Written by: Neena Perez, Executive Contributor
Executive Contributors at Brainz Magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise.
Hey there, fellow women entrepreneurs! Are you feeling stuck and struggling to attract those dream clients to your business? Don't worry; you're not alone. As a business expert and someone who has been in your shoes, I understand the unique challenges that women face when it comes to building successful businesses.
One hurdle that often goes unnoticed but significantly affects our journey is shame. Yes, that nagging feeling of not being good enough, of fearing judgment and rejection. It can be a real confidence killer and hinder our ability to attract ideal clients who resonate with our authentic selves.
But fret not, my friend! In this article, we're going to delve into the topic of shame and how it impacts your client attraction efforts. I'll share practical strategies and personal stories to help you break free from this cycle and attract those ideal clients who align with your vision and values.
Understanding shame in business
Hey there, ladies! Before we dive into tackling shame head-on, let's take a moment to understand what it is and how it sneaks its way into our business journeys.
Shame, my friends, is that pesky voice in our heads telling us we're not good enough, that we don't deserve success. It's that sinking feeling that creeps up when we make mistakes or face criticism. Unfortunately, shame doesn't discriminate—it affects women entrepreneurs just like us, no matter what color, religious background, size, shape, or popular we are.
Picture this: I remember when I first started my business, I was excited and eager to make my mark. But as soon as I faced my first setback, that inner voice of shame started whispering, "Who do you think you are? You'll never make it." It paralyzed me and made me question my abilities. It took some time, but I realized that shame was holding me back from attracting the right clients who could truly benefit from what I had to offer.
Recognizing the triggers and manifestations of shame in our business is essential. Maybe it's the fear of being seen as an imposter, the worry that we're not as experienced as our competitors, or even the shame of asking for fair compensation for our services. Identifying these shame triggers helps us understand how they influence our interactions with potential clients and prevents us from building genuine connections.
Remember, ladies, we're not alone in experiencing shame. It's a shared experience that many entrepreneurs face, and acknowledging it is the first step toward breaking free from its grip.
Now that we've shed some light on shame, let's roll up our sleeves and explore how we can overcome it together. Let’s unmask shame and discover strategies to empower ourselves. Trust me, it's time to kick shame to the curb and attract those ideal clients who appreciate and value what we bring to the table!
Unmasking shame: Recognizing and acknowledging
Now that we understand the impact of shame on our businesses, it's time to unmask it and take control. Are you ready? Let's do this!
The first step toward breaking free from shame is recognizing and acknowledging its presence in our lives. It's like shining a spotlight on that sneaky little voice that tries to undermine our confidence. Trust me, I've been there, questioning my worth and doubting my abilities. But once I acknowledged shame for what it was, I could start the process of reclaiming my power.
So, how do we recognize shame? Take a moment to reflect on situations where you've felt small, unworthy, or embarrassed in your business journey. Is it when you receive negative feedback, compare yourself to others, or face a setback? Identifying these moments helps us become more aware of when shame starts creeping in.
Now, here's the important part: instead of beating ourselves up, let's practice self-compassion. Yes, you heard that right! We need to be kind and understanding to ourselves, just as we would be to a close friend. Remember, making mistakes or facing challenges doesn't make us any less capable. It's all part of the growth process.
One strategy that helped me was to reframe my self-talk. Instead of saying, "I'm a failure," I started telling myself, "I'm learning and growing." When I feel afraid of a business decision, I now say, “I am so excited”, the brain will take the information you give it and change the way you feel about the situation. It may seem simple, but it's incredibly powerful. By shifting our perspective and embracing the growth mindset, we can break free from shame's grip and open ourselves up to new possibilities.
So, my fellow entrepreneurs, let's take a collective deep breath and acknowledge that shame has no place in our journey. We are capable, talented, and deserving of success. The path to attracting ideal clients starts with recognizing and acknowledging shame, allowing us to reclaim our power and move forward with confidence.
I’m not done yet!!! In the next section, we'll explore practical strategies to empower ourselves and overcome shame. Get ready to take charge, my amazing friends!
