Written by: Twanna Carter, PhD, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
This can be challenging because you may have to admit that your way isn't getting you what you want.
You may be afraid to admit that your way isn't working.
You might be afraid to admit that you don't know everything about what you're doing, and that's okay!
Sometimes we need help and admitting it is a sign of strength and wisdom, not weakness or failure.
Sometimes admitting mistakes and failures means acknowledging they were our own fault. But seeing this as an opportunity to grow, instead of as an excuse to keep playing the same old games won't make us weak or stupid; it will make us stronger in the end!
Admitting we need change doesn't mean something's wrong with us (if anything, it shows the opposite); instead, it means we have the courage to see where things are going wrong so we can fix them before they go completely off track!
This will give you something to look forward to and help you get unstuck.
Plan Something Fun
Planning something fun can inspire you to get out of your rut. You don’t want to put too much pressure on yourself, but if there’s something you really want to do and haven't done in a long time, it might be the motivation you need to push through a slump. Go rollerblading with friends, see a concert, or go hiking. The options are endless!
Plan Something Adventurous
If your goal is an adventure and not necessarily fun, then by all means, go for it! There are so many ways that people can experience adventures in their lives; some examples include visiting another country or taking dance classes. These experiences will not only give you inspiration but also help expand your horizons and make connections with others who share similar interests with you (like dancing).
Be open to learning more and changing.
You may think that change is scary, but it’s actually one of the most important parts of human development. The more you learn and experience, the more you change mentally and physically. Learning to accept yourself and others for who they are will be a huge part of that process.
If you are open to learning more about yourself and others, then you will naturally be open to change as well. The only way we can grow as individuals is through our ability to adapt and evolve into different people over time, and this requires us to be willing to step outside our comfort zones at times!
Break down the things that scare you, then figure out how to overcome them.
The first step is to identify what you're afraid of. If you're like me, you'll see that there may be some things that are small and manageable. But they seem overwhelming because there's so much uncertainty. While others are big and scary but manageable if we break them down into smaller problems.
Now it's time to talk to someone about what scares us. I know this sounds counterintuitive at first (you might even think I'm crazy) but hear me out. Talking through your fears with someone else can help you come up with strategies for overcoming them. One friend told me that when she was scared of something new or different, she talked it over with her husband as part of their nightly routine and he helped get her past the fear enough that she could actually do the thing in question!
Once we've identified what scares us and figured out how to overcome those fears (if they can be overcome), we need a plan for taking action. The best way I've found is setting aside one day per week where I focus on one thing from my list of aspirations or goals; once a month is good, too, if there are twelve items on your list!
Remind yourself of what courage feels like, then draw on that memory the next time you need it.
Remind yourself of what courage feels like, then draw on that memory the next time you need it.
You could also think about a situation in your life where you felt courageous and confident. Try to remember what it was like physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually at the time. That way, you can recreate that feeling whenever you need it again. For example, It’s really hard for me to ask for help. But when I think back to when I asked my business coach for help with scaling my business, I felt proud of myself. Because she helped me so much without making me feel silly, awkward, or ashamed that I didn’t already know everything there was about running a coaching business. So now, whenever I feel stuck on something, whether it’s figuring out the best way to introduce a new product or if I should retire an old product (which happened recently), I remember how bravely asking her did make me feel then. So now, whenever something comes up again where I need help figuring out new angles or new product, instead of getting frustrated all over again by thinking, "I still don't know the best way forward with this." Instead, I just keep remembering how good it felt back then and that makes me reminds me that I have what it takes.
Maybe this is not your journey after all.
Maybe this isn't your journey after all. Maybe you are where you need to be, and maybe this is exactly what you're supposed to be doing right now. Maybe your life has been pointing toward this moment for years, and maybe the only way forward is through the pain.
Maybe it's time to stop trying to change the past and start looking at the future instead. You can't change anything that happened in the past you can only learn from it so that you can become better at navigating whatever comes next.
