Written by: Jennifer Wert, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Conscious parenting is leadership. It’s (role)modeling. It’s guiding. And, doing these things well is all about CONNECTION.
There were decades when kids were told what to do and were expected to do so without asking questions. There’ve been times when obedient children were thought to be the most well-parented. Though there is certainly value in some old-school wisdom around family dynamics, I venture to challenge these assumptions.
When kids don’t find consequences or rules relevant, they feel arbitrary and not meaningful. If they can’t understand why you have certain expectations, or where your requests come from (the bigger picture), why would they subscribe? Out of fear? Blind observance?
You want them to inquire, to be leaders and speak their minds. It behooves them to understand what values you’re basing your decisions on and how and when boundaries are put into place, in order to uphold these values. So, connect with them about these things. Share with them what matters to your family and why.
When they speak, your children want to feel like you’re not just hearing their voice, but that you’re actually listening to what they’re saying. Being really listened to is one of the most beautiful gifts in the world. It shows respect, appreciation and acceptance. Give this to your children.
In your role as either the first woman (or man) example they know, be real with them. Make mistakes in front of them. Share your feelings with them. These kinds of experiences require vulnerability and this is what truly strengthens connection. Then, you’re not a bigger figure barking orders, you’re a human, that they know well and respect as such. They can hear you much better this way.
When things are off track or you feel unsure about next steps in your parenting, always come back to remembering the power of connection. Parenting is one of a million things you’re doing in this world. Slow down and make time to reconnect. Look, lovingly, into your children’s eyes. Listen more closely, without agenda. And share from your most authentic self.
Connected parenting is conscious parenting. You can also get connected to her social media accounts; Facebook, Instagram, and LinkedIn! Read more from Jennifer!
Jennifer Wert, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine Professional Parent Coach, Jenn Wert, serves parents of young children around the globe who are looking for support in their conscious parenting. With a Master’s in Education, educator, and doula experience along with post-graduate social-emotional training, Jenn knows how to counsel parents who want to authentically communicate with their children. After decades of her own therapy, while concurrently working with many different family types, she brings honesty to her conversations and discernment to her listening that allows clients to grow. Jenn inspires parenting that is nurturing, true and transformative.
