Written by: Rachael Downie, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
“You cannot escape from a prison unless you know you are in one.” ‒ Vernon Howard
It’s critical to be able to make a decision, but most people don’t actually know how to make one because they haven’t been taught either from their parents or at school. You have to learn how to make decisions and what is is that you really want.
Growing up most of your decisions were made for you. From the clothes that you wore, the food that you ate, the school you went to, what you were taught, the presents you were given and the places you travelled. These were all somebody else’s decisions that were made for you.
Subsequently not knowing how to make a decision can make you feel unsure of yourself. You were programmed to literally ask for everyone’s advice external to you and then weigh all your options. Sometimes you make the decision and sometimes you don’t.
This results in a lack of confidence. I’ve worked with clients who’ve had to start with making decisions from a restaurant menu. They were so used to asking the question, “What’s everyone else having?” that they never even considered what they wanted. When they first began to make these choices, they felt really uncomfortable, because they weren’t used to doing it.
Procrastination is the opposite of decision-making. I believe that procrastination is like a disease. It keeps you stuck in the same prison of worry, doubt, fear and lack and wastes a lot of time and energy. The problem is that procrastination has become the way of the world. It’s what keeps you exactly where you are. You question things over and over. People who don’t know how to make decisions for themselves will continually ask everybody else for their opinion with this question:
What do YOU think I should do?”
This demonstrates a lack of trust in your ability to make decisions for yourself. The better thing would be to ask yourself – What do I think I should do?
Making a decision is so closely linked with your self-image, your concept of yourself. ( I go further into this in chapter 6 ) When you have a self-image that doesn’t allow you to make a decision, it’s linked to your self-worth. Being able to ask yourself what you do want and then make a choice is the first step. If you’re in business or a job that requires you to make decisions all the time, it can be exhausting to always be seeking other people’s input, weighing all the options when you could make the decision yourself easily and effectively.
Let’s look at what a decision is. You can just google this for yourself and you will come up with things like:
a conclusion or resolution reached after consideration
the action or process of deciding something or of resolving a question The word decision comes from the Latin term:
“To cut from any other possibility”
“When making decisions, you have to learn to make them quickly and change them slowly.” This is what the successful people do according to Napoleon Hill. This may go against the grain of everything you’ve been programmed to believe. The more you understand yourself, the more you understand what you want and the clearer you become about your goal. It becomes easy to make a decision because you’ll go within and ask yourself.
This makes the time frame quicker for decision-making because you won’t be going outside of yourself for the answer and asking everybody else. Knowing yourself is actually a matter of trust. Trusting yourself to make the decisions in alignment with what you want.
Continue to ask yourself questions: Is this decision taking me further away or closer to my goal? No-one outside of you knows what you really want, which is why it’s so critical to know where you’re going and keep yourself focused on the target.
What qualities does it require to make a decision? You have to be courageous and you have to be confident. If this isn’t part of your self-image, you’ll need to build it in. It’s actually another decision to move away from the masses and decide to think for yourself. How does a confident person think, feel and act? How would a confident person make a decision?
I love the following quote:
“Once you have made the decision, you will find all the people, resources and ideas you need ... every time”. – Bob Proctor
And it’s true. Bring in some faith here. This is what you need in the recipe of making a decision. Faith in yourself that you’ve made the right decision for you, and faith that it will take you to where you want to go. Fear and faith both involve you believing in something you cannot see. You probably didn’t make decision in the past due to fear. Why not make decisions based on faith? Failing forward is also part of making a decision. You’ll make mistakes, give yourself permission to – it’s where the real growth lies.
Get clear on what you want and set your goal. Start taking action in alignment with your goal. You only need to take the first few steps. The how will show up and that’s where faith comes in. Our logical, analytical, programmed part of the mind has a hard time with this. It wants to know the “whole” how. It’s just like driving your car. You know where your destination is and the road is up ahead, but you may only see a few 100 metres in front of you. This is still enough to get you there.
Once you grasp this concept, you’ll find that making decisions for yourself is part of creating a new habit.
Rachael Downie, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Is your mindset holding you back in your business? Rachael Downie is a successful mentor and someone who is truly focused on converting your thinking into results. Rachael works with a variety of individuals, businesses, and CEOs both locally and internationally ‒ simply because we all have the same blockages, doubts, limited thinking, money, and staffing issues. (and if you don't, you are probably one of the 3% who is an unconscious competent, who may find it difficult to transfer your success skills to your staff or family). Rachael loves helping you create success not only in your business but also in other areas of your life.
