Brainz Magazine Exclusive Interview
Caroline Middelsdorf is a German-born psychologist and devoted single mom who brings warmth and authenticity to her work. As a trauma survivor herself, she is living proof that healing is possible, and she has made it her mission to be a guiding light for others in moments of darkness. Caroline combines her professional expertise with her personal experiences to create relatable resources that resonate deeply with those seeking support. Through her work, she reminds everyone that they are not alone on their journeys, reminds them of their true self worth and creates a space and community where true healing can actually take place - a place to come home to and belong. She is the living proof that healing is possible.
What motivated you to launch Caroline Middelsdorf, and how does it connect with your work in mental health?
The launch of Caroline Middelsdorf was born from my deeply personal journey through trauma and mental health challenges. I’ve experienced the weight of shame, guilt, and anxiety that can feel like an endless cycle—where envisioning a hopeful future seems impossible. There were times when I questioned everything, even contemplating whether to give up. The love for my child became my lifeline, pushing me to confront my darkness. I made a promise to myself that if I ever found my way out, I would dedicate my life to guiding others through their lonely journeys.
I knew I had to venture beyond the conventional methods I had learned. My curiosity led me to explore holistic approaches and dive deep into the mind-body connection, seeking alternative healing methods that could offer true transformation. I interviewed and attended specific somatic practices and spoke to neuroscientists, nutritionists, yoga teachers, trauma workers, and nurses to expand my understanding and learn from their expertise.
To deepen my insights, I also interviewed people in high-stress or traumatic environments—special force soldiers, ER doctors, CEOs, top-performing international athletes, and even celebrities—to learn how they managed anxiety and overcame adversity. Their stories inspired me and opened my eyes to unique coping mechanisms and practices that helped them thrive. This exploration changed everything for me. It became clear that healing could be approached from many angles, but I found one that worked for me and many others around the globe. I am so grateful to bring a smile back onto people’s faces; it has been such a deeply fulfilling and motivating experience.
Thus, Caroline Middelsdorf was born—a place and resource for real, practical healing from one trauma survivor who walked the path. My mission is to empower others by providing tools that integrate psychological insights with holistic practices, particularly focusing on the nervous system and how our brains process thoughts and experiences.
In my professional role as a psychologist, I often felt disheartened by the limitations of traditional mental health systems. I watched people struggle to access timely support, waiting months for help while feeling isolated in their pain. I knew I had to venture beyond the conventional methods I had learned. That’s why I wanted to create something more accessible in the mental health and coaching space.
My upcoming trauma healing program combines these elements, allowing me to share not only what I’ve learned academically but also my unique experiences and skill set that have worked for me (trauma survivor) and countless other people I’ve worked with around the globe so far. I’m on a mission to help one million people rediscover hope and resilience, showing them that they are not broken and that healing is possible.
In parallel, I co-founded BEYOUMA (Because YOU Matter) with my sister, driven by a desire to create accessible self-help tools. It’s a heart/passion project. We developed a self-help box and an interactive journal filled with techniques for addressing chronic stress, anxiety, panic and symptoms of trauma. This project reflects my belief that everyone should have the resources to help themselves, even before seeking therapy. Through social media and community engagement, I aim to make mental health discussions more relatable and accessible, reminding everyone that healing is a journey but one that’s worth going on…
How does your own experience with anxiety shape the guidance you provide to your clients?
Having navigated my own challenges with anxiety and trauma, I approach my clients with deep compassion and understanding. I know firsthand how paralyzing anxiety can be, how shame can silence us, and how isolating it feels to carry the weight of our struggles alone. This shared experience allows me to connect with my clients on a profound level.
Through my own healing journey, I ventured beyond the confines of traditional psychology and explored the intricate mind-body connection. I found that healing requires more than just talking—it involves engaging the body, understanding our nervous system, and integrating holistic practices that truly resonate. I incorporate these insights into my guidance, offering techniques that have worked for me and many others.
