Written by: Alicia Rios Wilks, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Conventionally, we’re taught that obsessive eating behaviors are disorders or illnesses. In treatment, people are taught that they are victims to said disorder and that they must use their willpower to fix themselves. Some people are even told that they’ll never be able to fix themselves but they have to use willpower to “live with” the disorder for the rest of their life.
The truth that we must realize is that the people experiencing these “mental illnesses” actually created them for themselves, for a reason. It was the best that they could do with what they had at the time. And as the creators, they do not have to be victims to it. They can choose to create something else. What we’ve traditionally done is belittled anyone who’s struggling with eating by calling them a “dysfunctional” human being. We’ve labeled them as having something severely “wrong with them” by diagnosing them with a disorder. And we treat them as if they’re a casualty to some formidable disease.
At every turn we’re setting them up to believe they’re literally trapped.
We’re reinforcing the very identity we’re telling them to snap out of. And we shroud them in judgment from the start. No wonder people don’t want to talk about it. We’re doing everyone a bitter disservice by convincing them they’re not in control of their behavior. We offer up alternative explanations to satisfy unanswered questions, leading people down the “I was born this way” route, and the “my brain just doesn’t work right” dead-end.
The symptoms and behaviors we label as “disorders” are really the result of the mental structures we’ve created. However, when people believe they’re a victim to an illness, they also believe they have no power to change those structures.
It’s no mystery we dread diagnoses when they automatically shove us into the “victim” bucket. They hit like a gavel proclaiming a life sentence – either a life accepting prison or a life fighting to escape it. But it’s all based on a false premise that we’re not the creators of our reality. As radical as it may seem, my work centers on the knowledge that the thought patterns, emotions and actions that satisfy the diagnostic criteria of an eating disorder is, in reality, purely the result of specific focuses and code (instructions) running across all levels of the mind. Our mind runs what is essentially code (information ordered as instruction), rather like how we program AI to function (after all, AI was built to mimic the mind).
When we focus on something, it’s like putting an address into our internal GPS. The only thing our mind knows to do with it is to move toward it – even if what we meant was that we wanted to avoid it. The way it moves us is dependent upon the instructions we have coded into our minds. It’s like we each have our personal bank of directions. We follow the paths as laid out by the code.
These paths connecting us to the destinations that we’re focussing on are what we call “structures”.
As we move through life, we all do our best to understand the world – so that we can successfully navigate it – by creating structures. The structures we form are based on what we learn (especially during childhood) about how to get what we want and ensure our needs get met. Our structures then create our behavior – both internal (thoughts and feelings) and external (outer actions).
What I see is that people who have an eating disorder are simultaneously operating within structures of obsession and addiction. I wrote more about the structure of addictions, especially those that are not related to substances, here.
Eating disorders are not weaknesses, nor mystical conditions to be feared or judged.
They may be complex (layered) but they are not, in fact, disordered. The mind and body are functioning exactly as instructed. But, as with everything, the behavior depends on the structure. When we understand the underlying structure the behaviors make perfect sense. When we try to understand it through the lens of an illness or diagnosis the treatment will be neither effective nor permanent. Hence the slow and miserable level of success we currently see. A UCSF-LedStudy found that just 21 percent make a full recovery from anorexia nervosa. ¹ And a systematic review of 16 studies found that 31% of people relapsed after treatment. ²
It’s not easy to choose to let go of old patterns when you have a long-reinforced belief that says they’re the only way you can get what you want.
Reluctance to cease the self-imposed suffering of obsessive eating behaviors is not just “being stubborn” or “crazy”. It’s a fear that giving up that struggle will result in a suffering more grave than their current “hell” i.e., giving up their only control, which they believe will result in the loss of every outcome they desire in life. And if you’ll lose everything you want in life, the question arises of whether or not it will be worth living.
That’s why trying to convince them to just give up their eating disorder is as counterproductive and ineffective as suggesting they choose death.
Current treatment tries to take away their perceived life-line, offering but a measly promise that “everyone will be happier when they’re healthy”.
In my experience, the code people are running in this structure is often that being smaller equals being happier. Therefore controlling food intake equals feeling better. If your request to “get healthy” means eating more and getting bigger, that’s an absolute no-go zone because all that equals is inner torture and anguish. In other cases people are running a code about needing to be in control of something in order to feel better and food is the one place where they can exert control. So when you tell them to “get healthy” by eating more and getting bigger you are taking away the one thing they believe they can control and depriving them of the one thing they do to “feel better.” Would you choose ultimate anguish just to make the people who coerced you into that very situation feel “happy”?
No one in traditional treatment is offering a path to create the body they desperately desire without their current pain and suffering. So, of course pain and suffering seems their only choice.
I do not ask my clients to give up their eating disorders. I ask if they want to create the body they dream of, whilst living in Radical Freedom – no compromises, rules, or limitations.
No one has to sacrifice the body they want in order to have the lifestyle they long for – where things feel easy and joyful. We can have it all. That’s what I teach. And that’s why my clients witness their eating disorders disappear as they go far beyond “recovery”, all the way into Radical Freedom.
Our true capacity for change becomes accessible once we stop telling ourselves stories of limitation. “Mental illness” is just a clinical definition based on observable patterns. These patterns are not incurable, nor are they a trap. All people have the power to be completely in control of what they create for the future. It’s time to stop treating illnesses, and start teaching people how to use their inherent power – the same power that created an eating disorder – to create something else that they would prefer. After all, our experience of life shouldn’t be chosen for the people who love us or the people who are paid to care for us, but for ourselves.
No matter your current experience, you are not limited to the current reality; you can create a new one. If you’d like to discuss how we can do that you can book into my calendar here.
Follow me on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, and Youtube, or visit my website for more information on how you can escape unwanted patterns to live in Radical Freedom.
Alicia Rios Wilks, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Alicia Rios Wilks is a multi-award-winning thought leader on a mission to spark a Radical Freedom Movement. She is an innovator in combining human consciousness, mind and body transformation, and breakthrough performance. Like many of her clients, Alicia had spent much of her life feeling powerless, unsatisfied, and limited. To create her own transformation, Alicia brought together top research on the nature of consciousness and the structure of reality and pioneered a revolutionary method designed for the most powerful and rapid transformation humanly possible. She has since dedicated her life to helping others harness their innate power to release emotional blocks, live as the fullest expression of their true self, and intentionally create their dream life. She is the founder and creator of Radical Freedom, creating heart-centered spaces for others to learn how to live an unlimited life, connect to their unique superconscious genius and live their true nature and purpose.
References:
[1] Leigh, S. (2019). Many Patients with Anorexia Nervosa Get Better, But Complete Recovery Elusive to Most. [online] Many Patients with Anorexia Nervosa Get Better, But Complete Recovery Elusive to Most | UC San Francisco. Available at: https://www.ucsf.edu/news/2019/11/416006/many-patients-anorexia-nervosa-get-better-complet e-recovery-elusive-most.
[2] NICE. (2019). CKS is only available in the UK. [online] Available at: https://cks.nice.org.uk/topics/eating-disorders/background-information/prognosis/.
