Written by: Nadija Bajrami, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Let’s see how hypnotherapy and mind coaching can be some of the most powerful tools to help you restore and boost your self-esteem and self-love.
Before we talk about all good practices that can help you restore and boost your self-esteem, we first need to understand what it means.
Self-esteem is how we perceive ourselves; what we think about ourselves and how much we value ourselves. Our self-esteem is made up of thoughts and opinions, often formed in our early years, about who we are and what we’re capable of.
The term self-esteem is used to describe a person's overall sense of self-worth or personal value. In other words, how much you appreciate and love yourself. It involves a variety of beliefs about yourself, such as the appraisal of your own appearance, beliefs, emotions, and behaviours.
Self-esteem is an ongoing process, not a destination to arrive at or a goal to achieve. As many studies attest, self-esteem is key for mental health and well-being, keeping depression and anxiety at bay.
The beliefs we have about ourselves can often seem difficult to change. The good news is that they can be changed, it just takes work. There are several ways you can help yourself restore and boost your self-esteem, including personal development work and of course hypnotherapy and mind coaching.
Hypnotherapy is a very powerful tool for improving self-esteem and self-love as it works directly with the subconscious mind - where the negative thoughts about ourselves are stored.
As we grow older though, we tend to forget how important we are and how crucial our own well-being is. Life experiences and challenges can affect the way we feel about ourselves, and we can easily be trapped in a spiral of self-deprecation. This is when hypnotherapy and mind coaching are extremely powerful tools helping us to re-programme our subconscious mind, overcome our self-defeating thoughts and restore our self-esteem and love of self.
We keep hearing about the importance of self-esteem, so let's see why self-esteem is so important to our lives.
Do you say yes when you really mean no? Do you break promises to yourself or neglect your self-care? Is it hard to put yourself first?
If so, it’s time to give yourself the most important gift ever: Self-esteem and self-love.
Self-esteem and self-love are your secret weapons to living a fulfilling life. That’s simply because your inner world creates your outer world.
Before you can receive love and respect from others, you need to love and respect yourself.
When you make decisions out of guilt, a need to please or to avoid conflict, you overvalue the needs of others and disrespect yourself.
This conveys—to yourself and those around you—that you accept very little. That doesn’t feel very good, does it?
Everyone needs self-esteem and self-love. While it’s great to be on the receiving end of love from others, it’s also important to practice self-love daily, as it motivates you to make healthy choices in life.
When you hold yourself in high esteem, you’re more likely to choose things that nurture your well-being and serve you well.
These things may be in the form of eating healthy, exercising, or having healthy relationships. You express your love for yourself by doing things that help you to show up in life as the best version of you.
Most people determine their worth based upon other-esteem. They seek approval and validation from others, and their opinion of themselves isn’t very high unless they get it. True self-esteem isn’t based on what others think of you, since its Self-esteem. It’s basically what you think of yourself. You may think well of yourself and your competence in some areas, but not in others, and your estimation may fluctuate with illness and life’s ups and downs, but if you have good self-esteem, you’ll return to feeling good about yourself. You won’t blame yourself, nor take others’ opinions or what fate throws you too personally. You’ll think you’re an okay person despite losses, ill heath, mistakes, and rejection.
Many people focus on their flaws and have trouble acknowledging their assets. Others have inflated, unrealistic opinions of themselves. Studies contend that narcissists have high self-esteem. I say they lack true self-esteem, because when a major loss occurs, their self-esteem can plummet, especially if it’s in areas that support their self-concept, such as beauty, public acclaim, or material success. The biggest obstacle to self-esteem is self-criticism.
Self-esteem and self-love are intrinsically related. By working on your self-esteem and how you value yourself, you will then improve your love of self. With a higher sense of self-esteem, your self-love is boosted, and this also helps when it comes to setting boundaries in relationships
Having a clear understanding of what your boundaries are and being able to set them, communicates that you value yourself. As a result, you’re more likely to have more fulfilling relationships.
