Gaëlle is a renowned Visibility & Confidence Coach empowering senior women leaders to be seen, recognised, and valued. She is the founder of A Rockstar Mindset, co-author of Women Making A Difference, and UK Ambassador for Psychologies magazine. Gaëlle has been featured in NBC, CBS, and Psychologies.
Gorgeous, have you ever noticed that while you’ve accomplished so much, some dreams still feel just out of reach? Deep down, you know you’re capable, yet something holds you back, and you can’t put your finger on it. You feel blocked, and maybe you’ve even started a healing journey to discover why.
The truth? Most of the time, a deep-rooted fear in your subconscious governs your thoughts, behaviours, and actions.
The great news? Once you uncover this fear, you begin to disempower a web of limiting beliefs, unhealthy habits, and thought patterns that no longer serve you.
There are two fears I wrestled with until I learned to love them and stop trying to ignore or suppress them: the fear of success and the fear of failure. I know these fears well. I’ve lived them, and I’ve helped my clients break free from their grip.
In this article, I’ll share my personal journey and insights to help you reframe failure, embrace the learning process, and reclaim your power.
Let’s get started, shall we?
The truth about fear
The thing about fears? They only exist if you believe they do. The moment you entertain the thought of failing, your mind seizes it as ammunition to keep you "safe", locked in your comfort zone, away from emotional risk.
That’s why fears are false evidence appearing real. It’s only when you entertain these thoughts that your mind engages in a repetitive cycle, convincing you this fear is real.
Why? Because your mind doesn’t distinguish between imagination and reality. That’s why your fears can truly hold you back. However, it also means that if you use your imagination well, you can create your reality daily.
The problem is, everything you want, desire, or crave is on the other side of fear. When you feel scared, the key is not to run but to recognise it as a sign that this is the right step to take.
Let me clarify: I’m referring to fears that hold you back from taking action, not visceral fears like fear of spiders or flying.
Now that we’re clear, let’s move forward. Your fears aren’t the enemy: they’re messengers, guiding you toward your next breakthrough. Your ego’s role is to protect you at any cost, and for this reason, it will use fear as ammunition to keep you safe.
The breakthrough? Once you’re aware of how your fears function and their purpose, you can take action more quickly.
The second breakthrough? Gorgeous, there’s no way around it. You have to feel your fear, emotionally speaking. Taking deep breaths and being supported during this time is fantastic because it will alleviate the sense of dread and worry coming upon you. Once you overcome it, you’ll realise, as Nelson Mandela said, “It always seems impossible until it’s done.”
The fear of failure
Failure, from my perspective, is not a failure; it’s a stepping stone to my success and part of any creative and learning process. Why? Because there is no mastery or excellence without repetition. Aristotle confirmed it when he said, “We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence is not an act but a habit.”
When I worked in Financial Services, I had a visceral fear of failure because, at the time, failure was seen as the end of the world. However, when I moved into entrepreneurship, I flipped this limiting belief on its head, focused on persevering, and saw it as a green light from the Universe that I was on the right path, a stepping stone to success.
Oprah Winfrey said, “Think like a queen. A queen is not afraid to fail. Failure is another stepping stone to greatness.”
For me, failure is the direct path to improvement, innovation, and mastery of my craft, which is directly linked to one of my values: excellence. Tony Robbins said, “There is no such thing as failure. There are only results.” These results will be the dots you connect to discover your success roadmap.
The fear of success
Gorgeous, I’ve been there. I know what it feels like. Why? Because it triggers your need to be in control and your fear of not being able to manage something bigger than you.
From my experience with success, I noticed a recurring pattern: you never become successful if you’re not ready to receive it. What does this mean? It means that if you believe you’re not worthy of success, you won’t receive it. As Oprah Winfrey said, “You become what you believe, not what you think or what you want.”
Secondly, if you play small or downplay your accomplishments, it is like you’re sending the message that you’re not worthy to receive more. So, the key is to ask yourself these questions:
What are you willing to do to be as successful as you want to be?
What are you willing to believe about yourself to embrace success?
What resistance are you willing to let go of now?
Thirdly, as a former Risk Manager working in Financial Services, if there is one thing I mastered, it is mitigating risk and taking calculated risks. I invite you to think like me:
What risks are you willing to take to create your vision without exhausting yourself?
What support are you willing to have to succeed?
Conclusion
Success and failure are two sides of the same coin. Both can trigger deep-seated fears that keep you playing small. However, when you learn the purpose and function of these fears, you can dismantle them and take action toward your goals and vision. The key is to cultivate a resilient mindset, which will help you overcome any obstacles and remain the Leader of your Mind.
Ready to cultivate a Rockstar Mindset, overcome visibility barriers, and make your impact? Let’s talk. Book a call with me today here.
Read more from Gaëlle Berruel
Gaëlle Berruel, Visibility & Confidence Coach, Motivational Speaker
Gaëlle is a leader in visibility and confidence coaching for senior women leaders. Seven years ago, she hid behind her laptop, longing to help women be recognised for their work and value.
Without a roadmap to visibility from a place of authority and authenticity, she created one, becoming the fullest expression of herself: radiant, fulfilled, and unapologetic. Today, as the CEO of A Rockstar Mindset, she empowers women to be visible, recognised, and make an impact. Gaëlle is a multi-award-winning coach, a sought-after speaker, and a best-selling author featured in top global publications. Her mission: You're a diamond in the rough. Let me help you to become the Rockstar of your life.
