Written by: Rachel Shieff, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Have you ever been so scared of failing at something that you froze and took no action at all? Or has a fear of failure paralyzed you or caused you to be aggressive? If we’re honest, most of us have experienced this at one time or another. The fear of failing can stop us in our tracks – and with inaction, there’s no growth and plenty of missed opportunities. To remove the fear of failure it’s important to be able to understand the cause of it and try to move through it.
What is fear of failure?
In our minds, we believe that what we’re afraid of is dangerous, and that’s because it’s the closest thing to danger we will experience, but actually, it isn’t dangerous at all. People can be as scared of standing up and giving a speech as stepping in front of a bus, which is REALLY dangerous. Is it the speech that’s causing the fear? No, if it was, everyone would be scared of giving a speech. It’s how we see the speech in our minds that is causing the fear. It’s nothing but our imagination causing the fear, and when we uncover the evidence that it’s not real, we aren’t scared anymore.
Where does the fear of failure come from?
Fear is often rooted in events that happened in our childhood. As an example, let me share my son’s experience of ‘fear of failure’ that stemmed from an experience he had in primary school… His teacher ridiculed him by showing his messy work to the rest of the class, saying “Look at this as an example of what NOT to do!” He felt overwhelming embarrassment and shame and wanted to hide under the table.
He carried those feelings of embarrassment and shame through to other areas of his life, right into adulthood. It wasn’t until I asked him powerful questions to uncover new evidence, that he was able to prove the belief wasn’t real. Holding onto fear as an adult can lead to procrastination, reluctance to try new things, lack of confidence, missed opportunities and failure to follow through on goals.
Understand your fear of failure
To understand your fear of failure, you must write down specifically what you’re scared of and in what situation it occurs. Consider what else is involved with the fear: the location you experience it, what happens and what part you play. By diving into the fear you’ll be able to pinpoint exactly what you’re afraid of, and that is very often a belief that isn’t even true.
Move through the fear
To move through the fear of failure you have to embrace it and realize it’s just an emotional reaction to something unfamiliar. If you want to get ahead, allow yourself to feel fear. Ask yourself, what is the worst thing that could happen? And then ask, what is likely to happen? In reality, probably something quite insignificant.
Asking yourself, what can I learn from facing my fear? And how can facing my fear help me to grow? Will make you realize that embracing your fear will make you stronger and more confident.
Take action and review
Now you understand your fear of failure, you know where it comes from and you’ve realized what is likely to happen if you fail, it’s time to take action – Face your fear!
Write down what you learned from taking action and how the experience made you feel. Was it worth being scared this whole time? What will you tell yourself next time you feel fear?
You’ll realize the fear you once felt has reduced significantly, and the more you talk about it, the more the fear will break down.
I hope this article helps you to realize that fear of failure is just an illusion stemming from beliefs. You can remove the fear to a great extent by working through this process, but working with a trained coach will eliminate your fear of failure for good. I’d love to know how this process works for you and if you want to push through your fear and Be Unstoppable, click here.
Rachel Shieff, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Rachel Shieff is a leading Mindset Coach. Through her individualized approach, she explores a client’s personal history to gain a thorough understanding of the challenges and self-limiting thoughts that are holding them back. She then evaluates their situation and prescribes a coaching journey with clearly defined objectives, and action steps to take them from where they are now to exactly where they want to be. Rachel’s magnetic energy brings out the best in people, and that’s probably why people naturally go to her for help and advice, and to share their problems in confidence. This has happened to her throughout her life.
