Written by Reah R. Hagues, Relationship/Holistic Coach
Reah is a wife to Quintin and a mother to 5 humans and 3 pets. She is the daughter of Kim (or Ma to her) and a big sister to Raven.
Happy Holiday season! I have seen many articles on mental health, holiday travels, and even holiday stress management; however, I have noticed a lack of holiday mental health help articles and decided to contribute one! I hope you find this article to be helpful, informative, and life-improving. This article will focus on three areas of focus to help you not just survive, but successfully navigate and improve your mental health during the holidays and even after.
Let’s first acknowledge that mental health is not just focused on stress. Mental health is concerned with our physical and emotional well-being. Our mental health can affect scale things like stress level, eating habits, spending habits, and even emotional responses to stress and life events to larger things like physical/mental illness/disease, job/income loss, withdrawal from family/interests, and even suicide/death. Our mental health can be impacted year-round, but for some, the holiday season can be a rougher time and impact mental health even more.
Acknowledge your mental state. Is there a current struggle? What is the first area of focus you need to target to improve your overall mental well-being during the holidays? Here are three example areas of focus that can help to improve your mental health, keep it at a healthy level, and stay focused after the holidays:
Sorting/prioritizing finances
You do not have to buy gifts for people. I have to say that in caps because I know this is a huge problem for people (myself, at times included). We often think of holidays as spending money, whether it be on hosting, travel, kids, etc. Spending is not a requirement. Look at it this way, having to tell people NO for 2-3 months is worth having financial stability, mental clarity, and emotional comfort. The holidays are extremely commercialized, that is an unavoidable fact. We can put our efforts into better things than spending money and do so with no guilt, like movie/game night with the kids, Zoom/FaceTime parties with family who require distant travel (I have done this, and I promise it works!), or even cooking at home more using cookie cutters to make sandwiches shaped like Christmas trees rather than spending money in a crowded restaurant. Kids and family value time, even if kids do not want to admit it!
Holiday scheduling/prioritizing time
It is impossible to be everywhere everyone wants you to be. And sometimes it is better for your mental health not to be. We also are only capable of completing the amount of tasks we can successfully complete, in the time we have. Whether it be kids, spouses, work, friends, or family, make the time fit that is best for your mental, physical, emotional, and financial wellbeing. I know it sounds silly or maybe difficult to keep up with, but calendars/note apps have been super helpful for me in remembering certain things. Utilize these apps on your phone (or on paper if you prefer) to schedule focus times on this area. Understand and communicate that you may have to say not to some activities. This is important in prioritizing your mental health and even, at times, physical health (winter germs and all). It is okay to say no, and it is okay to avoid stressful people, places, and things.
Struggling with alcohol/substance use/abuse
This one requires a little more intention and long-term focus. I would like to start by saying that if you or a loved one are struggling with alcohol/substance abuse, I urge you to reach out, and I can connect you with a support group/resource. The holidays can have a negative impact on those of us who struggle with addiction/abuse. Aside from other addictions such as food, spending, gambling, etc., alcohol and drug use can increase over the holidays as stress increases. Activities where alcohol/drugs are present and feel unavoidable due to family influence can trigger and even alter recovery for some. The most important action to take is to avoid all possible triggers, even family. It may be time to place holiday plans elsewhere and away from those who influence a negative trajectory in your recovery journey. You can also contact your support group/mentor to set up a meeting for others like you who also want to avoid unhealthy holiday scenarios.
With a little hard work, consistency, and acceptance of available support, you can skate through the holiday season, leaving you happy, healthy, and successful! We at Falolity LLC are available for support, mentorship, coaching, and more helpful tips year-round.
Reah R. Hagues, Relationship/Holistic Coach
Reah is a wife to Quintin and a mother to 5 humans and 3 pets. She is the daughter of Kim (or Ma to her), and big sister to Raven. Reah has earned multiple degrees including a Bachelor's degree in Christian studies, Master's degree in Psychology, Master's degree in Holistic Mental Health and Wellness (with emphasis on family dynamics), and a Master's level certification in Life Coaching.
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