Written by: Kathleen Kelley, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
I am obsessed with the concept of Grace these days. Why?
This is part two of a four-part series: Grief, Grace, Gratitude and Growth. This series came about as I’ve struggled with the inevitable loss of my dog, Trooper. Watching his slow decline got me thinking about grief. And then what? We grieve and then…move on? Get over it? Figure it out?
I did not want to sit in grief until his inevitable journey off this earth. Right now, I allow grief when it comes and hope for grace the rest of the time.
What does that mean though? Grace?
In the yogic tradition grace is often associated with Lakshmi, the goddess of Abundance and Good Fortune. According to Merriam-Webster, Grace is, “unmerited divine assistance given to humans”.
Douglas Brooks writes in a favorite text of mine, “The nature of life is change.” To me, the ability to accept change epitomizes grace.
I’ve decided that giving myself grace, both during the hard times and after the loss, is an act of self-love. I get to allow grace, no apologies or explanations required.
How does grace look? Feel?
For me, grace is a gift we give ourselves. Grace to be myself. Grace to succeed OR fail…either way I’m out there taking a swing at the ball, HARD. Grace to love my children so hard AND sometimes fall short as a mom (yes, I drove her to get the belly button piercing). Grace to enjoy life AND complain sometimes. Grace to be in love AND question if I’m worthy or capable of doing it right. Grace to hold back OR plow forward, it’s up to me.
Life takes place on BOTH sides of the court…and when I ALLOW, when I give myself grace, I am calmer. Notice I didn’t say happier. Because I’m only happy half the time. I’m crabby AF the other half. And I’m calm because I allow feelings. I give myself grace for all the emotions. And guess what? Sometimes I hit an ace and sometimes, the ball sinks right into the net.
As a person who allows feelings and gives grace for the entire wheel of possibilities, I tend to be even keel. For that grace, I get put in charge of committees, get to be a go between with my children and their father and always make the dinner reservations. Not always fun, see?
And that’s the rub about grace…when I give myself grace, I get to be comfortable and uncomfortable. I get to be happy and sad. I get…to be.
When is the last time you allowed yourself to JUST BE?
Need help giving yourself Grace? Try my course, “Stress and Overwhelm: Causes, Coping and Cures.” It contains a meditation practice designed to help you process a feeling, which is the beginning of the journey to grace. Click here.
Better yet, book a call. I am a stress management coach for people in health care. As practitioners, learning to give ourselves grace opens the door to peace and calm at work, no matter what is happening. I’d love to connect with you 1:1. Click here to book a free call:
Even after all this time, The Sun never says to the Earth, “You owe me.” Look what happens with a love like that. It lights up the whole sky. – Hafiz
Kathleen Kelley, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Dr. Kelley is a professor of physical therapy, certified yoga teacher, certified neuro sculpting facilitator and certified life coach. She is CEO and owner of Kathleen Kelley Coaching. Dr. Kelley received her BS in physical therapy from the University of Connecticut, her MS in neurology from Boston University and her Doctorate in education from the University of Sarasota. Dr. Kelley’s passion for neurology, brain health, wellness and the importance of self-care led her to create her unique coaching program. She draws on her skills to empower individuals to shift their mindset, take control of their lives, set boundaries, say no and level up their lives by changing their thoughts. Dr. Kelley’s philosophy is anyone can change their mindset.
