Written by: Holly Mosack, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
I always know when Mother’s Day is approaching because my social feed is bombarded with flower ads and jewelry commercials take over the TV screen. As a mom who wears a silicone wedding band and struggles to keep even a cactus alive, these types of Mother’s Day gifts are underwhelming. Back when we were first married, my husband would send me a flower bouquet on the standard holidays, and I would politely thank him, but really, I was thinking, what a waste of money. Eventually, he learned my frugal spirit, and the last bouquet he sent, the card attached, simply said, “I know, I know…”
Perhaps your mom loves flowers and bracelet charms – if so, great! You’ve got it easy. But when I asked fellow moms what they’d like for Mother’s Day this year, those didn’t even make a list. So, this year, if you want to make your Mom/significant other/just a cool mom, you know, happy, try getting her a gift that speaks her language.
I’m referring to Gary Chapman’s book, The 5 Love Languages. Everyone gives and receives love differently. Think about your spouse. What does she typically respond to? What makes her happy? How does she often show her love? That’s her love language.
Here are a few ideas for each love language to get you thinking:
1. Words of Affirmation. Write her a note or make her a card, telling her why she is such a great mom. If you aren’t very good with writing how you feel, pick out a sentimental greeting card. Don’t get me wrong, I love funny cards, but that doesn’t fulfill the need when your language is words of affirmation. Give her a shout-out on social media (make sure you choose a flattering picture of her). Or go old school, and tell her! Make a list of ten things you love about her and recite the list to her.
2. Acts of Service. Moms do a lot, and they are rarely thanked. This is your opportunity to pick up the slack. Do things without being asked. Instead of just helping out on Mother’s Day, which is a Sunday when things are typically slower anyway, do things the entire week. Pack the lunches, do the laundry, help with homework, and make the dinners. Don’t have time? Hire someone to clean the house. Take her car to get detailed since she’s probably the one shuttling the kids everywhere. Tell her to give you a “honey-do” list and get the list done. I would say 90% of the women I talked to said they wanted some act of service.
3. Receives Gifts. Depending on the mom, this could be either easy or hard. The trick is to pay attention to see what she is complaining about or what catches her eye. Surely, over the next several weeks, she will hint at something she needs or would love to have without even thinking about Mother’s Day.
4. Quality Time. It’s Mother’s Day, so of course, the mom should want to spend quality time with her kids, right? Some moms want nothing more than a day with their kids, and other moms want nothing more than a day away from their kids! Perhaps she enjoys quality time with her friends but never can coordinate schedules. Talk to her friends’ spouses - it would be amazing if you all planned a weekend friends’ getaway for them. If the mom in your life likes quality time with her kids, then plan something for them. Don’t make her plan her Mother’s Day. And don’t make it a chore for her.
If she is always taking her kids' places, perhaps you join her, but you prepare everything, keep the kids in check, etc., and even take some candid shots of her interacting with her kids. I talked to one of my best friends recently about how the moms are never in any pictures with their kids because they’re always the ones taking the photos. So, snap a couple of candid shots and frame them so she can remember this special Mother’s Day.
5. Physical Touch. During this quality time, hold her hand, scratch her back, brush her hair. Give her a real hug, not one of those quick pats on the back hugs. Rub her feet, or better yet, give her a massage. Sit next to her on the couch and let her drape her legs across yours. It’s a small gesture, but it can go a long way.
If you don’t know your mom’s love language, I guess you’ll have to try them all. I’m sure she won’t complain. Oh, and if my husband is reading this, my “honey-do” list is on the kitchen counter.
Holly Mosack, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
When Holly ended her career in the United States Army, she struggled to find her purpose in the civilian world (outside of being a mom) until she and her husband started a CrossFit gym. She quickly found a new passion in helping women become stronger, both physically and emotionally. She wants to empower women to stay active by removing barriers, which is why she founded a line of leak-proof apparel, Moxie Fitness Apparel, to help the 1 in 3 women who experience stress incontinence. Holly is an executive-level communicator with 15 years of manufacturing experience in talent acquisition strategy, service quality, and continuous improvement. She holds a bachelor’s degree in journalism from Northwestern University and is a CrossFit Level I Trainer.