Your relationship with yourself sets the tone for the relationships you have with others. When you treat yourself with love and respect, you give others permission to do the same.
No one is responsible for their own happiness but themselves.
Too often we look for outside affirmations to determine our sense of worth. I am a recovering people-pleaser who constantly put the needs and wants of others before my own. It took me decades to learn how to love myself.
You must love and appreciate yourself before you can love someone else. When it is clear that you treat yourself well and have love, respect, and appreciation for yourself, it sets the tone for how your partner should treat you.
When you take time to care for yourself and give yourself what you need, you are a much better partner, friend, parent, etc.
You’re less dependent on waiting for others to fulfil you. When you already validate yourself, you don’t need other people to make you feel like you are good enough.
What a disaster it is to walk around like you need someone else to complete you when you are whole, complete, and validated independently.
Self-love says that we find happiness within ourselves despite the external validation. If we love ourselves unconditionally, we would be speaking kinder to ourselves.
We wouldn’t compare where we are to anyone else because we would know that this journey is ours and ours alone. We would be our own saviours.
We would find ways to be grateful. We would be happy with our own company and feel complete regardless of relationship status.
I believe it is hard to love others well when you do not take the time to understand who you are and embrace your story.
The goal isn’t to change your narrative to fit. The goal is to understand how your narrative shapes who you are and contributes to your identity.
So many relationships are unhealthy and unbalanced because individuals are seeking others to make them complete.
When you love yourself, you can bring that story with its good, bad, and ugly elements to the relationship without diminishing who you are but allowing others to do the same.
We can then make decisions without expectations of someone saving us because we realize others can enhance our journeys but not complete us.
Without self-esteem and self-love, you drastically decrease your ability to be successful at anything
I have seen first-hand a lack of self-esteem and self-love can derail someone’s career and chances for success. How many highly successful people do you think look in the mirror every day and say, “Ugh, I hate myself”. It's as simple as that.
Without self-esteem and self-love, you drastically decrease your ability to be successful at anything. Failed businesses, relationships, ideas, all stem from a lack of self-esteem and self-love as your confidence is affected.
Get to know yourself to be able to fully esteem the amazing being you are. Treat yourself well. Take time to appreciate yourself. Congratulate yourself on a job well done. Celebrate your small wins. Have a great meal, go do something fun…
Some people equate self-esteem and self-love with selfishness. But that couldn’t be further from the truth.
When you think this way, it becomes hard to take good care of yourself. Delete that limiting belief from your mind. Create a new belief that echoes in your ear: “It’s okay to put my needs first.” Repeat often. It should even become your daily mantra to help embed a new more positive subconscious programme.
The good news is when you esteem and love yourself fully you feed your soul and become the highest and best version of yourself.
It feels natural to take good care of your body, mind, and spirit. Love begets love so you’re drawn to give to others. You have the energy to give and in turn, giving energizes you. Everyone benefits.
And what’s more important than that?
Remember that you can't pour from an empty cup even if you try!
Once you are full of self-esteem and self-love, it is much easier to pour your confidence and love into other people, since you are not trying to give from something that is empty.
So that all makes sense, doesn't it? Well let's go just a little bit deeper on the subject. We all know that we are all energy beings. We are all pure energy only and depending on the way we vibrate, we can attract so many different things in life... And therefore, it's crucial to learn accepting and loving ourselves.
What did Einstein mean when he said "Everything is energy and that’s all there is to it. Match the frequency of the reality you want, and you cannot help but get that reality. It can be no other way. This is not philosophy. This is physics"?
The atoms that make up your body are constantly vibrating at a very fast rate or ‘frequency’. If you are in a positive state of mind you will be vibrating at a very high frequency and this it makes it very difficult for any negative energy to infiltrate you, but if you are unhappy or depressed, not loving yourself the way you should, and vibrating at a very low and slow frequency then you are open to all types of negative energy which will only serve to bring you even further down.
