Written by: Jan Bailey, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
It was going so well until, umm … Uh, what was I saying? Despite the increasing popularity of AI and the heralded benefits of using it to generate ideas, rephrase reports or create cool slides, the reality is, you are still the person who needs to present it. Whether you’re sharing the information in front of your team, the executive committee or the board, there’s no AI to help you. And for most people, that comes with a few challenges.
I work with professionals from sales teams to C-suite, helping them shift their perspective, build their skill and develop their confidence to become effective communicators who speak clearly, confidently and concisely in front of any audience. What’s always fascinating to me, is there are a number of recurring themes when it comes to what people fear when they’re speaking to an audience. One of the biggies? “I’m afraid I’ll forget what comes next”.
What does that look like?
My mind goes blank,
I can’t find the right word
The acronym evaporates,
I lose my way
It’s just gone …
All of these are bad. All of these are uncomfortable. All of these make every speaker nervous. The good news is that if this has happened to you, you’re not alone. Now that might not sound like good news as you first read it, but it really is.
It means that if this happens to other people, there’s nothing wrong with you. Your brain is not somehow synaptically challenged under pressure. Okay, so that last bit might not even be a real word: but experiencing gaps, blanks or brain farts when you’re presenting isn’t that unusual.
Though there’s comfort in knowing you’re not the only business person who has occasional gaps in language when they’re speaking, it’s still not that helpful. So let’s talk strategy. If the odds are good that in some presentation you will lose your train of thought, lose a specific word or lose your place, it’s important to have a plan.
For most people, there’s a feeling of reassurance just knowing there’s a plan in place. That’s the first positive thing going for you. It’s a bit like the air bags in your car – you never want to use them, but it gives you confidence knowing they’re there. When speaking in front of others, all confidence is welcome.
Now, let’s imagine. You’re speaking in front of the leadership team about the specialized work you do, or you’re presenting products you know inside out to a new client and for some reason that defies explanation, your brain goes blank.
What just happened?!
Top 10 reasons your brain shuts off when speaking:
You’re running late and you’re crazy nervous
You’re not prepared and you’re crazy nervous
You’re over prepared and you’re crazy nervous
Someone else prepared your talk and you’re crazy nervous
You’re not confident with the material and you’re crazy nervous
This reminds you of your last talk and you were crazy nervous
Your boss just walked in and you are crazy nervous
Your boss just walked out and you are crazy nervous
You’ve never done this before and you’re crazy nervous
You don’t know why, but you’re crazy nervous
It’s adrenalin, people. You’ve heard it before, you’ve heard it in different ways, and you still don’t believe it happens, but crazy nervous is happening to you. When you’re nervous your breathing gets shallow, your heart rate increases, you start to sweat (even though you feel cold), your leg muscles actually shake and your body is practically screaming to your brain – get me out of here! Your brain is no dummy; it reads the physical signs and decides you must be in imminent danger so it gears up. Red alert, red alert:
shut down digestion – extra blood goes to the legs for sprinting;
Increase heart rate and breathing; extra oxygen to arms and legs for escaping;
shut down decision making – the only decision should be to run;
pause all higher order thinking – no need to do calculus when running from danger;
and, maintain until all perceived danger is gone.
Are you still wondering why your brain goes blank at inopportune times? I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again; nervous is not a huge problem, it demonstrates you’re invested in the outcome of your talk. It’s crazy nervous that’s the problem. And sometimes we aren’t even aware we’re that nervous.
Don’t despair. With a plan and a little practice, you can break this cycle and begin to consistently anchor your speaking in feelings of confidence.
Recall; Rewind; Recap; Reboot: 4R’s to recovering your talk when it goes off the rails.
Before using any of the following strategies: Recall, Rewind, Recap and Reboot there are two foundation steps.
Notice: Simply notice the word or phrase has left your brain. For example, ‘hmm, how weird, I can’t remember that word.’ You’ll see I suggest simply noticing rather than ‘alarming’ – ‘oh my gosh, I can’t remember that word, what’s happening!’ See the difference? The panic inducing qualities of you ‘alarming’ will do exactly the opposite of what you need right now.
Breathe: As you’re noticing the gap, take a nice deep breath. If you’re lucky, that will be enough to summon the word, phrase or acronym to your mind. If not … try strategy one.
