Will Silence Survivors, Alanna Vagianos, Huffington Post. Some paint Depp as the victim, deceived by a mischievous woman. This portrait perpetuates and exposes the biased belief that women lie or exaggerate sexual violence, which is not supported by research. This belief further serves to silence victims from coming forward, diverts our attention from the reality of sexual violence and abuse, and takes the onus away from society to change.
A note on why we tend to blame the victim. According to Victim Blaming in Canada, Canadian Resource Centre for Victims of Crime, there is a fear-based tendency to blame a person who experienced abuse to reassure ourselves that this could not happen to us. Even family members do this. A common statement may sound like “she was raped because she walked home alone in the dark, and I would never do that, so I will not be raped.” (“Blaming the Victim,” 1998). Many of us do not want to imagine losing control of our bodies, so we make up the story that a victim brought on the attack.
3. Countless (non-celebrity) survivors face barriers to disclosing sexual violence and abuse. While all genders can commit abuse (we still live in a world that normalizes it), we must keep in mind that the predominance of sexual violence and abuse affects women and girls, and gender-diverse people. According to the Canadian Women’s Foundation, “anybody can experience sexual violence, no matter their background, identity, or circumstance, that said, women, girls, and gender-diverse people are at high risk of sexual violence, some at even higher risk due to the additional discrimination and barriers they face including women with disabilities, Indigenous women, and women who are homeless or under-housed.”
4. We need to generate options for accountability and healing for both abusers and abused. If we want a more just, violence-free world, the judicial system as it is currently does not always offer a path to justice or healing, particularly in cases of sexual violence and abuse. Defamation cases are often used to silence disclosure of sexual violence and abuse and not just in the realm of celebrity. For example, more than 1 in 5 student survivors who report an assault to their school are threatened with a defamation suit, according to a 2021 report from anti-sexual violence organization Know Your IX, see: The Decision In The Amber Heard And Johnny Depp Case Will Silence Survivors, Alanna Vagianos, Huffington Post.
We need to imagine and generate more options, such as restorative justice, as tools for accountability and healing for both victims and perpetrators, along with greater awareness-raising to build new skills and ways of being with each other. Remember, those that commit abuse are often perpetuating what they have been taught. Unless we break this cycle, violence will continue. Blaming and shaming in these cases does nothing but perpetuate the cycle of violence.
As I noted in my article, Should Workplace Sexual Harassment Prevention And Workplace Respect Be Heart-Centred?, to change ways of being with each other, people need to be empowered to see themselves as part of the problem AND the solution and need new tools to take action that leads to positive change. In my training with organizations, such as Building a Culture of Respect, I integrate activities to build participants’ relational skills and confidence to take positive action, by focusing on empathy and perspective-taking, assertive and non-violent communication, while helping them understand the impact of the behavior. We need more of this to move towards consensual, respectful, and violence-free relations at work and home.
5. Discussions and jokes about sexual assault and domestic violence have real-life consequences. Some people are quick to deny how discussions about Heard can impact victims of sexual violence and abuse. “Every tweet calling Heard a “lying bitch;” the mob mentality of support for Depp; the automatic reaction to gloss over Depp’s violent history because Heard was also sometimes violent. Survivors and victims are reading all these things and noting who in their lives is safe to disclose to and who is not, your sister, your best friend, or your nephew. People who are deciding between dropping out of college or going to class with their abuser, colleagues deciding if going to HR will actually stop the sexual harassment at work ”See The Decision In The Amber Heard And Johnny Depp Case Will Silence Survivors, Alanna Vagianos, Huffington Post.
Remember that as Farah Khan notes, “jokes become ideas, this idea that you can demean, persecute and shame people then becomes harassment, threats, and verbal abuse and if people think that's okay, then it'll lead to other things like sexual assault and physical violence; these are not jokes they are real people's lives” see: How Memes about the Depp-Heard trial can have Real-Life Consequences, CBC News.
Judgments, jokes, or attacks against Heard risk pushing folks in our own families, or workplaces to suffer in silence, rather than disclose sexual violence or abuse.
I leave you with crucial questions:
Does how you speak about this case align with who you want to be in the world and show up for your loved ones?
How will you act when a loved one or colleague experiences sexual violence? Will you write hateful comments about their character on social media?
One verdict cannot and will not nullify the reality of sexual violence. This is a challenging time for your family members, your loved ones, colleagues, and employees who are survivors of sexual violence and abuse. Support them rather than tear them down.
Adriana Leigh, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Adriana Leigh is a Canadian self-described "recovering lawyer" turned global gender consultant, facilitator, trainer, writer, and speaker, She builds safer, gender-equitable, caring, and inclusive workplaces and organizations, free of sexual harassment and gender-based violence.
She brings a much-needed human and heart-centered, rather than a merely compliance-centered approach to these issues, combined with her legal and subject matter expertise and background in human rights education.
Adriana delivers global workshops, on sexual harassment, and violence policy and reporting processes development, implementation coaching to managers and human resources, and thought leadership. She works cross-sector with UN agencies building the capacity of partner organizations, and international human rights organizations, in addition to private sector clients and universities.
Her work has been showcased by Charity Village, Medium, UN Women, Sexual Violence Research Initiative, Mtavari Channel, Brainz Magazine, and World Pulse, among others.
She is the recipient of a World Pulse Spirit Award in the Champion category, and was featured by World Pulse in the article: “Her Story Makes History: 21 Women Leaders to Watch in 2021” in the company of a group of 21 changemakers from 13 different countries who are connecting online to power change on the ground.