Based on this knowledge what we are at our essence is a vibrational being made up of pure energy, how we vibrate creates the reality around us. Basically, the universe resonates with whatever vibration we are giving off. It does not matter if it is positive or negative, the universe will resonate.
So, you can't expect positive and loving results if you do not vibrate self-esteem and self-love. It's as easy as that!
And this is where hypnotherapy and mind coaching are extremely powerful tools to help you replace the old programmes that are no longer serving you and replace them by positive and healthy ones that will help you towards achieving your goals.
But before we move further, let's just explain what hypnosis, hypnotherapy and mind coaching are.
Hypnosis is a safe and natural state of relaxation with an increased level of awareness during which you are not asleep and are fully in control. You will experience a pleasant state of mind with increased attention and focus. The hypnotic state is similar to some moments in your life when you are daydreaming or fully absorbed in a specific activity like reading for example.
There is absolutely nothing to fear as hypnosis used in a therapeutic environment is totally different from stage and entertainment hypnosis and as you remain in control, you will never be asked to do anything foolish or against your will. For the hypnotherapy session to be successful, the hypnotherapist must have your consent, collaboration and full commitment as the purpose is to help you reach a feeling of being more in charge and in control of your life.
With the use of hypnosis, we create a state of focused attention and increased suggestibility during which positive suggestions and guided imagery are used to help you make the right changes in the way information is stored in your mind to overcome some roadblocks which might be preventing you from achieving your goals and reaching your highest desires and potential.
The positive suggestions the hypnotherapist will be providing you with will "stick" and will slow down the process of automatic thoughts and processes that usually occur when you are facing a specific issue and your mind will not automatically react, will slow down, and listen to the new information.
As our subconscious thoughts are powerful and they form our perceptions, the use of hypnosis will help you reframe your subconscious thoughts and rewire your mindset in a way to help you increase your self-esteem, love, value yourselves and achieve your goals, highest desires and get the life you desire and deserve as no challenge is too big for your mind.
Re-programming your subconscious mind is key to your success as our lives are ruled at 95% by our subconscious mind and subconscious programming.
Now let’s explore mind coaching.
I like very much The International Coach Federation's definition of coaching in general:
"Partnering with clients in a thought-provoking and creative process that inspires them to maximize their personal and professional potential".
Mind coaching is NOT you being told what to do with your life or how to live your life.
Mind coaching is you getting really honest with yourself and realize that there are areas in your life you want to improve to get the life you are longing for. It can be described as a trance-free intervention and a process that encourages you to have a preference for action overthinking. It gives you the tools to step in, get out there and do the work needed to unlock your potential and get the life you want. It is a client-centred approach that requires you to take an active role in the programmes we build together to help you reach your goals.
So, the combined use of hypnotherapy and mind coaching is extremely efficient to help you get rid of stinking thinking and to help you help increase your self-esteem and self-love, to value yourself and reach your goals.
The combined use of hypnotherapy and mind coaching helps you challenge your inner critic and bash negative self-talk to help you move forward with authenticity!
If you are at a place in life where you have to hide parts of yourself to get along, take action and make the necessary changes so that you can be your true, authentic self everywhere you go.
Hypnotherapy and mind coaching have incredible effects in helping you re-programme and rewire your mind to boost your self-esteem level and help you understand that once YOU are accepting and loving yourself, then you become dangerously...UNSTOPPABLE!
You are an amazing being, so stop settling for less than you deserve and keep shining your light. It all starts with you so nurture and embrace who you are. The world needs you.
Nadija Bajrami, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
French by birth, Nadija has lived in Scotland for 7 years and has travelled the world. After recovering from some serious health issues, Nadija had a wake up call and came to Ireland to find her path. She has been living in Dublin since 2017.
Nadija is an empowerment specialist and holds a double diploma in Hypnotherapy, Mind Coaching and online therapy.
She is dedicated to help her clients get empowered, supercharge their confidence and self-esteem, overcome their limiting beliefs as well as manage anxiety, symptoms of traumatic experiences and helps people on their grief and healing journey through her therapy, coaching and spiritual work.