Speaker confidence strategy one
Recall: One of the things my clients most frequently forget is they are subject matter experts. You’ve likely been asked to give an update, to offer some information or to answer some questions because you are an expert on some level. Even by virtue of working within a subject or discipline every day, you are often more of an expert than the leadership team who has a broader view of each department or specialty. With that in mind, before you begin, consider what the main idea of your talk is. For example – when my audience leaves I would like them to understand, to know or to be familiar with … this or that concept.
Said another way – you have an overall notion, idea or trajectory for the talk you are about to give. So, in that moment of blankness, when you have forgotten a word, a phrase or an acronym:
Notice. Breathe. Recall.
Recall that overarching plan. When you say to yourself; ‘where am I going with this’ or ‘what am I trying to say,’ you might find a synonym pops into your head, or a different path with the same outcome because you are clear on the general direction of your talk.
Speaker confidence strategy two
Rewind: In my communication training work with all corporate levels it never ceases to amaze me how every organization has its own language. To the dismay of many an HR business partner, there are acronyms, short forms, technical lingo, and just plain company speak that would make no sense to any person outside the office. All these forms of language can be stumbling blocks for the presenter. (They are definitely stumbling blocks for the listener, but that’s a topic for another article). Add this ‘company dialect’ to the vastness of the English language and throw in some nervous energy and it’s a recipe for language gaps. All is well as you navigate your presentation and suddenly the word you’re looking for isn’t there. It might be a word you’ve used a zillion times, a word that fits perfectly in that explanation or a word that you wrote and rehearsed; none of that matters because right in the middle of a sentence, it’s unavailable to you… Now what?
Notice. Breathe. Rewind.
Rewind: Take your talk back to the beginning of the sentence in which you dropped the word and just say the sentence again. To the audience it sounds like you are reiterating or emphasizing that sentence, but what you’re really doing is giving your brain the opportunity to re-engage and pick up the word that went missing.
Speaker confidence strategy three
Recap: You’re ticking along in your presentation or your talk and suddenly the way forward is blank. There’s a gap between where you are and where you need to be and you don’t know what to do. Now let’s be clear; a pause in a talk is a welcome thing. When any speaker takes a breath, pauses for effect or simply allows a moment for consideration; that is a very good thing. However, you and I both know there is a pause and then there is a gap and then there is a void of silence that feels uncomfortable and awkward for both the speaker and the audience! When you find yourself on the edge of that feeling:
Notice. Breathe. Recap.
Recap: Say something like, ‘Before I keep going I’d like to review some of the key points.’ Or, ‘There is a lot to cover, so I want to make sure everyone is on the same page’, Or, ‘It occurs to me I should do a quick review before we move forward.’
You get the idea. However casual or formal you feel you need to be, you are simply suggesting to the audience that you are a very considerate speaker and for their benefit, you’re doing a quick look backward to review.
The key to all three strategies; Recall, rewind and recap is to practice staying calm in the moment. Notice and breathe … You’re training yourself to react in a different way and you’re building a new habit for responding to uncertainty; it takes some practice. Notice that things have gone a bit sideways, breathe, and then try one, two or all three of the strategies.
Reboot: Of course the goal of recall, rewind and recap is to reboot your talk in the moment. The ultimate goal, however, is to reboot your confidence in yourself and your ability to get back on track in any speaking situation. Trust yourself to do it … I do.
As a communication trainer specializing in public speaking and presenting, I work with people at all levels of business to improve their confidence in all speaking and presenting scenarios. For more simple strategies and easy to apply tips, follow me on Instagram @ovationspeakers, connect with me, Jan Bailey on LinkedIn or reach out via my website. I would be delighted to help you give yourself the gift of clear, confident communication; every time you speak.
Jan Bailey, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Jan Bailey is a seasoned communication and public speaking trainer specializing in leadership presence, clear communication and confident presenting. Fascinated by the reluctance most people have around speaking up, speaking out and speaking in front of others, Jan set out to change the way people think about public speaking and presenting. More laughter and less lecture, more personality and less powerpoint and a whole lot more confidence means professionals at all levels are more effective communicators. A dynamic speaker, an engaging facilitator and an insightful coach, Jan genuinely believes in the power of effective communication to change lives; personally and professionally.
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