Written by: Lori Clark, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Childhood trauma. Many people have it and some are even scared to admit it. However, when you don’t address and heal from your childhood trauma; it often shows itself in your day-to-day adult life. For example, if someone was rejected as a child, as an adult they could turn into a people pleaser. The feeling of being rejected at an early age made them feel like they always had to “do something good” to always have approval from others. Or let’s say a person had abandonment issues. Someone in their life constantly pushed them away for whatever reason.
Now that person feels like they don’t ever want to get too close to anyone because that first feeling of abandonment made them realize that they never want to feel like that again. As children we’re taught to listen to our parents, respect them, and obey them. The thing about it is, all parents aren’t ready to wholeheartedly do what it takes to raise children. Thus, leaving the children with mental and/or emotional scars that follow them into adulthood. In this article, we are going to discuss three ways to move on from traumatic childhood experiences.
Address your pain. Children are happy, energetic, and spontaneous. People often think children are not smart enough to comprehend their feelings or even remember how a certain situation made them feel. Think about times where you were disappointed as a child. Times where you felt unloved. Times where you felt unheard. Now look at your adult life and see where things have failed. Do you see a correlation? This is where you need to start. You knew how it made you feel when you were a child. Now that you’re an adult, you’re wiser, more articulate, have access to more resources and guidance, and have the capability to help yourself.
Forgive the people that hurt you. I know that made some of you have a side-eye look. But let me ask you this. Does holding a person accountable from your childhood help you in your adult life? I know there are some people that may not have changed since your childhood. Forgive them from a distance. I also know there are some people who hurt you while they were hurting or didn’t realize they hurt you. You know how you felt and how you still feel, they don’t. you may even be treating them as if they are still presently hurting you. Forgive them. Forgive them and what they did. Your forgiveness could be the start of a brand-new beginning for you and them.
Choose to no longer be a victim but rather a victor. Although dealing with childhood trauma isn’t something you brought upon yourself, it is something you have the power to fix. Once you address how childhood trauma is affecting you and take the necessary steps to forgive and move forward; you will quickly learn how much better you feel. How you now have peace and confidence in your actions. You know you’re not tip-toeing around people, places, or situations based on your past. You will no longer subconsciously self-sabotage yourself. You will be free.
Take control of your life. Live in the present. Heal. Be yourself. You’re amazing.
Lori Clark, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Lori Clark is a leader in the life coaching industry, dedicated to helping individuals overcome life's challenges. She also aims to help people reach their highest potential while eliminating mental barriers. Lori had a rough childhood that led to an adulthood of trying to fill different voids. She eventually made up her mind; she would live a life worth living and changed her world. During this time, her health failed, and she was diagnosed with a chronic illness. Doctors told her she would never be the same. Instead of playing small, Lori took her circumstances and excelled. She finished college, went back to work, and is now certified to help others.