When my clients share their fears or struggles, I validate their feelings and remind them that healing is possible. I celebrate every step they take towards recovery, knowing that overcoming even the smallest hurdles is a significant victory. My own journey taught me that while the path can be challenging, it is also filled with moments of light and hope.
What are some quick techniques you recommend for managing daily stress?
Managing daily stress can be overwhelming, but I encourage people to embrace simple yet effective techniques that can fit seamlessly into their lives. Here are a few that have helped me and many of my clients:
Taking just a few moments to focus on your breath can ground you and provide immediate relief from stress.
Counting backward from 100-1 without skipping a number. This simple exercise shifts your focus and calms your mind when anxiety rises.
Practicing sensory grounding—tuning into what you see, hear, taste, and feel—can help bring you back to the present moment. It’s one of the reasons I included calming tea and essential oils in my created BEYOUMA self-help box.
Whether through dancing or a brisk walk, moving your body releases endorphins and helps alleviate stress.
Writing down your thoughts can clarify emotions and reduce mental clutter. The BEYOUMA journal I created includes prompts to help guide this process, making it a vital tool for reflection and growth.
These techniques are powerful because they can be easily integrated into daily life, offering immediate relief and fostering a deeper connection to oneself.
You’ve mentioned childhood trauma can influence career choices. What are some early signs of this in adulthood?
Childhood trauma shapes our lives in ways we often don’t realize until much later. As I’ve delved into this topic, I’ve seen how deeply our past experiences can influence the careers we choose. For example, many people who grew up in chaotic or unstable environments often find themselves drawn to helping professions—such as therapists, social workers, or caregivers. This is usually because they have a strong desire to heal the parts of themselves that didn’t get the care they needed when they were younger. It’s like they want to be the loving support they missed out on.
On the flip side, those who felt powerless in their childhood might be attracted to roles in law enforcement, the military, or security. These professions give them a sense of control and purpose, allowing them to create safety for others. It’s a way to reclaim agency and ensure that no one else has to feel as vulnerable as they once did.
I’ve also noticed that some people channel their pain into creative outlets like art, writing, or music. These pursuits can be incredibly healing, offering a way to express emotions that might have been buried for years. For many, creativity becomes a lifeline, a way to process and transform their experiences into something meaningful.
Then there’s the drive for perfectionism and overachievement, which is common among trauma survivors. Many of us feel like we have to excel to prove our worth, tying our value to our accomplishments. While this ambition can fuel success, it can also lead to burnout if we don’t take time for self-care. I’ve experienced this struggle firsthand—juggling work and the desire to keep pushing myself, often at the cost of my well-being.
So, what are some early signs to look out for?
Signs to look out for can be:
If you feel an intense urge to pursue careers in caregiving, counseling, or any helping profession, but you often wonder if it’s to heal your own wounds, that’s a key indicator. For example, you might find yourself volunteering or working in fields that allow you to nurture others, hoping to fill a void in your own life.
If you constantly feel the need to be perfect or that you must achieve great things to be worthy, this can stem from early experiences that shaped your self-esteem. You might push yourself to work late into the night, avoiding mistakes at all costs, driven by an internal dialogue that says you're not enough unless you excel.
If you struggle to respect or follow directions from authority figures—whether in the workplace or in everyday life—it may signal unresolved feelings about control and power dynamics from your childhood. You might feel an urge to challenge rules or question directives, stemming from experiences where you felt powerless or dismissed.
If you often find yourself feeling anxious, panicky, or emotionally drained in situations that seem manageable for others—like team meetings or deadlines—this may indicate that unresolved trauma is triggering your nervous system. For example, you might notice your heart racing or your mind going blank when faced with pressure, even if the stakes aren't high.
How do you maintain professional boundaries while engaging on social media?
Maintaining professional boundaries on social media is essential for my well-being and effectiveness as a coach and psychologist. I genuinely love connecting with my community, sharing insights, and providing support, but I also recognize the importance of setting limits.
