Written by: Tamara Mendelson, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Do you have the Corona Blues? Are you feeling a little anxious, maybe a tad unmotivated? A bit sluggish? Were you sheltered for a year? Does wearing a mask raise your blood pressure?
Perhaps you do have the COVID Blues. Know you are not alone.
5 Tips To Feel Better Almost Immediately
The term languishing has been in the media lately.
First coined by Sociologist Corey Keyes in a 2002 study, Keyes identified languishing as the opposite of flourishing. Since Corona began rapidly spreading worldwide, we all seem to be walking around with a big black cloud over our heads. Like Eeyore – the famous glum donkey from Winnie the Pooh whose tail must be tacked on by one of his friends – he is always grumpy.
The simple stress of daily living has become compounded by a worldwide pandemic, which not coincidentally is the worst public health crisis in more than 100 years. The added pressure of demonstrations in response to the long history of injustice, prejudice, and many forms of discrimination surrounds us all. Some have been strained simply because their political leaders do not share their core values. Put any or all of those factors together, plus employment uncertainty, isolation, and any sense of normalcy are shattered. And now that we have a light at the end of the tunnel, why do we still feel so down? I call it the Corona Virus blues.
As reported in the New York Times, organizational psychologist Adam Grant describes what the “blah” people feel after COVID. He also calls this malaise “languishing” and suggests being in a state of “flow” or concentrating on small, completable tasks may help. Grant may be onto something here. According to HuffPost, a new study suggests that finding “flow” reduces loneliness and can help to feel less alone as the pandemic stretches on. Each of us can find flow in different activities.
I can’t help but ask, is flow the only way?
It feels like the blues are a worldwide phenomenon. Many of us have lost loved ones. Many are still struggling from the lasting effects of COVID-19. People are still dying daily. There is a lot of resistance to the vaccine, and in some places, it isn’t available at all.
So, what do we do now?
1. Take a breath. Living through a pandemic is a marathon, not a sprint. Save some energy. Pace yourself and try to be kind. There was so much fear and disinformation at the beginning of 2020. Our leaders told us things would be fine. Then they were not. Three million people died of this horrible disease, and most of us sat in our homes sheltering-in-place, not knowing what to do. Before you let anxiety get the best of you, do something else. Any small accomplishment can put you in a state of flow. Bake some bread. If you don’t have the patience to let it rise, make the quick kind, like banana bread. Find the easiest recipe you can. Watch a five-minute video. It is all out there for the taking, every conceivable recipe. Baking can give you something delicious to focus on. It is an activity with a beginning, middle, and end. The scent of something baking can make you breathe in some much-needed positive energy that comes with trying something new, even for a little while. Organize the pictures you have promised yourself to arrange for ten years. Clean out the basement. Rearrange the refrigerator. Start thinking about looking for a new job. Send one email to a friend or colleague to help you brainstorm your next move.
It’s spring in most parts of the world. Leave your phone in your pocket and go outside to enjoy the flowers. Watch some clouds move. Smell the grass. Listen to birds chirp or kids play. Get yourself a small treat from the local shop. You deserve it. Begin living again, a little bit at a time.
And if you can’t manage any of that because it seems like too much, then take another deep breath. Start with that. A breath that goes all the way down to your abdomen. Now hold it for a few heartbeats and let it out slowly. As you repeat this exercise, your heartbeat should slow, and oxygenating your cells should have a calming effect.
2. Quit overloading yourself with information.
Limit your exposure to news and or information. The internet has made it possible to hear, see, or read the headlines 24 hours a day, seven days a week. The problem with all this access we can fall down the rabbit hole of negativity and catastrophizing every event. How many of us have lost an hour or four doom-scrolling stories that pop up on our feeds on Facebook, YouTube, Instagram, and Twitter? It can be even more tempting when it's on your television.
If you have forgotten where you started looking, it’s time to disconnect. All that negative imagery isn’t good for you and can cause some additional fear and anxiety. Who needs more anxiety? Looking down at our phones all day can cause.
And the news isn’t all bad. People are getting vaccinated. People are recovering. In some places, masks are not mandatory outside and in small groups. Recovery is visible every day.
When’s the last time you watched a documentary and learned something new?
3. Take your power back.
Feeling powerless is the worst. Taking small steps to impact your little corner of the world positively will positively help you feel more in control. Donate time, energy, or money to local charities. Do you have old clothes, appliances, or electronic games you don’t use? Find someone who can use them. Perhaps your community center, church, mosque, or synagogue can direct you towards a charity.
Buy responsibly and support brands that give back. Toms Shoes donate a pair of shoes for each pair purchased. Bombas Socks, underwear, and tees do the same thing. Each product purchased is donated to a shelter as socks and underwear are the most requested items. Knickey will recycle your old bras and undies and give you a pair free. Research where your money goes and buy with your conscience.
Other small changes to help our planet while sprucing up your home may be upcycling what you can and swapping out paper towels for classy dish towels. You can also buy sunscreen and other body products that are reef safe.
4. Don’t be alone. Reach out. Don’t isolate. When we aren’t feeling our best, we tend to burrow at home. Working at home has turned us into a sweatpants society. This is the time to reconnect with friends and family you may have been separated from during the pandemic. If you aren’t ready to be face-to-face, make a phone call. No text. Get someone on the phone. It will make you both feel better. No internet is needed. People of a certain generation will appreciate hearing your voice. Plan a dinner out. It’s getting warmer, so a picnic in a park works, too. I have a friend who wore a ball gown for her birthday to her first dinner out after sheltering. Dress up if you feel like it. Celebrate seeing a friend or relative. Maybe comb your hair or get a haircut. Wear something that hasn’t seen the light of day for a year. Wear shoes. Go all out. Socks are optional.
5. Make plans for the future. We are going to have one. There is still a lot of uncertainty, but eventually, this pandemic will be over (or at least contained). Then we’ll have the great privilege of moving forward. Think of all that extra time you will have when your kids go back to school. Maybe this is the year you will make a difference in your relationships, family, or community.
It might be the year to go back to school. Learn something new. Set some goals that you may have been thinking about in February 2020. If you need some help mentally or emotionally to get yourself to move forward, ask.
I’ve worked with many patients this year who were stuck in a rut. Some were healthy. Some were not. Some advanced in their careers. Others have been out of work. This pandemic has impacted all of us, although not in the same way.
A common thread that I’ve noticed with all my patients is an overall malaise. By talking it out, working together to understand where they are helped to understand better what they need now and how to move forward in a more human, more connected, and more person they want to be.
We may all still have the blues. It’s natural to control what you can and let go of the rest. Or as much as you can and breathe and flow. And get someone to help. Talk to someone.
Tamara Mendelson, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Tamara Mendelson is an Internationally recognized writer, a sought-after wellness coach, and an educator with many years of experience teaching Business English – online and in the classroom. Tamara teaches and coaches using humor, compassion, and empathy, which is her students' and clients' favorite superpower. When asked about why she started coaching, Tamara laughs, “I have been coaching all my life, being a good friend, an involved parent, and an empathetic teacher. I just didn’t call it coaching until 10 years ago.” Tamara received a Master’s Degree from Bar Ilan University in creative writing and English literature and has a certificate in Positive Psychology from UPENN. Tamara writes a weekly blog called “This Way Forward” and runs a Facebook Page with the same name where she does exactly that – helps people move forward.
