Written by: Dan Davis, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Does life ever feel like you are struggling to walk up a steep mountain? Do you find yourself feeling empty and unfulfilled? You might be living your life without the guiding force that successful, happy and wealthy people spend time uncovering. In this article, you will learn how to live a life guided by your true values.
Identifying your true values
It is common for people to go through life on autopilot; are you aware of the values that you hold and why you approach life in the way that you do? Your families values might have been instilled into you at an early age, you might find yourself trying to people please for that momentary hit of dopamine and oxytocin (people pleasing might have been modelled by your family and/or friends), or you might have no idea why you do what you do. Throughout my 5+ years of being a therapist, I have noticed that a lot of people are unclear on their values and go through life with a lack of awareness and understanding of self. It is important to start this journey by clarifying your values, identify your top 10 values by completing this Values Clarification worksheet.
It is time for you to take back control of your life and start to identify the true values that YOU hold, not what other people think you hold. I would suggest completing this values self-exploration worksheet, do a deep dive on your values, motivations and where you find purpose. Remember to ask yourself, is that my value? Does that feel right for me? If your values have been guided by other people then you might need to be honest with yourself, ask yourself honestly where these values are coming from.
Values can change throughout your life, depending on your life circumstances, what you do with your free time, and how you approach situations. While doing the values self-exploration worksheet, try to identify what you value right NOW. Do you value family, community, creativity, spirituality, or work? What do you spend the most time thinking about? Once you identify your values and what is important to you, then you can start taking action towards your dream life and living with purpose. If you can start to live each day guided by your values then you will start to feel less resistance and more flow with each action that you take.
Anxiety can be a guide
Anxiety is typically seen as a negative experience and a problem, but what if I told you that anxiety can help you understand your values even deeper. Why do you feel anxious about submitting an assignment? Why do you get anxious about social events? On the surface, you might say that this anxiety could be a fear or trauma response but it could also be telling you something about your values, you might be anxious about submitting your assignment because you value hard work and putting in your best effort, you might get anxious at social events because you feel disconnected from people and value connection and feeling like you belong (maybe you are lacking social connections – belonging is a basic psychological need).
Sometimes we can get anxiety missed up with other emotions, ask yourself honesty, am I anxious right now or just excited, tired, confused, or energised? Think back on times that you have felt anxious about something and ask yourself, what values were present during this situation or moment. If your anxiety is unmanageable and you are finding yourself feeling isolated and stressed, then feel free to reach out to Meta Minds Therapy for affordable, confidential and accessible therapy.
Living life with purpose
Living life with purpose is a conscious decision that you need to make, now that you have a deeper understanding of your values, it is time to live each day guided by your true values. Comparing yourself to someone else is going to deflate you and make you feel less authentic; remember that comparison is the thief of joy. Continue asking yourself, does this action align with MY values? Am I taking actions based on MY true values? You might have been conditioned to do things in a particular way, but this is now an opportunity for you to start living life authentically.
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Dan Davis, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Dan Davis is deeply passionate about helping people master their mindset. He is the host of 2 leading mental health podcasts, Meta Minds and The Power of Showing Up. Dan is also the host of Australia's 1 ranked drone YouTube channel, DansTube.TV. Dan has worked within the mental health and counselling industries for 5+ years, and has been dedicated to empowering clients through his counselling practice, Meta Minds Therapy. Dan has made it his mission to empower people to live the life of their dreams!