Overcoming shame: Let’s break it down
Get ready to embrace your inner warrior as we explore practical strategies to overcome shame and empower ourselves.
1. Cultivating self-awareness and mindset shifts
It all starts with self-awareness, my friends. Take time to observe your thoughts, emotions, and reactions when shame arises. Notice the patterns and triggers. Once you become aware, challenge those negative thoughts, and replace them with positive affirmations. Remember, you are capable, resilient, and deserving of success just like everyone else.
I used to believe that any mistake I made reflected my incompetence. I made so many “mistakes” in my life and told how stupid I was, and I carried that with me for far too long! But by cultivating self-awareness, I realized that making mistakes is a natural part of the entrepreneurial journey. Like you’ll always hear me say “failure is feedback”. It's an opportunity to learn, grow, and improve. So, embrace the growth mindset and shift your perspective. That will be key in attracting the people you want to work with.
2. Challenging negative self-perceptions and limiting beliefs
Shame often feeds on negative self-perceptions and limiting beliefs we hold about ourselves. It's time to challenge those beliefs, my friends! Identify the self-limiting thoughts that hold you back and replace them with empowering beliefs. It’s what stops you from doing what you really want to do. Remind yourself of your strengths, accomplishments, and the value you bring to your clients.
I used to believe that I needed to be perfect to attract ideal clients, because if I wasn’t perfect they won’t want to come back. But guess what? Perfection is a myth! Embrace your authentic self, imperfections, and all (yep, you are not perfect) I know that may come as a shock to some of you... Your uniqueness is what makes you stand out. Remember, your clients are drawn to your genuine personality and the solutions you offer. Think about who you are attracted to and why, I’m sure it’s their realness.
3. Developing a shame-resilient mindset for client attraction
Building resilience is key to overcoming shame in your business. Learn to bounce back from setbacks and stay focused on your goals, yes goals, you must aim for something. Surround yourself with supportive communities and mentors who uplift and inspire you. Celebrate your wins, big and small, to reinforce your self-worth and resilience.
Building a network of like-minded entrepreneurs was a game-changer for me, I thought I could do this alone and it was taking me forever. Finally, I got over myself and realized working with others is not a weakness and it speeds things up. I found a group of supportive women who understood my struggles and encouraged me to keep going. Together, we celebrated each other's successes and provided a safe space to share our challenges. Now I create that same space for my coaching clients because we are not alone and together we are stronger
Ladies, you have the power within you to overcome shame and attract ideal clients who appreciate your unique gifts. By cultivating self-awareness, challenging negative self-perceptions, and developing a shame-resilient mindset, you'll break free from the shackles that hold you back. I have a whole course on this because I know I’m not the only one out there that deals with this and I want to help as many women entrepreneurs I can to reach their goals.
Remember, attracting ideal clients is not just about the success of our businesses—it's about making a positive impact and creating meaningful connections. Trust in your abilities, be true to yourself, and embrace the beautiful journey of entrepreneurship.
As I’m sure you have noticed, attracting the right people and growing our business starts within us! Celebrate every step forward, knowing that you have the power to attract the right clients who align with your vision. Embrace growth, continuously learn, and inspire others with your resilience and authenticity.
To read another Neena article: click here.
To connect with Neena: info@neenaperez.com
To listen to her podcast: Straight Talk No Sugar Added.
Follow me on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, Twitter, and Youtube, or visit my website for more info!
Neena Perez, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine
Neena is a coach, entrepreneur, author, speaker, podcaster, and chef. She uses all she has been through to encourage and impact lives one at a time. Neena has written her autobiography called “Hit Me With Your Best Shot” ‒ How I Overcame A Hard Hitting Life, which is a story of abuse, teen pregnancy, domestic violence, abortion, hard times, divorce, poverty, finding faith, overcoming and hitting life back when life hits us hard. She is currently a Transformational Life Coach and she helps self-led, heart-centered women transcend their shame so they can be confident, self-actualize their true potential and create the life and business they have always wanted.
