How I Reclaimed My Life After Trauma
- Brainz Magazine
- 4 hours ago
- 5 min read
Written by Karen Leigh, Mindset Coach & Hypnotherapist
Karen Leigh works with your powerful subconscious mind using Hypnotherapy & NLP to turn your self-worth and self-belief all the way up! She is the founder of Soul Sanctuary Glasgow, a place where you can enjoy mindfulness classes and connect with like-minded souls!
Trauma is a word we often associate with extremes, but what if it’s also quietly shaping your everyday life? What if it’s influencing your confidence, your choices, your relationships, without you even realising it? As someone who’s walked the long road from self-doubt to self-worth, I’ve learned that healing doesn’t always start with dramatic change; it begins with understanding. In this article, I share not just what trauma really is, but how we can begin to free ourselves from the weight it carries.
What is trauma?
Since embarking on my own healing and growth journey many years ago, a rebel has emerged from within me, one that wants to break down the barriers and shame that surround trauma since, in fact, it is something that most of the population has experienced in some form.
I have a desire and drive to not only normalise talking about our traumas but to provide the knowledge and education on what trauma is, and how we can begin to address and overcome it, no longer allowing it to dominate our decisions and habits, which have a profound effect on our future.
There may be a misconception that trauma means a big, significant event (or a series of events) where something traumatic has happened in our lives. However, it does not necessarily have to be a major event. Trauma, essentially, is anything that prompts you to feel hurt, sad, or fearful; even feelings of anger and guilt can be the result of trauma we have experienced. And of course, people do experience extraordinary life changes and hardships due to a traumatic event. That is why I shout from the rooftops that we can take our power back and refuse to allow trauma to affect the quality of our lives!
For me, my childhood traumas came from feeling unloved and from being mocked when I expressed my quirky personality and my inner thoughts and feelings. I was asked at age 13, by a trusted adult, what I wanted to be once I left school. I replied that I wanted to be a dancer, and said this with so much confidence and belief in myself. I am sure many of you reading can relate to a similar experience. There was no doubt in my mind that I would go on to achieve this, until it was shot down, and I was told that I needed a plan B, in a tone that made my dream feel ridiculous. I gave up, on my daydreams and on any efforts in high school.
I began to suppress my personality, my views, and opinions for fear of being laughed at or mocked. My self-worth became non-existent, as did my self-belief in my capabilities and possibilities for my future. This affected the jobs I’d go on to do and how I viewed my potential for progressing in my roles. It affected my friendships, romantic relationships, and what I tolerated. And it affected how I saw myself; I did not see the magic inside of me. I was so lost and unfulfilled. The traumas I’d experienced were affecting my quality of life and the future I deserved.
Down the NLP rabbit hole
At age 30, when my children were two and three years old, I decided I wanted to go to university. I chose psychology initially, as I was fascinated with the human mind. However, that same trusted adult from before told me, “Don’t study psychology, there’s really not a demand for psychologists right now.” And, having not addressed any traumas or their consequent effect on my belief system yet, I listened, and I got my degree in business management instead.
Then came 2020. I’m sure we all re-evaluated our lives in some way during that year! For me, I had been reading personal development books for many years by this point, aiming to better my mind, body, and soul. In 2020, I found NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming), and down the rabbit hole I went!
In NLP, we learn about the power of our subconscious and unconscious mind. You see, our subconscious mind is running 24/7 and is soaking up everything in our environment, what we are reading, watching, and listening to.
These all have an effect on our thoughts (self-talk), beliefs, emotions, and habits. So imagine what our subconscious mind was soaking up during our traumatic experiences, and how these affected us going forward! These memories and emotions are all still in there, in our unconscious mind, even if we don’t consciously think of them for many years.
NLP and hypnosis are tools we can use to access and communicate with our unconscious mind, removing any emotional blocks and mindset limitations that we subconsciously had taken on due to trauma.
In NLP, it is believed that you do not have to talk about any traumas at great length. When we talk about it, our body responds, and it is like reliving these experiences. We do, however, want to acknowledge any trauma; these were important events, often with detrimental consequences.
They should absolutely be acknowledged. And then, you can take the learnings from them, which are positive and productive for your future!
Once you’ve done this, you can begin to reprogram your beliefs about your capabilities and possibilities. You will find it easier and more effortless to tap into the self-worth you were born with. You can begin to feel the emotions that feel good for you; they were always in there!
Taking your power back, how amazing is that!
It was inevitable that I would go on to devour as much information as I could, completing the intense training and exams to become an expert in NLP. It not only sees transformations for my clients, but it has had such a profound impact on my own life, too!
I’ve done things in the last eight years that teenage me couldn’t have comprehended: homeschooled while building a business, public speaking, running mindfulness classes to share this work with like-minded women, starting a podcast, selling my home, car, and belongings, and taking my children on an adventure abroad.
The world is our oyster, and when we see someone else achieve great things, they are being the example that you can do it too!
Baby steps all the way. Start with noticing your thoughts, get curious about where they came from, and why they hold you back. Sit with all the feels. There is no such thing as a ‘negative’ emotion; it is just your body's way of communicating with you that something needs to be addressed or acknowledged.
I’m so grateful to every version of me and what she experienced. It got me here, where I have the self-belief and worthiness to create the reality I love and deserve, finally.
Read more from Karen Leigh
Karen Leigh, Mindset Coach & Hypnotherapist
Karen Leigh is a leader in the power of our subconscious mind, and works with you to change your inner world, resulting in the outer world you desire!
After overcoming her own limiting beliefs about her capabilities and possibilities in the world, and turning her self-worth all the way up. She has exceeded her own expectations of what was possible in life, experiencing true adventure, friendship and pushing boundaries in life, and would love to live in a world where her peers are fulfilled and content too!
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