Written by: Jane Christine, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Everyone wants a quick fix! Some people spend so much time researching on how to reach their end goals quicker that they could have used that time to truly invest in themselves. Most don’t want to do the hard work to get to their goals. Most want others to do it for them.
It’s been engraved into our entitled and accelerated culture. We believe we deserve everything and are owned by society. I agree that yes, we do deserve everything but not by some quick-fix scheme – the hard work is where the true transformation happens.
There is a reason why the self-improvement industry is estimated to grow into a $13.2 billion industry by 2022. So why is the industry so lucrative? Why are bookstores now filled with self-help books? It’s because most people don’t want to put in the effort to truly transform. But it’s not their fault; it’s simply the culture they’ve been raised in. We don’t know any better when we haven’t been challenged on our values and beliefs. We have so many beliefs that were absorbed in our childhood years that we have taken on as our own set of values. But have you really looked to see if these values align with the person you are today or the person you want to be tomorrow?
“People have the right intentions by wanting to improve and grow – it’s the way they are trying to do it where it all comes undone.”
Sometimes when people are so desperate for help, they turn to self-help books, but then they are left feeling worse than before they picked up the book. Why is that? It has to do with the way they are consuming. Let’s take food, for example; we all need it to survive. But how we consume, it can alter our mood, mindset, health and body. If we are eating healthy, nutritious food, we will feel satisfied, energized, and usually feel stability in our emotions. However, when we go on a binge and eat sugar-loaded food, we will almost always feel terrible, lack energy, feel sad or unhappy, and not only because of the food itself but how we consumed it – what was the reason and intention behind it? The way you consume anything will have a direct effect on the outcome.
Before you get sucked into the self-help industry, assess where you are currently at, what your motivation is for wanting to improve. If the motivation is external, for example, you want to lose weight, so others accept you, the change might not have longevity as your motivation is dependent on others. Whereas if you shifted your mindset and reframed your motivation into something that was only dependent on yourself, say I want to lose weight to feel good when I walk into a room. Your transformation is about you – not from an external force.
“Learnings will only lead to transformation when it’s put into practice.”
I am an advocate of true transformation; my career is based on helping others transform into the best version of themselves. However, this takes place in a safe space, in a non-judgemental zone, filled with positive intentions, compassion and a deep understanding of why they do what they do and how to change their actions to best serve their wants and needs. Creating this same environment for yourself can be easy when you have an awareness of your current state of mind, be kind and gentle towards yourself, and leave your self-criticism at the door. Of course, this is easier said than done, however as with anything, you need time to learn. But don’t stop there – this is where the difference comes into the play – learnings will only lead to transformation when it’s put into practice. Reach for those self-help books when you are ready to practice what you learn.
“Consistency creates habits and habits turn into default behaviours.”
Your true transformation takes place when you are by yourself - alone with your thoughts and feelings, and in your everyday life where consistency creates habits and habits turn into default behaviors. It will happen over time, gradually. Remember, it has taken years to learn these habits and behaviors, it’s going to take some time to alter and retrain your mind. You won’t see the change overnight, but there will be a point in time when you will be thrown a challenge and you will notice that you didn’t go down the path you used to. This is the moment you will know that all your hard work, dedication and consistency have led you to this point – your default mode has been reprogrammed and you now do something different than you would have before.
You will know you’ve truly transformed when others you haven’t seen in a while will need to get to know you again, as the person you are today. You’ll know when your patterns have changed instinctually, and you no longer need to make a conscious decision for healthy habits. You’ll know you’ve truly transformed when you’ve reached those milestones you set for yourself so long ago.
Jane Christine, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Jane Christine is a certified Life Coach, NLP Master Practitioner and author. Originally from Australia working in the corporate world, until she questioned her life's purpose. Jane believed there had to be more to life, so she sold everything she owned and set off for a nomadic lifestyle traveling around the world searching for answers and a place to call home, which she finally found in Spain. Her search and transformation took her to over 37 countries. Life experiences and her own personal growth guided her to become a certified Life Coach, her travels inspired her quest to learn about the world around us and why we do what we do. Since 2012, Jane Christine has been studying how our pasts shape us, the effects of societal standards, and the impact of values. With the techniques of Neuro-Linguistics Programming and through the power of transformation learn how to; bridge the gap, define self-worth, set tangible goals, find comfort through change, and how 1% micro-changes can alter lives. Jane Christine is the author of "How You Know Already: Questions to ask yourself to find the answers within" as she believes we are all unique and so are each of our paths to follow. She is dedicated to her clients and supporting their growth and journey. Her motto: Design your life, don't just live it!