Kathryn Peruga, the founder of Changewell Therapies is passionate about providing accessible therapy for all. She blends evidence-based psychology with subconscious therapy to overcome overwhelm and anxiety, and as a mother, wife & homemaker, she empowers others with transformative strategies.
Do you feel as though your mind is paralysed even though you have so many things you need or want to get done? Perhaps your ‘to-do’ list feels impossible. Maybe even the well-intended New Year's resolutions have somehow become another thing left unchecked, adding to your frustration. Don’t worry. It’s time to pause and take a deep breath. You're not alone. So many people begin to experience this debilitating feeling known as emotional overwhelm, particularly around this time of year. The pressure to ‘start fresh,’ be better, do more, and achieve everything at once can be crushing. But the good news is that overwhelm doesn’t have to control you. By the end of this short article, you will have a toolkit of 9 simple strategies to make yourself feel better.
What is emotional overwhelm?
Imagine your mind as glass for a moment, as the thoughts, tasks, emotions, and feelings flow into your glass-like water. There comes a point when this glass is full, but the thoughts, tasks, emotions, and feelings keep coming, causing everything to overflow and spill out. It’s at this stage that no matter how hard you try to focus on things you need to do, it’s too difficult to organise your thoughts in a productive manner. This causes more unpleasant sensations and feelings, which in turn adds more pressure. And then the cycle has begun, here we are stuck, drowning in a seemingly impenetrable loop, paralysed and unable to action anything. It is this inescapable sensation that makes emotional overwhelm different from generic stress.
What are the symptoms?
A range of things happen to the brain when we experience the symptoms of emotional overwhelm, as highlighted in Figure 1 below.
The main areas of the brain affected by anxiety
We can see immediately that the prefrontal cortex highlighted in green, our management system responsible for organising and prioritising, is largely affected by emotional overwhelm. It is likely causing that paralytic feeling preventing us from actioning tasks. Similarly, we can see the limbic system (blue) or the emotional centre of the brain, and the brain stem (red), responsible for our survival instincts, are also implicated in emotional overwhelm. It’s no wonder feelings of despair and hopelessness followed by a desire to escape or lash out take over when we’re experiencing emotional overwhelm. Looking at the Brain areas in this way also explains other common symptoms such as feeling tearful, irritable, forgetful, and anxious with a faster heart rate and breathing, headaches, stomach ache, and sleep disturbances. Emotional Overwhelm is very real. The effects of this condition can feel awful. Learning how to calm your own storm isn’t that difficult, and the results are extremely liberating. Here’s how:
1. Press pause
Yes, pause everything. Pause from all tasks, and put your phone away. Pause from social media, calls and emails. This doesn’t necessarily need to be a huge pause, maybe just one day or the weekend. Plan to do nothing. Some of my clients benefit from a planned morning off, whereas others need one whole week. You are in control of your pause button. Create the time you need. Communicate this with the people who matter ( for example, family, friends, work commitments) so that you can truly switch off during this time.
2. Breathing
Controlling breath is crucial and will quickly help with the physiological side effects of emotional overwhelm (raised heart rate, rapid breathing, tension headaches, anxiety, tummy pains, muscle aches, and pains). The health benefits of deep breathing for just 5 minutes a day are paramount and far-reaching.
3. Affirm positivity
Be your own saviour and tell yourself what you need to hear! Perhaps write down all the good things about yourself. Reassure yourself with your own pre-recorded voice. Or listen to an abundance of affirmations available on YouTube. You could do one step better and listen to prerecorded therapy audio tracks that use healing frequencies coupled with subconscious-guided therapy while you relax and do absolutely nothing. Head over to my new YouTube channel and try out my library of wellness tracks for free.
4. Let go
Let go of everything that no longer serves you across all areas of your life. This includes any belongings, experiences, places, people, habits, illnesses/ailments, thoughts, and emotions that do not serve you. Let them all go and make space for the things you do want to keep and be. This process of letting go and replenishing is natural. Take a leaf out of nature's book, and let go through autumn and winter, ready to make way for new blooms in the spring and summer.
5. Find joy
We are often so wrapped up in life’s routines we forget to make time for the things we enjoy. You may have even forgotten what you enjoy, or perhaps with time, the things you used to enjoy are no longer enjoyable. Take some time to rediscover yourself, find out who you are now. You could start by writing out a list of 10 things that bring you joy, simple, easily accessible things like your favourite drink, food, TV program or book. Plan in some time to do 1 or 2 of these things every day from now on.
6. Prioritise
Use a traffic light system to categorise your to-do list, labelling your task as red, amber, and green based on their level of importance. For example, health (physical and emotional health to include relationships), finances (ensuring basic needs like shelter, food, and safety are covered), and the needs of your children only are green tasks that need to be fulfilled urgently. Remember not to take on surrogate stresses from other people; kindly give their problems back to them!
7. Live in the now
Focus on what is happening now; we have control over what’s happening in real time, unlike the past or the future. It’s very easy to become wrapped up in past experiences that have left their mark. So much so that you find yourself worrying about whether past experiences will reoccur in the future, the truth is that living in the past or the future can cause anxiety. Stay here in the present and enjoy all the wonderful things you have in your life today.
8. Rule out physical health issues
Visit the GP. So many physical health issues can also cause the same symptoms as emotional overwhelm. The majority of the time, there is nothing serious at play, most likely a minor viral infection or maybe a vitamin deficiency such as anaemia. It’s important to rule out any illnesses. Everything feels more difficult when we’re physically unwell. See things for what they are, so many of my clients worry that they may be slipping back into old habits or previous ill mental health conditions, but in reality, their emotional and mental symptoms are a side effect of being poorly. Help yourself out with supplements, water, and enough sleep.
9. Wellness routine
It’s time to commit to a simple wellness routine; it doesn’t have to be anything taxing. Simply repeating the eight steps above in a weekly format will work wonders. Practising wellness is just as important as practising hygiene. If you don’t brush your teeth, you’ll suffer; the same goes for emotional wellbeing. A few simple self-care rituals could be transformational and prevent emotional overwhelm from creeping up on you ever again!
Your journey to wellness starts here. Follow me on Instagram and visit my Facebook page for daily inspiration, exclusive sneak peeks of 21-Day Rescue (launching this March), and updates on my brand-new podcast, which is coming soon!
Feel better and live better.
Read more from Kathryn Peruga
Kathryn Peruga, Social Emotional Mental Health Consultant
Kathryn Peruga, MEd Psychology, is a GHR-registered Clinical Hypnotherapist, and founder of Change Well Therapies, specialising in subconscious therapy to help individuals break free from overwhelm and anxiety. As a mother and homemaker, she blends professional expertise with real-life experience, empowering others with practical, lasting solutions for clarity, confidence, and emotional resilience.