Don't get stuck in a rut by dwelling on things that happened in your life before today; let them motivate you rather than hold you back from moving forward! Don't let them define who you are or dictate how far along your journey has gone!
Here are some ways to motivate yourself and get back on track when you're stuck in a rut.
Find your passion. This might seem like a no-brainer, but it's worth revisiting the question of why you're doing what you do. If you can't name a reason or motivation for sticking with something, the chances are that it's not really in line with your goals and priorities.
Make a plan that is attainable. Setting yourself up for failure by setting overly ambitious goals is counterproductive to getting motivated again, and it can be downright defeating if those plans fall through over and over again!
Find a mentor or coach who will keep encouraging you when things get tough, especially when those around don't understand why staying motivated is so important (or at least why it's so difficult). Remember: It doesn't matter how many people agree with what we say. All that matters is whether you agree with what you do next.
Set short-term goals as well as long-term ones sometimes, making progress towards one goal will lead us closer to another! For example: If I'm looking forward to a quality of life and living abroad five years from now but work towards being healthy today by exercising, eating healthy, and getting adequate sleep each week. Then I'll definitely be healthy and have the quality of life to make my dreams come true five years from now.
If you've been stuck in one spot for a while and would like to get out of it, here are some ideas that may help.
I know it can be hard getting out of your rut, but you're not alone. If you've been feeling like this for a while, there are some things that you can do right now to help get back on track.
Acknowledge the problem
It's important that we first acknowledge what is happening before we can do anything about it. Do you feel like you're trapped? Is there something holding you back from going forward? Identify what you want by asking yourself why this is so important to you, and write down all your answers whether they make sense or not.
Figure out what's stopping you
List all the things that might be stopping or slowing down your progress on whatever task at hand might be procrastination, anxiety over making mistakes or failure itself (when it comes to learning), and lack of motivation due in part because people around us aren't supportive or encouraging enough. Be honest with yourself if there are any excuses being used as reasons not being able to accomplish something which may sound familiar but actually doesn't hold water when examined closely enough (like "I'm too busy right now").
Be open to challenging your thinking
If there's something about your current situation that feels off, don't be afraid to change things up a bit, even if it seems scary! You might find that the changes will help you feel better than ever. Being open to challenge your thinking is key to getting unstuck. If you're willing to look at your situation from a different perspective and try something new, then it’s much more likely you'll be able to move forward.
Take a break
Sometimes when we're in a rut, we need a break so that our brains can recharge and come up with new ideas or solutions. Taking time off from work or other obligations helps us gain perspective on what's important and what isn't so important anymore (ahem: social media).
Start small
Chunk down your task and keep moving forward no matter how small the steps are at first! It's important not to overwhelm yourself with too many changes all at once—make a list of small changes that will help move things forward even if they don't seem like much yet individually. Then work through them one by one until they add up into something big enough for you to notice the difference and feel proud of your accomplishments!
It can be easy to get stuck in a rut (after all, human beings love patterns and routines). Even the most motivated people in the world can find themselves running low on energy, enthusiasm, or motivation. But it doesn't have to stay that way! There are plenty of ways you get unstuck to keep yourself motivated and excited about what you're doing.
Read more from Twanna Carter.
Twanna Carter, Ph.D., Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
An ICF Professional Certified Coach PCC) who works with busy women executives struggling with self-criticism, impostor syndrome, and stress to increase their mental fitness so that they can feel at ease again in their own skin and confidently enjoy the careers and life they've built.
Rather than coach symptoms, she leverages her coaching so that women work on the root causes that threaten to sabotage their career and life. Which means clients see immediate change resulting in decreased stress, increased confidence, and shifting from overwhelm to relaxation.
Recognized as an Office of Personnel Management Presidential Management Fellow, Twanna left full-time federal employment to be an entrepreneur. She is currently the CEO of Twanna Carter Professional & Personal Coaching, LLC.
