Written by: Anne Hellgren, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Everyone wants to feel needed in a relationship, but no one wants to feel suffocated by neediness in their relationship.
In the world of relationships, there's a fine line between love and neediness. While it's perfectly normal to desire closeness and connection with your partner, becoming overly needy can put a strain on the relationship. So, if you've caught yourself being a bit too clingy or dependent lately, don't worry; we've all been there at some point. The key is recognizing it and taking steps to strike a healthier balance.
Here are some down-to-earth tips on how to stop being so needy in your relationship and cultivate a more balanced and fulfilling connection:
1. Self-reflection is key
The first step in taming neediness is to look inward. Ask yourself why you're feeling this way. Is it a past experience that's haunting you, or perhaps insecurities that need addressing? Self-awareness is your greatest ally. Understanding the root of your neediness is the first step toward overcoming it.
2. Find your independence
It's crucial to remember that your identity and happiness shouldn't be solely dependent on your partner. Reconnect with your own passions, interests, and hobbies. Reignite that spark within yourself, and you'll not only feel more fulfilled but also bring a more vibrant you into the relationship. Reigniting your individual interests not only keeps you engaged and happy but also reminds you of your identity outside the relationship.
3. Boost your Self-Esteem
Building your self-esteem is like giving yourself a protective shield against neediness. Focus on your strengths, passions, and achievements. When you find value within yourself, you become less reliant on external validation. A great way to build your self-esteem is to practice more self-love and self-appreciation.
4. Open and honest communication
Communication is the cornerstone of any healthy relationship. Instead of bottling up your insecurities or concerns, talk openly with your partner. Share your feelings and fears, but avoid making them solely responsible for your emotional well-being. Sharing your concerns can lead to a more supportive, understanding dynamic, as they may not even be aware of your feelings.
5. Set healthy boundaries together
Setting healthy boundaries is essential. Allow both you and your partner space for your individual lives and friendships. Trust that you can spend time apart without jeopardizing the relationship. Boundaries are about maintaining a sense of self within the partnership- a crucial necessity for happy long-term relationships.
If your neediness seems overwhelming or deeply rooted, don't hesitate to seek support from a coach or therapist. They can provide valuable insights and strategies to address underlying issues and build healthier relationship dynamics.
So, my friend, you can overcome neediness. It's about finding a balance between the beautiful interdependence that is a healthy relationship and the independence that makes you uniquely you.
If you would like to hear my PODCAST EPISODE ON THIS TOPIC, please listen to it here.
If you would like any help in this area or other relationship-related areas, please drop me an email at anne@annehellgren.com. You can also learn more about me and my work here.
Anne Hellgren, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Anne is the Founder of Anne Hellgren Coaching, a Relationship Expert, Certified Coach, Board Member & Podcast Host. She helps people live fulfilled, successful, and joyful lives through their relationship with themselves and others.
Her expertise has helped her clients to gain the Confidence, Clarity, Communication, Connections, and Mindset that have changed their relationships and many other areas of their lives. Her Podcast 'The Love You Want – It starts with you', has a global audience and is ranked as one of the most shared podcasts globally by Spotify.
Anne works with her clients on a deep level because she has experienced most of what she helps others through. Her own life experiences of past bad, abusive, and toxic relationships, as well as a contentious divorce, provide a level of understanding and empathy that is much valued by those she helps. She has combined her life experiences with her qualifications, that is, an MSc in Occupational & Organisational Psychology, a BSc in Counselling Psychology, NLP, and Time-Line Therapy practices, amongst other qualifications, to create very impactful and empowering coaching programs. Being able to create bespoke programs for her client's exact needs is one of her many areas of expertise.