Written by: Calvin Niles, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Early one December morning, I was driving down an icy motorway when I got the final sign that big changes needed to happen in my life – or I would suffer the consequences. It was a dark English morning in 2017 when my car aquaplaned at 70mph across four lanes of traffic. The car was a complete wreck. I was lucky to walk away with only minor injuries and I finally faced up to the truth that was staring me in the face all along – I was not living according to my life’s purpose.
Sometimes you may feel trapped, tired, and fed up with things and cannot find the energy to take meaningful steps forward in your lives. When things seem to go consistently wrong, and you feel that you are not living a purposeful life then there may be an opportunity to ponder on whether your life needs to shift and, if and when it does, how to recognize when that shift has moved you closer towards your purpose.
The Latin word for purpose in this context is Summum Bonum; translated as the highest or ultimate good. You can create more awareness about what your purpose is in life and how to find it if you focus on the ethical values that you hold. When you identify these, you create meaning much easier. I imagine that as you read this you have already illuminated some of these values and you are feeling the creative fire in you wanting to emerge. This then leads to the second part of this investigation – validation.
After I reflected on some of the stories of my life, I began to ask myself, “how do I know that I am living on purpose now?” If you want to look beyond your intuition for this answer, know that your life stories hold many gems, sometimes you just need to take a mindful step backward; zoom out and you will see. Here are three things that may help you know if you are living in greater accord with your purpose.
1. You find a state of flow.
You might have experienced being completely absorbed in an activity to the point where you feel merged with it. This is a mental state that psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi called flow. Achieving this state can help people feel greater enjoyment, energy, and involvement.
In William Butler Yeats' poem, Among School Children the poet famously asks, "How can we know the dancer from the dance"? In the flow state, it would be right to say that it is difficult to separate the art from the artist or the actor from the action! It is this merging that is the effect of being enmeshed with an activity that brings deep joy and so reflects your connection to your purpose.
2. You experience more synchronicities.
According to the renowned Swiss psychologist Carl Jung, synchronicities are not random. Instead, the occurrence of meaningful coincidences has a cause. Can you recall sending an email to someone who you had not spoken to for some time and receiving one at exactly the same time, and about subjects that you could never have predicted? Was it as if those emails touched somewhere in space as they traversed the world wide web? What about the money appearing out of the blue just at the time when you needed it most to pay that bill or make that urgent purchase? There is effortlessness in which events like this take place. And there are many more examples like these in the stories of our lives if we know not just how to look but how to see.
3. You experience more joy in your life.
“What are you laughing at?” I am often asked. To which I would normally answer, “everything just seems funnier these days.” It’s not just that you may laugh more, but you want to laugh more. When you are living on purpose, look for those moments where you seek laughter effortlessly. Notice how everything looks brighter and more colourful, notice the richer soundscape, and see that there is a greater depth of quality in those things that were once buried in the same old experiences. It gives much great context to French novelist Marcel Proust’s words, that "The real voyage of discovery consists, not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes."
This list is not exhaustive, but you can rest in the knowledge that the feedback you get from your life stories as the events unfold will bring a certain resonance to validate your path. You may see more traits such as kindness, generosity, love, empathy and forgiveness in all the little actions and experiences of your life which make up the lavish tapestry of your story. So, should you need evidence to support your intuition look for these cues to help you know that you are living your life on purpose.
Follow Calvin for more on stories, mindfulness, and poetry on his YouTube channel, connect with him on Instagram, Facebook, LinkedIn or visit his website for more.
Calvin Niles, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Calvin Niles is a communication coach known as The Mindful Storyteller, making a positive impact on the lives of leaders, entrepreneurs, coaches, and wider society through his services and products. Through his experience in mindfulness, storytelling, coaching, and business, he empowers others to be authentic and impactful in their communication. Calvin has worked with hundreds of people from leaders in large corporates to SMEs, and from solopreneurs to some of the top 10 charities in the UK.