I remind myself that my social media presence is primarily about raising awareness and sharing helpful tools—not providing personalized or crisis-level support. To avoid burnout, I make a conscious effort to take breaks for self-care and to focus on what truly matters: the connections I build and the value I provide.
The hashtag #CollectingMemories embodies my philosophy of being present and cherishing positive moments. I understand how it feels to be overwhelmed by anxiety and hypervigilance, and I prioritize creating joyful memories with my loved ones. This practice grounds me and helps me remain connected to my purpose.
I’m excited about my upcoming program, where I’ll have the opportunity to engage more deeply with participants. This means so much to me because it aligns with my mission of offering personalized support and nurturing guidance. By setting these boundaries, I can show up authentically, bringing energy and joy to my community while maintaining the focus needed to make a real impact.
What’s a common myth about mental health that you often find yourself debunking?
One of the most persistent myths about mental health is that struggling with mental health issues is a sign of weakness. In truth, acknowledging these challenges takes immense courage and strength. It is a brave step towards healing, connection, and self-discovery.
Another misconception is that trauma only arises from severe events, like combat or accidents. However, trauma can stem from many sources, including emotional neglect or abuse—experiences that often leave invisible scars. I emphasize that it’s not just the event itself, but how it affects us personally that defines trauma.
Additionally, many believe that time heals all wounds. While time can provide some distance, true healing often requires active engagement and self-help. I strive to empower people to take ownership of their healing journey, reminding them that recovery is possible and can lead to a life full of hope and purpose.
How do you stay grounded while balancing the demands of running Caroline Middelsdorf, BEYOUMA, working as a coach and psychologist, and being a single mom?
Staying grounded while juggling my work and being a single mom can feel like walking a tightrope at times, but I’ve learned to prioritize what truly matters. My son is my greatest joy and my top priority. Whether we’re playing at the park, reading our favorite stories, or sharing heartfelt conversations, those moments create lasting memories that nourish my soul and remind me of what love really looks like.
My passion for helping others is more than just a job; it’s my mission. It doesn’t feel like work to me.. I believe that true connection and unconditional love at home are essential for my well-being and for the energy I bring to my professional life. This is why I embrace my philosophy of #CollectingMemories—focusing on creating joyful experiences with my loved ones, which helps ground me amidst all my responsibilities.
I also make it a point to practice what I preach. I incorporate the techniques I teach into my own life, ensuring that I’m not just offering guidance but genuinely living it. This includes maintaining my own therapy and support systems, which are vital for keeping me balanced and resilient. My small circle of trusted friends is invaluable in this journey. They provide a safe space where I can share my thoughts and feelings without judgment, reminding me that I’m not alone in this. These authentic connections help me stay focused on what truly matters.
I’m intentional about being present in my life, especially after having experienced the struggles of finding joy and connection. I’ve learned that it’s okay to express my needs and set boundaries. By doing this, I can ensure I’m taking care of myself and fully showing up for my son and the community I serve.
Balancing all these demands is an ongoing journey, but I approach it with purpose and fulfillment. I want my experiences to resonate with others, showing that it’s possible to navigate life’s complexities while nurturing the love and connections that truly matter.
Finally, what’s next for Caroline Middelsdorf, and what impact do you hope to have in the coming years?
The future for Caroline Middelsdorf is filled with exciting opportunities which I am so grateful for and never thought would be even possible! I’m launching my intensive trauma healing program in December 2024, with the main aim to make healing accessible for everyone. Already, my mini-program has received wonderful feedback.
I will be on a few podcasts this year and hopefully in 2025 – something I am very excited about since I struggled with massive anxiety in the past – so getting out of my comfort zone is not always easy but also so empowering. I will be having my own podcast in 2025 with amazing, interesting people and to provide as much value as possible. I will keep collecting new memories and hopefully create wonderful ones in 2025. I am excited for 2025.
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