Written by: Sarah Needham, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
It brings the values of creativity & innovation to life! Let me explain with my example.
I worked in the male-dominated tech industry for 17 years. I was receiving a constant stream of commentary on my Emotional Intelligence (EQ) channel & often did not allow it through, and only rarely did I allow myself to voice it.
I have strengths in empathy, harmony & inclusion which meant that I was scared I would be laughed at, or cause conflict, or just be seen as different! Worst case scenario I would be excluded, labeled as being too emotional.
My own strengths worked against me!
I could have brought so much more value to many conversations!
I did not understand the value of listening to my EQ channel because I did not see it’s value; in truth I saw it as a weakness, as a distraction from the accepted hard facts & data.
I tried my best to switch it off!
Worse still in allowing myself to be scared, I was not living up to what was important to me, my values of connection, openness, empowerment & innovation.
I often felt like I was stuck in the middle of a tug of war… inside my own head!
Stepping out of industry & into coaching, I see how EQ holds the key to stepping bravely into the meaningful conversation to create innovative solutions to the problems we face today; both in the workplace & in creating a more sustainable future for life on Earth!
I believe that if we can enable meaningful conversations about important topics within cognitively diverse teams, we can solve ANYTHING.
But that means engaging with others on all levels openly & this is scary.
It is scary because it is not black or white, can be difficult to put into words & it is not something we are taught in school.
Ignoring (or not encouraging) EQ you are overlooking valid information to create the most effective & workable solutions to whatever problem you face. Unless you can create space for EQ to become a valid input then there is little chance of discovering optimal solutions & unnecessary mistakes will be made.
Unfortunately when people don’t feel safe to share their thoughts & feeling they leave a part of themselves at the door when they walk into work. The result of this in business terms is you are leaving money or impact untouched that could enable you to build a sustainable business for the future.
Therefore we must actively engage & encourage people to bring their full selves into work to have the chance to dig deep & innovate to create meaningful & workable solutions for the future!
This creates empowered & motivated employees which translates into a more sustainable business. Why would you NOT do this?
So how can you unlock this potential in your organization or community?
1. If you are reading this with this sense of ‘this is me, I have EQ’, then I ask you to do one thing. Use it by NAMING IT! I know this feels scary!!!! Here’s how.
‘I sense frustration (/anger/we are not aligned..), what is here for you right now?’ - open, direct, honest, curious, non-judgemental!
Say it because you are curious to understand what this information holds. Say it without judgment or the need for your interpretation of your sense to be right. You are just opening a new opportunity for conversation. Your sense is valid even if how you have put it into words is wrong.
NEWSFLASH: If you have high EQ, it is a strength. Yes, it does make you different; AND you can use it to help yourself & those around you by opening up conversations that would not ‘normally’ be had. You are receiving information that others are not aware of. Just because EQ does not get taught at school does not mean it’s not valuable!
I love the saying that EMOTION is Energy in MOTION.. so just by naming it you bring it out of the shadows & it becomes conscious. We all have an emotional side of us which informs every single conversation & decision because of …our life story, our values, our feelings that day, what happened to us directly prior to this meeting etc!
Let me tell you what will happen when you name what you sense. It changes the energy in the room in any conversation…. In fact, it often stops people because generally we are so unaccustomed to having emotions named & discussing feelings openly in the way we discuss facts, figures etc.
2. If you are reading this & don’t recognize that you sense what others are feeling but recognize the opportunity that opening the door to EQ holds; then I challenge you to share this article in your upcoming team meetings.
You can use the words for example ‘I want us all to read this article & figure out how we can create this opportunity within our conversations.’
If you do decide to do this just a small health warning…you need to look at creating an environment where EQ input is valued on a continuing basis! Why?
This is not a short-term fix. AND a lot of people with high EQ are similar to me they are often strong on either harmony or empathy, or both! This means they will sense if something is not authentic. It also means that if the input is not used, or seen not to be valued then they will likely not share for long; then you might as well have not bothered!
So can you harness the power of EQ in your organization for the greater good? What is one small step you can take?
Share this article with someone who you know who has strong EQ! You may just be giving them the key to unlocking their strength & getting curious about its potential.
Sarah Needham, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine Sarah Needham is a coach with an extraordinary vision: “To create a world where everyone feels they can stand up and engage in discussion about what matters most.” She wants us all to take off our invisibility cloaks and share courageously what we think and feel. Sarah believes that we are all unique for a reason, and we should challenge ourselves to step proudly into our uniqueness, our own SUPERPOWER! As a coach, she challenges herself to inspire people by holding regular sessions on this topic. Sarah’s work brings together her three core values: technology, sustainability, and challenging others to embrace their uniqueness. She helps tech founders and leaders unleash their impact in creating a more sustainable life on earth whilst prioritizing their own self-care, and in doing so, creating a more sustainable business. Sarah is an engineer with many years as a leader at one of the world's leading global engineering corporations. She is British, living in Potsdam, Germany, with her husband, two adopted daughters, and two cats.
