Written by: Charlotte Elizabeth Scott-Terrell, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
As I stated in Part 1, we were created to love. Hear me and hear me good…excuse the grammar! It is never a bad thing to love someone. Never! I didn’t say it isn’t a bad thing to stalk, harass, pine after, or obsess over someone; I said love. When I say love I mean a genuine, pure, feeling and motive that entails: sacrifice, compromise, selflessness, trust, and vulnerability. None of those aforementioned attributes are comfortable and most people shy away from exhibiting them, hence why I said in part one most people want to give love.
Sure, everyone wants someone in their life that will love unconditionally, sacrifice, and give 100%but, when people shy away from reciprocating this “helpless surrender” as some would call it. Love is often everything we’re not. But, before you get mad at me and give up on love understand that it is not all your fault. We love from our experiences.
For example, when you grow up in a house where your father shows his love by providing food and shelter but, he does not say it, nor does he show any affection. Mom, on the other hand cosigns on whatever your dad says, and she cooks your favorite meal, when you’re hurting, and she secretly gives you hugs and a little money in your pocket, when your father isn’t looking…this is what you see and later display. Fast forward to your relationships; as you recall all of the pain, abuse, and disappointments of relationships (familial, platonic, and romantic relationships alike), and don’t forget to add the relationships that have gone terribly awry, these things all of encompass your “experience”, and you love from that place.
Real intimacy/relationship with God, releasing the former things, healing from past hurts, forgiveness, etc., all play a major role in determining our love dna or, capacity to love with our whole hearts. As I stated before…Everyone wants love; most people (and I’m being generous using the word most) want to give it. Everybody is not capable of offering the love we want. Nevertheless, the takeaway message here is people love differently; generally according to the love they’ve seen and experienced. As you seek the love you feel you deserve, know your value, first, and then make sure you are able to give the love that you desire from someone else. Who you are is what’s in your heart.
Charlotte Elizabeth Scott-Terrell, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Charlotte Terrell is a Transformational Life Coach, Speaker, and Author. She has worked as a Clinical Therapist, Trainer and Educator. Charlotte has a Bachelor’s degree in Social Work, a Master’s in Rehabilitation Counseling, and a second Master’s degree in Education. Today, she personifies what it means to ascend above adversity while inspiring countless others to do the same. A highly driven woman who was born to break barriers, she proves that when powered by purpose, women are unstoppable. She inspires. She empowers. She unleashes. Extraordinary at walking others through a radical transformation, she is as relentless about her client's success as she is about her own.
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