Written by: Aura E. Martinez, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Regarding relationships, we tend to focus more on our relationships with others and ways to improve them since the quality of our relationships with others dramatically impacts our overall well-being. However, there is one relationship that none of us can afford to ignore because it is the basis of every relationship we have with others. This relationship that I am referring to is THE relationship that dictates everything in our lives and is the only relationship we will always have for the rest of our life, and that is our relationship with ourselves.
Before I dive into how you can have a better relationship with yourself, I will first explain why your relationship with yourself is so meaningful. For starters, if this relationship isn't healthy, no other relationship can ever work, nor will you be able to manifest the life you seek.
How you view yourself, and your life will dictate what you allow or don't allow, how you view others and your interaction with them, and how good you are willing to let life get. It affects your self-esteem and self-concept, how you speak and treat yourself, and how you allow others to treat you, and this is just a concise list to describe the impact that your relationship with yourself has on the overall quality of your life. For this reason, you must always seek a great relationship with yourself. So, here are the ways to better your relationship with yourself:
1. Spend more time with yourself.
Take the time to get to know yourself. Take the time to understand your thoughts, feelings, and how your inner being responds or reacts to certain situations. Giving yourself time allows you to be seen, heard, and understood. In the end, this is what we all crave and need from others ‒ to be seen, heard, and understood. Everything mentioned above is part of you loving yourself. In essence, the same thing that you would do for others is what you would do for yourself. Just like you give your friends and partner time and attention, you also provide that to yourself. The more time you spend getting to know yourself, the more you will understand what you need to do or not do to be genuinely happy.
2. Give yourself the love and compassion you would give someone else.
The kind of love you would give others, start giving that to yourself. The type of attention you would give to others, start giving that to yourself. If you love it when your companion gives you flowers, start buying yourself flowers. If you love it when a friend cheers you on, start cheering yourself. As you start doing this for yourself, you will notice that your cup will fill up, and you will feel loved. When you ensure your needs are met, you see yourself more clearly. Treating yourself with love and compassion lets you know how you are loved and perfectly made.
3. Start journaling.
Start journaling or recording all your thoughts and feelings. The whole purpose of this is to do a dump. Many times, the reason why we feel so burdened, and heavy inside is that we are carrying so much junk. It's time to get rid of the gunk! The healthiest and safest way is through journaling or recording if you are not much of a writer. Doing this daily helps you sort out all that is happening within, making you feel lighter and better. The great thing about a journal is that you won't feel judged, it's safe, and you can later read what you wrote to do some reflection. Journaling is also a loving act on your part because this is self-care.
Journaling helps you improve your relationship with yourself by giving yourself the attention you deserve by getting rid of all the gunk inside you. Getting rid of the gunk ensures you are in flow and harmony inside you. When you are in flow and balanced, you can do good for yourself on many levels.
4. Have healthy conversations with yourself.
Having a healthy discussion with yourself is not advising you to start talking to yourself out loud. Whether you are aware of this or not, you are constantly having conversations with yourself in your mind. For this reason, it's essential to be mindful of what you are saying to yourself. Make sure your thoughts align with the person you aspire to be and the things you want to have in your life. Thoughts and conversations like "I am capable of doing this" and "I love improving my skills" instead of "I can't do this or that" or "this is too hard for me" will help increase your self-confidence in yourself.
Remember, what you say to yourself affects the way you think. How you think affects the way you feel. How you feel affects what you do, and what you do creates your reality. So, be very mindful of what's going on in your mind.
Taking the time to improve your relationship with yourself will lead you to discover yourself in ways you never thought possible. What you discover may lead you to a more purposeful and passionate life.
Your relationship with yourself is the one you will have for the rest of your life. Make sure you make it a good one because you are the most significant factor in living a great life and attracting the things you want.
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Aura E. Martinez, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Aura E. Martinez is a Self-Discovery and Empowerment Coach helping women gain total clarity in their purpose so that they can wake up to a daily life of fulfillment and certainty. As a person who has traveled the world as a Flight Attendant, the opportunity has helped her learn and see so much and she discovered the most fabulous place for us all to see that is truly the key to greater well-being and she shared that with others worldwide.
She is also the founder of Live to the Max™/Viva al máximo™, author of the book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve and the journal Creating a Lifetime of Wellness Journal: Your Personal Coach to the Different Areas of Your Life. The book has been seen in Spirituality & Health magazine, Psychology Today, and Natural Awakenings NYC edition magazine.
