Esther Janssen is a certified Tantra massage therapist specialising in healing women's trauma. Her own experiences of emotional abuse during childhood, as well as sexual assaults and rape as an adult, led her to her calling as a healer through the process of overcoming her own traumas.
Shame–it’s a whisper in the quiet corners of our hearts, a weight that often goes unspoken yet profoundly shapes how we view ourselves and our bodies. For many of us, this silent burden influences our relationship with our sexuality, our self-image and our very sense of worth.
But what if there was a gentle, powerful way to release this shame and rediscover the inherent beauty and wisdom of our bodies? This is where the transformative practice of tantra massage can offer a path to healing…
The roots of shame
Shame around our bodies and sexuality often runs deep, stemming from various sources:
Societal expectations and media portrayals that may not reflect our reality
Past experiences or relationships that left emotional scars
Cultural or religious teachings that may have complicated our relationship with our bodies
A lack of open, nurturing conversations about our bodies and natural processes
These factors can lead us to feel disconnected from our bodies, uncertain about our desires, or perhaps unworthy of pleasure and love. But it’s important to remember: these feelings are not your truth. They’re stories we’ve been told or have told ourselves, and like all stories, they can be rewritten.
Understanding shame’s impact
Shame doesn’t just affect how we feel about ourselves; it can have far-reaching consequences on our lives as well…
It can hinder our ability to form deep, intimate connections with others
It may lead to avoidance of medical check-ups or self-care practices
Shame can fuel negative self-talk and low self-esteem
And it can often result in physical tension and stress in the body
Recognising these impacts is the first step towards healing. It’s important to approach this recognition with compassion for yourself, understanding that shame is a learned response, not an inherent truth about who you are.
The healing touch of tantra massage
Tantra massage offers a unique and powerful approach to healing our shame. Unlike traditional massages or purely sensual practises, tantra massage is a holistic, therapeutic experience that combines mindful touch with spiritual and emotional healing.
Ways in which tantra massage can help in overcoming shame
Creating a safe space: In a tantra massage session, you’re provided with a judgement-free environment where you can simply be. There are no expectations to perform or to be anyone other than who you truly are.
Reconnecting with your body: Through gentle, unintentional touch, tantra massage helps you rediscover your body as a source of wisdom and pleasure rather than something to be ashamed of.
Practising self-acceptance: As you receive loving touch without conditions, you begin to internalise a sense of worthiness and self-love.
Releasing stored emotions: Our bodies very often hold onto past traumas and negative emotions. Tantra massage can help release these stored emotions that we’ve been keeping inside, allowing for deep emotional healing.
Empoweringyour sexuality: By exploring your body in a safe, non-sexual context, you can begin to reclaim your sexuality as a natural, beautiful part of who you are.
The journey of healing
Healing shame through tantra massage is a journey, not a destination. The process is about slowly unlearning harmful beliefs and replacing them with self-love and acceptance. As an example, here are some experiences shared by women who’ve embarked on this path:
“For the first time, I felt truly seen and accepted. It was like my body could finally exhale.” – Anna, 34
“I used to avoid mirrors. Now, I can look at myself and appreciate the strength and beauty of my body.” – Maria, 42
“Tantra massage helped me realise that my pleasure matters. I’m worthy of love and touch, just as I am.” – Lena, 29
Embracing your wholeness
As you begin to heal shame through tantra massage, you may notice shifts in your relationships with yourself and others. These shifts can manifest as:
A growing comfort with your body and sexuality
A blossoming self-confidence and ability to express your needs
Improved intimate relationships based on genuine connection
A deeper sense of connection to your feminine energy
An overall sense of well-being and joy in life
Remember, your body is not an object to be judged but a sacred vessel that carries you through life. It deserves love, respect and care–starting with your own gentle acceptance.
Your next step towards healing
If you’re feeling drawn to explore tantra massage as a path to healing shame, know that you’re not alone. Many women have walked this path before you, finding liberation, self-love, and a renewed connection with their bodies.
Are you ready to begin your journey of healing? If so, I invite you to reach out for a consultation with me. In this safe, confidential space, we can discuss your unique experiences and how tantra massage might support your path to overcoming shame and reclaiming your wholeness.
Remember, you are worthy of love, pleasure, and acceptance exactly as you are–in this very moment. Your journey to healing starts with a single, brave step. Will you take it?
(P.S.: You can also download my free Meditation Guide here. I also invite you to keep an eye out for my soon-to-be-released book about healing. It’s currently in the final phase of being reviewed by experts in various fields, such as psychotherapy, trauma therapy, and spirituality. I am still looking for a publisher who can help me release it both nationally and internationally. I hope you find the Meditation Guide useful and the right tool to help you begin your healing journey!)
Disclaimer: This article is for informational purposes only and does not constitute medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. The information provided herein is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have before undertaking any treatments.
Read more from Esther Janssen
Esther Janssen, Certified Tantric Trauma Healer for Women
Her own experiences of emotional abuse during childhood, as well as sexual assaults and rape as an adult, led her to her calling as a healer through the process of overcoming her own traumas. She has empowered hundreds of women from many countries on their journeys to self-love and healing. Her mission is to guide people through the process of healing women’s collective wounds.
