Written by: Marina Jankovic, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
We often hope for positive changes while carrying around the same negative belief. Anyone can convince themselves to go to a networking event, write a blog, go to the gym once or twice, but if you don't shift your belief about who you are, it is hard to achieve a sustainable change.
To develop new behaviours, we need to focus more on the process and act out of our desired identity. If we don’t change how we see ourselves, we will easily slip into our old behaviours and habits and consequently fail to achieve our goals, which then becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Far too many people walk through life following the norms attached to their identity and continuously add unhelpful identity stories. For example, you may set your financial goals, but if you say to yourself, “I am horrible at managing finances,” you will fail with your plan to reach financial abundance because you believe “that's simply not who I am.”
Why does this happen?
Because, subconsciously, you don't want to contradict yourself. You may start making and managing money better but then go back to your money-spender identity to confirm your current, “I am horrible at managing finances” belief.
In other words, your goals can make rational sense, but you will fail to reach them if they conflict with your perceived identity.
But when our positive action confirms our new identity, our brain will not resist change.
Here are some tips to start this process:
Recognise your unhelpful beliefs.
The first step to making progress is to recognise what’s holding you back from achieving your goals. The next step is to reframe your unhelpful beliefs. It takes time and effort but it is necessary to start making steps that will over time help you reach your goals.
Turn small wins into identity reinforcement.
To reinvent who you are, change what you do. Each positive change not only pushes you towards achieving your goal but also teaches you to trust yourself. Once your actions and identity are fully aligned, you will start to act like the person you believe yourself to be.
Focus on becoming, rather than getting a particular outcome.
To create lasting change, take actions that give you a sense of success every day, instead of seeing success as an end goal. Your reinvented way of ‘being’ will help you stay consistent with your new behaviours and over time achieve lasting positive results.
Focus on courage instead of confidence.
Don’t spend your life waiting for the time to be right and perfect. The perfect time is an illusion and a direct path to procrastination. Act now, then reflect and inform your next step. Create courageous moments to practice new behaviours instead of hoping to become confident as that moment might never come.
Read more about Why Traditional Goal Setting Doesn’t Work (brainzmagazine.com)
Marina Jankovic, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Marina Jankovic is a Master Coach and DE&I Leader with 17 years of international experience in Business Management, Learning & Development and Executive Education. She has managed a Global Talent and Diversity & Inclusion for a company operating in 180 markets and directly contributed to building a more diverse talent pipeline and inclusive culture.
Marina brings psychological depth and a multi-system perspective to her clients and has partnered with numerous private and public sector organisations, both in-house and as a consultant, helping them design and implement experiential learning programs and coaching culture.
Drawing from her own business and talent development experience, along with 3000+ executive coaching hours and hundreds of clients' stories, Marina identifies stepping stones towards creating a more significant impact in business and life.
She is the author of a best-selling book Your Time To Shine, a pearl of practical wisdom for women – and men – to create the lives they want, by choosing courage, leading authentically, and contributing to a better world for the generations to come.
